Living in a Broken Dream
Too Much To Handle
Anna’s POV
The weekend! I love weekends because they give me chance to catch up on any school work I need to but by some miracle *cough* Alex *cough* everything was finished so I sat in the living room with my sisters who had homework
“Anna, where’s the glue?” asks Tammie
“In the cupboard” I say as Eva attempts her math homework
“Hey Anna, we have some news for you” says Ben as he comes to sit at the table
“Oh?” I ask with wide eyes
“Well Liz and I have a business meeting and we will be gone for the week” he says
“What?” I ask slightly annoyed
“It’s the only time we can go, seeing that Liz will be off soon for maternity leave”
I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose “Teddy’s gonna be here, right?” I ask looking up
He was quiet and looked down
“Right?” I ask again
“No, he’s off to look at his college” says Ben
“What the Hell Ben! How am I gonna look after all the kids on my own?” I fume as I stand up
“I get that your upset Anna-” he starts
“No! I am not upset, I am angry” I say as I march out the front door
“Anna! Where are you going?” he shouts
“Out!” I hiss back at him. I march around and find myself at the beach, a place I hadn’t been to yet. No one was here today because the sun wasn’t out and it was raining. I shivered and cursed myself at the fact I left my jacket at home. I walked further onto the beach and sat just off of the grass on a hill, the sound of the waves in the background slowly helping me to relax and the gentle drips of rain. I sat there and ignored my phone, even when Alex rang me. I sat there and thought about my Mom, she’d tell me what to do right now, heck if it wasn’t for her right now we’d still be living in Minnesota! ‘What am I thinking?’ I ask myself. It wasn’t her fault; it was no one’s fault! Why did I think so badly of her?
“I'm sorry Mom” I say out loud as if she was there “I didn’t mean to say that, that was so bad of me. I just feel like there is so much to do at once and it’s dragging me down” I look out to the sea and watch the seagulls diving
“I miss you” I say out loud.
“ANNA” I turn around and see a worried Alex walking towards me.
“Hey Alex” I say as I sit and watch the waves again
“What are you doing here?” he asks as he sits next to me.
“Thinking” I say watching the waves role onto shore.
“Okay then, explain something to me. Why is it that your sister rang me up crying because she doesn’t know where you are?” he asks with a hint of anger in his voice
I look down and think about what he just said
“I can’t do it anymore” I say as I dig the palms of my hands into my eyes
“What’s happened?” he asks calmer then before
“I. Cant. Do. It. Anymore” I stress as I push my palms deeper until I start to see stars and breathing heavy, to stop myself crying. I hate crying and I tend to do it if the circumstances hurt me or I need to, now was not the time.
“Anna, talk to me” he says softly as he sits in front of me, grabbing my hands and bringing them down
“It’s too much for me to handle. Everyone is depending on me. Everyone acts so normal, I have to act like everything is normal. They walk all over me. I am tired of having to act like I am okay, when I am not” I say through clenched teeth
“What's happened?”he asks
“I have to look after all those kids on my own because they are leaving me” I say drawing patterns in the sand. I look up to him for the first time and see his eyes full of concern and worry under his hoodie. He brushes my soaking wet hair behind my ear and watches me closely
“Why does everyone leave me Alex?” I ask. His eyes soften and he pulls me into a tight hug rocking me back and forth.
“I'm going nowhere Anna” he whispers into my damp shoulder
“Promise?” I ask
“I promise” he says looking me in the eye. “Lets get you home” He helps me up and puts his arm around my waist and pulls me into him to keep me warm. I look up and see a bruise around his fingers
“What did you do?” I ask holding them
“Trapped them in a door” he says, quickly pulling them away
“Oh” I say looking down
“Hey” he stops and pulls my face up with his finger “don't scare everyone like that again okay?”
“Okay” I say with a small smile
“Jack was so worried. He’s gonna be pissed” he says
“Aw man!” I say hitting my head
“Don't worry about it” he says. He opens up his car and drives me back home where Teddy’s waiting with a worried face
“Anna!” he shouts as he pulls me into a hug
“Hey Ted” I say quietly into his shoulder
“I'm sorry that my dad told you this late, and I just found out about the college thing this morning” he says pulling away and looking at me through his shaggy hair
“Its okay Teddy” I say
He pulled me into a tight hug and says “You worried me, I ran after you but couldn’t find you, then I told dad off because I told him he should have told you earlier”
“Its fine Ted” I laugh
“Thanks for finding her Alex” says Teddy and he shakes Alex’s hand.
“Its fine”
“I’ll help out whenever you want! In fact, I will look after everyone this afternoon, go to Alex’s” he says shooing me
“Wait!” I shout “I need to see Eva”
I walk into the pink bedroom and saw my sister asleep on her bed, looking smaller then she actually was. I look down at my sister and see the tear marks down her face. I feel bad and decide to tell her what happened
“Eva” I whisper. She opens her eyes and she pulls me into a hug, crying softly.
“Don't leave like dad did” she says
“I'm not gonna leave like he did, I just needed a break”
“Okay, but don't get angry like that again” she says as she sniffs and wipes her nose
“Be good for Teddy okay, I’ll see you later” I say kissing her forehead
“Bye Anna” she says as she gives me a quick hug.
I sat with Alex on the red leather sofa while I waited to get shouted at by Jack.
“I wish he would hurry up” I mumble as we wait for him and soon enough a worried Jack runs through the front door and grabs me into a tight hug.
“What the HELL where you thinking?” he shouts
“I'm sorry Jack” I say, feeling a lump in the back of my throat at the worried look on my best friends face
“You had me worried and anything could have happened” he says
“I'm sorry Jack” I mumble as I hold him tighter to me.
“Are you okay?” he whispers so that only I can hear
“Sometimes” I whisper back “But It’s getting better”
“Good, I like you as my best friend” he says normally
“Well if that' how its gonna be Jack” says Alex as he storms into the kitchen
“Alex, baby, I'm sorry” he says imitating a new York accent
I laugh as Jack lets go of me, kisses my head and runs after Alex.
The weekend! I love weekends because they give me chance to catch up on any school work I need to but by some miracle *cough* Alex *cough* everything was finished so I sat in the living room with my sisters who had homework
“Anna, where’s the glue?” asks Tammie
“In the cupboard” I say as Eva attempts her math homework
“Hey Anna, we have some news for you” says Ben as he comes to sit at the table
“Oh?” I ask with wide eyes
“Well Liz and I have a business meeting and we will be gone for the week” he says
“What?” I ask slightly annoyed
“It’s the only time we can go, seeing that Liz will be off soon for maternity leave”
I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose “Teddy’s gonna be here, right?” I ask looking up
He was quiet and looked down
“Right?” I ask again
“No, he’s off to look at his college” says Ben
“What the Hell Ben! How am I gonna look after all the kids on my own?” I fume as I stand up
“I get that your upset Anna-” he starts
“No! I am not upset, I am angry” I say as I march out the front door
“Anna! Where are you going?” he shouts
“Out!” I hiss back at him. I march around and find myself at the beach, a place I hadn’t been to yet. No one was here today because the sun wasn’t out and it was raining. I shivered and cursed myself at the fact I left my jacket at home. I walked further onto the beach and sat just off of the grass on a hill, the sound of the waves in the background slowly helping me to relax and the gentle drips of rain. I sat there and ignored my phone, even when Alex rang me. I sat there and thought about my Mom, she’d tell me what to do right now, heck if it wasn’t for her right now we’d still be living in Minnesota! ‘What am I thinking?’ I ask myself. It wasn’t her fault; it was no one’s fault! Why did I think so badly of her?
“I'm sorry Mom” I say out loud as if she was there “I didn’t mean to say that, that was so bad of me. I just feel like there is so much to do at once and it’s dragging me down” I look out to the sea and watch the seagulls diving
“I miss you” I say out loud.
“ANNA” I turn around and see a worried Alex walking towards me.
“Hey Alex” I say as I sit and watch the waves again
“What are you doing here?” he asks as he sits next to me.
“Thinking” I say watching the waves role onto shore.
“Okay then, explain something to me. Why is it that your sister rang me up crying because she doesn’t know where you are?” he asks with a hint of anger in his voice
I look down and think about what he just said
“I can’t do it anymore” I say as I dig the palms of my hands into my eyes
“What’s happened?” he asks calmer then before
“I. Cant. Do. It. Anymore” I stress as I push my palms deeper until I start to see stars and breathing heavy, to stop myself crying. I hate crying and I tend to do it if the circumstances hurt me or I need to, now was not the time.
“Anna, talk to me” he says softly as he sits in front of me, grabbing my hands and bringing them down
“It’s too much for me to handle. Everyone is depending on me. Everyone acts so normal, I have to act like everything is normal. They walk all over me. I am tired of having to act like I am okay, when I am not” I say through clenched teeth
“What's happened?”he asks
“I have to look after all those kids on my own because they are leaving me” I say drawing patterns in the sand. I look up to him for the first time and see his eyes full of concern and worry under his hoodie. He brushes my soaking wet hair behind my ear and watches me closely
“Why does everyone leave me Alex?” I ask. His eyes soften and he pulls me into a tight hug rocking me back and forth.
“I'm going nowhere Anna” he whispers into my damp shoulder
“Promise?” I ask
“I promise” he says looking me in the eye. “Lets get you home” He helps me up and puts his arm around my waist and pulls me into him to keep me warm. I look up and see a bruise around his fingers
“What did you do?” I ask holding them
“Trapped them in a door” he says, quickly pulling them away
“Oh” I say looking down
“Hey” he stops and pulls my face up with his finger “don't scare everyone like that again okay?”
“Okay” I say with a small smile
“Jack was so worried. He’s gonna be pissed” he says
“Aw man!” I say hitting my head
“Don't worry about it” he says. He opens up his car and drives me back home where Teddy’s waiting with a worried face
“Anna!” he shouts as he pulls me into a hug
“Hey Ted” I say quietly into his shoulder
“I'm sorry that my dad told you this late, and I just found out about the college thing this morning” he says pulling away and looking at me through his shaggy hair
“Its okay Teddy” I say
He pulled me into a tight hug and says “You worried me, I ran after you but couldn’t find you, then I told dad off because I told him he should have told you earlier”
“Its fine Ted” I laugh
“Thanks for finding her Alex” says Teddy and he shakes Alex’s hand.
“Its fine”
“I’ll help out whenever you want! In fact, I will look after everyone this afternoon, go to Alex’s” he says shooing me
“Wait!” I shout “I need to see Eva”
I walk into the pink bedroom and saw my sister asleep on her bed, looking smaller then she actually was. I look down at my sister and see the tear marks down her face. I feel bad and decide to tell her what happened
“Eva” I whisper. She opens her eyes and she pulls me into a hug, crying softly.
“Don't leave like dad did” she says
“I'm not gonna leave like he did, I just needed a break”
“Okay, but don't get angry like that again” she says as she sniffs and wipes her nose
“Be good for Teddy okay, I’ll see you later” I say kissing her forehead
“Bye Anna” she says as she gives me a quick hug.
I sat with Alex on the red leather sofa while I waited to get shouted at by Jack.
“I wish he would hurry up” I mumble as we wait for him and soon enough a worried Jack runs through the front door and grabs me into a tight hug.
“What the HELL where you thinking?” he shouts
“I'm sorry Jack” I say, feeling a lump in the back of my throat at the worried look on my best friends face
“You had me worried and anything could have happened” he says
“I'm sorry Jack” I mumble as I hold him tighter to me.
“Are you okay?” he whispers so that only I can hear
“Sometimes” I whisper back “But It’s getting better”
“Good, I like you as my best friend” he says normally
“Well if that' how its gonna be Jack” says Alex as he storms into the kitchen
“Alex, baby, I'm sorry” he says imitating a new York accent
I laugh as Jack lets go of me, kisses my head and runs after Alex.