Pride

And suddenly that complete nonsense I spoke of before is no longer nonsense. Telling the whole school about our relationship? Nope, I’m not going to have to do that because Ed did it for us.

The moment Kai and I entered school Monday morning everyone stared. It felt strange. I could feel eyes on me every step of the way to my locker. Sure Kai and I bickered a lot which normally got us many stares but today…today was different.

It wasn’t until a girl came up to me in the hall and finally asked me a question that made me realize maybe saying that to Ed the other day was a mistake.

“Are you and Kai dating?” A girl by the name of Penelope asks. She obviously didn’t mean it in a mean way, it was merely curiosity but it still pissed me off. Good thing Kai is at his locker right now.

“Why the hell are you asking me that?” I spit angrily at the poor girl though she doesn’t seem to take any offense to it.

“Who else would I ask? Kai? He doesn’t talk with girls which only makes it all the more suspicious.” Penelope’s little group of friends have gotten a bit closer than they were a second ago. All are leaning towards the two of us trying to listen to our conversation while not seeming suspicious. They are failing terribly might I add.

Shit. Seriously? Why the hell are these people asking me? What does it matter? I’m really starting to get pissed off. People act so shocked about a relationship. Kai and I…what we have is the same as any other couple isn’t it?

We kiss. We hold hands. We make out. We hang out more than we probably should, though we did that before we started dating. We like one another, actually he loves me and I like him. It’s the same thing but everyone is acting as if Kai is a foreign species, an alien and we’re dating.

What’s so damn weird about it!

…wait a second. Didn’t I just counter every argument I’ve ever made by saying that? Damn it! When Kai and I first started going out didn’t I say it was weird because we were both guys? Yet now that others are learning of it and asking questions I suddenly think it’s normal.

Did I bump my head? Maybe smoke some pot or something this morning? My opinion just did a complete 180 without my say so!

Then again…this is a good thing, right? I’m finally coming to terms with the fact that…yes, Kai and I are dating. We’re a couple, an item, boyfriends. Fuck, that word doesn’t sound as weird to me anymore. I guess I really did hit my head…or maybe it was Kai.

That bastard probably did it in hopes to make me admit all this to myself. That little shit! I’ll kick his ass.

“So who the hell told you that nonsense?” Though it isn’t nonsense. Not at all.

Penelope’s friends are practically right next to me now. I guess they thought since I haven’t blown a top yet they could get closer. “I heard it from Brook but I think I remember her saying that Ed saw the two of you over the weekend making out or something.”

Rumors, oh really. Ed makes me feel mature, which is pretty bad since I sound like a second grader with a potty mouth.

I open my mouth to say something, I’m not sure what because Kai interrupts me before I answer, “Ed is a boorish, lethargic oaf with the attention span of a goldfish. Why would anyone take in the ridiculous words that spew from his lips?”

Penelope isn’t the only one staring back at Kai in shock. Did he just willingly speak to a girl…without stuttering? Damn now I know I hit my head. Hit might be an understatement. I think someone beat me last night with a sledge hammer. That’s the only logical explanation.

Kai, though he spoke with such authority in his voice, is shaking behind me. His hand ghosts mine for a moment and I feel the sweat forming. His eyes show how nervous he is though he uses the length of his hair to shield them. Penelope, still awestruck from hearing Kai speak, stutters to form a coherent sentence.

Kai takes her shock to continue. “Shiloh and I are dear friends and nothing more so please refrain from asking us about things that will only add to your trivial gossip.”

Penelope scowls and after a couple moments finally turns away announcing to her group of friends that they’re leaving. Once gone, Kai sighs like he was bearing the weight of the world on his shoulders and returns to his blundering self…but as he’s talking to me about something I can’t help but notice the burning sensation in my stomach.

What is it? This feeling that’s eating away at me? I know what it is but I don’t know why I’m feeling it.

It’s anger.

But I’m not angry at Penelope, no and I’m not angry at Ed. I shouldn’t say that, I am angry at the both of them but they’re not the only ones I’m angry with. As I look back at Kai, who is now watching me curiously probably because I appear to be in thought, which I am I feel that anger.

I bite my lip and narrow my eyes on him. He notices this and asks, “S-Shiloh…what’s wrong?”

What is wrong? That’s a perfectly good question. Why the hell am I mad at him? I try to think it over. Is it because he told Penelope that he and I are just “dear friends”? Isn’t that what I wanted everyone to believe? But I really hated hearing it from him.

I hated hearing him tell her that we’re just friends. We aren’t just friends. We’re more than that. I’m being such a hypocrite though, getting mad at him for saying that when we both know I would have said the same thing…

Right?