Beneath the Northern Lights

Ali was quiet as they got ready. She didn’t tell Zacky of what she heard. She tried her best to make the best of her time with Zacky. Obviously he must care a lot about her if he decided to make this trip for her. She looked at herself in the mirror as she curled her hair a bit more. She looked to the side of the reflection and saw Zacky on his phone. The worst came to her mind as she watched him punch away at the keys. She put on some hair spray and then went and slipped into her heels. She looked back to see Zacky still typing. She walked over and slipped the phone out of his hands and sat in his lap.



“So what is more important than me in this moment?” Ali looked at the phone as Zacky tried to fight for possession of it again. She smiled seeing Brian/Syn at the top of the screen. She sighed and gave his phone back to him.



“You know he’s not more important, but he’s a close second.” Zacky smiled and went back to texting. Ali smiled as she finished getting ready. Maybe Lauri and Bam had just completely brainwashed her to think that Zacky was a liar and a cheater. Maybe he wasn’t at all. She still felt a huge knot in her stomach from finding out that all of Lauri’s past movements were all staged. She would have liked to think that he was someone she could trust. She would also like to think that the feelings they shared last night were real. However, they weren’t. Ali held onto the fact that Zacky was here and he would help her get back on track. He travelled all the way here for her and her alone; not because he had to, but because he wanted to. Ali and Zacky made their way to the restaurant where they all planned to meet tonight. They pulled in about 10 minutes after everyone else was scheduled to arrive. Zacky took his girlfriend’s hand and held it tightly.



“I want you to know that I love you more than anything, Ali. Never forget it.” Ali nodded in response and then leaned in as Zacky offered a passionate kiss before entering the restaurant. Ali walked in proudly with a tight grip around one of Zacky’s arms. As they entered their private room, Ali froze in shock. There were so many people. In the middle were two empty seats between Linde and Adam Lambert. Seats obviously saved for Ali and Zacky. Sauli, Lauri, Bam, Ryan and Nicole took up one end of the table. The other end of the table included the rest of the band members of HIM. Ali greeted as many people as possible before she sat down. Once seated she looked up and made eye contact with Lauri. Her heart broke and she looked away instantly. Why did he come? This bothered Ali a lot. She cuddled in Adam’s side and thanked him and Sauli for coming.



“What is this all about, girlie? Quite the crowd you have gathered up here!” Adam whispered as Ali looked over the menu. Ali looked up at him and shook her head, 


“I wish I knew....Very strange demographics if you ask me. I feel like tonight America and Finland will be the nations that spark the next world war.” Ali whispered as she looked at Ville’s angry expressions towards Zacky. Bam and Lauri sat whispering which didn’t calm Ali at all. “As far as I know, Zacky just wanted to get everyone together. Maybe this is his olive branch.” Adam shook his head seeing the possibility in Ali’s words.



“Most of the time you extend an olive branch in a very low tense situation. Not when your enemies have you surrounded.” Adam pointed out and then called the waiter for another cocktail. Ali sat straight and looked around at the table. It was a very peculiar company that they were in, but in another light, everyone at that table was someone that Ali loved very much. Even though most of them didn’t like each other.

Lauri and Ali caught each other’s eyes most of the night. It was making Lauri absolutely crazy. The way her lipstick looked tonight, the way her hair was done up, the way she looked at him so many times as if to say, ‘I’m still thinking of you’. Lauri was being tortured by it all.



“Tell me again why I’m here?”



“To prove that plan or no plan, you love her and will always be here for her.”



“She doesn’t feel the same, Bam. Look at the two of them. This is incredibly uncomfortable”



“Do you want her?”



“Yes...of cou........”



“Then be resilient, man!!! You can prove it to her.” Bam cut Lauri off and then patted his shoulder. Lauri looked at Bam and shook his head before sipping his beer and waited for his food. Down the table Ali sat fidgeting with her napkin as she listened to Zacky talk to Adam and others. Ali was doing her best not to look at Lauri. Finally she got so uncomfortable sitting there that she stood up and kissed Zacky’s cheek.



“I will be right back. I am going to head to the restroom.” Nicole saw Ali start to get up and she put a hand out and smiled, “I’m fine...I can go by myself” Ali said politely and fanned herself as she headed towards the bathroom. Zacky nodded and watched her for a moment before putting his attention back on Adam. Nicole wasn’t the only one who wanted to offer Ali their company. Something about the direction she was heading and her body language, just didn’t seem right. Ali walked quickly to the door of the restaurant and not the bathroom. As she reached for the door though, someone grabbed her arm and pulled her back. 



“What are you doing, Ali......” Ali turned quickly and then sighed and leaned against the wall of the restaurant in defeat and looked out the door at the people walking by and the cars whizzing down the busy Helsinki streets.



“I don’t even know. I just needed away....from the table.....from you.....” Ali looked back at the man standing next to her and tried to keep her lip from quivering. She looked back out the door and held back so many emotions. Lauri held her hand and laced his fingers with hers. He leaned his shoulder against the wall and looked out the door as well and whispered.



“You look beautiful...I’ve wanted to tell you all night.”



“You can’t save your plan, Lauri....it’s done. Give up the game.” Ali said angrily.



“This isn’t about the fucking game... it never was a game. Well...it was...a deal I had going, but it turned into more, Ali I swear. Why else do you think I would come to dinner with this asshole you call a boyfriend!!!” Lauri knew he had it coming, but the slap to his face still caught him off guard. “I’m sorry....Ali, this isn’t about me and my pride or me and my selfishness. I really just want you to be ok and I know you can do better.” Ali stood silently as she let go of Lauri’s hand.



“Part of me wants to just walk out of here and hide from everyone. My brother, my best friend, my boyfriend....you....everyone.”



“And what would you do?? Really, come on, where would you go? Just hide? Start a new life?”



“I don’t know...but at least I wouldn’t have to worry about everyone directing me towards the direction they think my life should be headed.” Ali crossed her arms. Lauri smiled; she was so angry and it was adorable, but he knew she literally was lost and it killed him inside.



“Think of all the things you’d miss out on. Ryan and Nicole’s new future. Your brothers and their lives. Your friend’s and their careers.” Lauri rubbed her back. “So much to risk just for a few moments of peace.” Ali listened carefully and then turned and looked over her shoulder to keep Lauri in the corner of her eye. “If you need to run, though,....run. Don’t let me stop you. I wouldn’t tell a soul that I saw you.” Lauri whispered and pulled his hand back. “They will miss you. I will be very sad, but at least I would know that you got what you wanted.” Lauri smiled and walked back to the table and took a seat and began to work on the dinner that had just arrived. Ali stood there. Her hands gripped the cold bar that would allow her freedom. She looked at the streets. She saw lovers, sisters, friends. She saw people who looked miserably lonely. She watched them carefully. They never looked up or smiled at anyone. Maybe they were hiding from someone just like she wanted to. They were the ones that when loading onto a bus they found a seat to themselves and never interacted with a soul. Ali thought about her dark and dreary future that her mind had just created for herself. She let go of the bar and then backed up and took a deep breath. She stood there for what must have been the longest 2 minutes. Soon she returned to the table as if nothing had taken place. Zacky asked her if she was ok. Ali simply nodded. Lauri, however, sat with a confident grin and enjoyed his dinner. He looked up at Ali every once and awhile and watched as she settled back down at the table. Maybe there was hope for Lauri. Everyone enjoyed their dinner and sat in a now quieter setting now that everyone else was eating. Ali had a lot on her mind as she ate. Zacky was having a lot of fun. He ordered beer after beer and started multiple conversations. Ali put a hand on his knee under the table as thoughts of Lauri haunted her. She wanted to know if the other had the same hauntings she did. He seemed so comfortable talking to her. Almost, as if nothing ever happened between them....or as if he knew the outcome of the story already, he had had time to accept it. She gave up on the hope that’d she ever know. That chapter they shared was closed. Especially, after what took place next.


“Thanks everyone for coming out.” Zacky called around the table. Ali sat and dropped her fork onto her plate and put her hands in her lap. She sat still for a moment before turning her head to look up at Zacky. “I know my trip out here was far from announced. I know I might have delayed some plans, and to that I apologize” Zacky looked toward’s Bam and Ville. Ville nodded politely as to accept his new guest’s apology. Bam, however, sat emotionless and unentertained. Zacky smiled and looked back at the guests and smiled. “But...I thought this would be the opportune time to share some thoughts and feelings with such good company.” Ali looked around for any foreshadowing as to what was about to happen. She nervously looked up at Zacky just in time to see his hands reaching for hers. She blushed lightly and turned in her seat and stared into his eyes.



“Zack...” She was shushed as Zacky continued his speech.



“Ali, I know I have not been the best boyfriend at times. I know I often leave you doubting and I can’t even be with you as much as I desire. I hope that you know that regardless of time and other roadblocks, my love for you has always stayed strong. Even when we face controversy, rumors, or.....lack of support,” Zacky paused and looked back at Bam with a smirk, “nothing will ever change how I feel about you.” Ali smiled and let her head fall as she smiled widely. She looked up at him and felt her heart growing and beating solely for the man in front of her. Adam and Sauli were now embracing each other taking in the scene in front of them, enjoying the love and passion radiating from their friends. Most people were very touched, however, one person was not dealing well with the scene. Lauri sat staring at his lap. Ali was giving herself over too easily after all of her doubts that she had shared with Lauri. Zacky was putting on the best performance of his life, in Lauri’s opinion; Bam would have agreed. This time, though, he left the guitar at home. Lauri cringed as the guitarist carried on. “We’ve been together for over a year. The best year of my life. We even are home owners now.” Ali laughed in excitement. “In the future I want to be pet owners, parents, business partners and so much more.” Zacky paused and moved the chair out of his way. “But before all of that will happen...I would love to be able to call you my wife.” Zacky fell to one knee and reached in his pocket. By now, a mix of emotions were being felt. Emotions on both ends of the spectrum were being felt. Ali sat with a tiny hand over her mouth and tear ducts heavily at work. “Ali Marie Margera....will you marry me?” Zacky asked and pressed his lips together as even he waited for an answer nervously. The dinner guests all had varying opinions as to how they thought she would answer. Nicole knew in a few moments her best friend would be engaged. However, Ville knew Zacky might as well just leave and let him pick up the bill. It wasn’t going to end well in Mr. Valo’s opinion. Lauri sat there looking at the ring and then up at Ali. He had no idea what she would say, but either way it was going to hurt. He knew his chance was gone with Ali. Even if she said no, She wouldn’t come running to Lauri. That was clear. Adam and Sauli sat nervously, literally holding their breaths. There eyes were huge as they looked at the glamour of the ring. Bam sat angrily. An emotionless expression sat on his face. At this moment in time, he wasn’t surprised by her answer, but now the guilt fell onto his shoulders. He had failed as her brother. He tried so hard to make her happy and set her on a freer path. Bam nor Lauri ever heard her respond. Instead the sight of Zacky slipping the ring on her finger, was enough proof that they had lost this one.

What happened next was a blur for everyone. Alcohol and emotions blurred lines and muddied the atmosphere. A trip to the ice bar was next in order to celebrate. However, the dinner guest thinned after that transitions. Ville took his boys home. Nicole and Ryan spent a few moments at the bar celebrating with the newly engaged couple before leaving. Bam brought Lauri along and they sat in the corner not saying much at all, but just grieving in silence with each other. Adam and Sauli ripped up the dance floor next to Ali and Zacky. It was just the happiest time for Ali. She knew that all of her worries were caused by her own fears. They were all gone now. Zacky showed that this is what he wants. Her love life was as stable as it had ever been. The feeling of relief filled her soul, and doubts and regrets rolled off her shoulders like water off her wings. She spent the night dancing and drinking with her favorite people, at least the ones that felt like celebrating. As if it were a game, though, Lauri sat there staring at his cocktail. He moved the straw around. He may not have picked the shortest straw. No, certainly not, there were others who had involuntarily picked a worse fate. Bam had to go home and be reminded of Ali’s decision for the rest of his life. He’d always have to be related, by marriage, to Zacky. He’d see him for all of those family gatherings. Lauri would just be an opportunity short. He would never be able to see what could have been. There were simply no more straws to pull.