Living in a Broken Dream
Anna Tells Jack
My lip quivered and my eyes stared to water over. At that moment Jack’s eyes widened even more then they were already. He pulled me into a hug and whispered in my ear
“I'm sorry”
I smiled into his shoulder and pulled away. I wiped my eyes and made my way towards the kitchen door to close it. I learned against it and sighed, after a moment I went the fridge and pulled out the peanut butter. I sat opposite Jack at the kitchen worktop. I opened the jar, took a teaspoon and lifted it to my mouth. I looked up and saw Jack’s face pulling one of disgust.
“Now I know why you and Em get on so well”
I chuckled and sighed again. I thought for a moment about how to tell Jack what happened.
“Jack, I'm gonna tell you what happened under one condition”
He nodded “What?”
“You must promise not to tell anybody, and not to give me a look of sympathy once I’ve finished okay?”
“I promise”
I got myself comfy on the chair and looked him straight in the eye.
Jacks POV
She got comfortable on her chair and looked my straight in the eye. I could tell that she was anticipating how I would react.
“Well, when I was eleven, my dad ran off with some woman. My mom looked after 5 kids on her own”
She paused for a moment, while I tried to figure out who were her brothers and sisters. I guess the look on my face must have given me away as she gave a slight chuckle and said
“Tammie, Luke and Eva are my brothers and sisters. We also have a brother called Sidney but he’s in college. Evelyn, Lottie and Teddy are my cousins”
I nodded my head, saying that I understood and for her to continue
“Well a few years later, when I had just turned 15, mom collapsed at work. We went to the hospital and the doctor said that she had a rare form of cancer”
Her voice wavered when she said this, so I moved round the table to give her a one armed hug. She had some more peanut butter and carried on
“She started with the chemotherapy and it started to work, but then she was back in hospital again on Christmas Eve”
She paused for a moment
“The cancer had spread around her body. She stayed in the hospital overnight, and at 6:44pm on Christmas Day, she died”
Then she started crying. I pulled her into a hug and shhhhed her, calming her down. I did this with Emily a few times, put they would be over little things like when she saw the homeless people on the TV, or at the end of the notebook. I’d never sat holding someone while they cried over a dead relative, never mind their Mom. She calmed down after a while
“That's why I look after all these kids. Teddy got a job, Liz and Ben come home late from work and my Moms Dead!” she crocked
“I have to play Mom, all the time and it’s tiring! I'm passing school by the skin of my teeth, and I know that when we finish school, I can’t go to college because I’ll know that I’ll be needed here. And to top in all off Liz and Ben are having another baby in like 9 months!” she cried. Now I know that I haven’t known Anna long but I knew that she was strong. I think I was witnessing a minor breakdown. I’d seen it on the show that Em watches on MTV sometimes. Her crying finally stopped and I felt I had to say something.
I put my hands on her shoulder and watched her,
“I'm sorry about your Mom Anna. I am so sorry. No one should have to go through with that loss at such a young age. You are so brave because, I don't think, no wait, I know I couldn’t look after 5 kids on my own, you’re so strong. I know that you may think you’re not but believe me you so are. You’re determined to make sure that each of those kids is treated equally and fairly, and that they will do great in life. I gotta say Anna; they are doing fantastic now, so when they’re older, they could take over the world”
She gave me a watery smile and pulled me into a tight hug. I hugged her back until we both let go.
“And if you ever need any help. They guys and Em will be here for you” she smiled at me and ate some more peanut butter.
“Thanks Jack. I never knew you had a serious side” she sniffed.
I laughed and ruffled her hair up earning a grunt from her.
“I know Anna Banana, I even surprised myself then!” she laughed again then said
“You know on Wednesdays, when Emily goes to work?” she questioned looking away from me
“Yeah?”
“Well....erm...that’s her day off and she offered to help me”
“She knows too?” I asked
Anna nodded making her fringe fall in her face
“And this is where she disappears, with you?” I said mock angry
She timidly smiled and gave her head a slight nod
“That's Fine Anna! Gosh, did you think I would yell at you” I shoved her with my shoulder. She was about to reply when a hyped up Luke jumped up onto Anna’s Lap
“ANNA!” he yelled giving her a kiss on the cheek.
“Hey Luke” she said straightening his t-shirt.
“What are we having dinner?” he said playing with her necklace.
“Hmm I don't know” she said talking down to the little boy.
“CAN WE HAVE MAC AND CHEESE?” shouted the boy.
Anna gave him a raised eyebrow and he quickly added
“Please” he said drawing out the ‘e’ and giving Anna a wide smile.
“I don't know” she said, playing with him.
“Please Anna, Please....Jack want Mac and cheese too! Don’tcha Jack?” begged the boy looking at me with big brown eyes. I just noticed all of Anna’s brothers and sisters had brown eyes, whereas her cousins had green. Ha, I know family from family!
“Jack?” asked Luke.
“Yeah, Mac and cheese would be awesome”
“Yeah, Awesome” repeated Luke, trying to remember the word.
“It would be awesome would it?” asked Anna.
“Yeah, if Jack says it’s awesome, then it is!” I think my heart swelled a bit at that.
“.............fine! Mac and cheese it is” said Anna. Luke jumped to me and gave me a hug.
“Yay, Mac and cheese Jack!” and with that he jumped down and ran out the kitchen to tell the rest of the family the news. After he’d shouted it again we heard a chorus of
“Mac and Cheese! Yeah!”
Anna laughed and got up to make dinner. She was about to say something when Luke ran in the kitchen again, standing in front of me.
“Are you staying for dinner Jack?” asked Luke. I looked at Anna who nodded at me, saying I could.
“Yeah, I am”
“Yeah!” Anna laughed and went to the fridge to get ingredients.
“Guess what Jack?”
“What!”
“You’re pretty awesome!” and with that he took off.
“I'm sorry”
I smiled into his shoulder and pulled away. I wiped my eyes and made my way towards the kitchen door to close it. I learned against it and sighed, after a moment I went the fridge and pulled out the peanut butter. I sat opposite Jack at the kitchen worktop. I opened the jar, took a teaspoon and lifted it to my mouth. I looked up and saw Jack’s face pulling one of disgust.
“Now I know why you and Em get on so well”
I chuckled and sighed again. I thought for a moment about how to tell Jack what happened.
“Jack, I'm gonna tell you what happened under one condition”
He nodded “What?”
“You must promise not to tell anybody, and not to give me a look of sympathy once I’ve finished okay?”
“I promise”
I got myself comfy on the chair and looked him straight in the eye.
Jacks POV
She got comfortable on her chair and looked my straight in the eye. I could tell that she was anticipating how I would react.
“Well, when I was eleven, my dad ran off with some woman. My mom looked after 5 kids on her own”
She paused for a moment, while I tried to figure out who were her brothers and sisters. I guess the look on my face must have given me away as she gave a slight chuckle and said
“Tammie, Luke and Eva are my brothers and sisters. We also have a brother called Sidney but he’s in college. Evelyn, Lottie and Teddy are my cousins”
I nodded my head, saying that I understood and for her to continue
“Well a few years later, when I had just turned 15, mom collapsed at work. We went to the hospital and the doctor said that she had a rare form of cancer”
Her voice wavered when she said this, so I moved round the table to give her a one armed hug. She had some more peanut butter and carried on
“She started with the chemotherapy and it started to work, but then she was back in hospital again on Christmas Eve”
She paused for a moment
“The cancer had spread around her body. She stayed in the hospital overnight, and at 6:44pm on Christmas Day, she died”
Then she started crying. I pulled her into a hug and shhhhed her, calming her down. I did this with Emily a few times, put they would be over little things like when she saw the homeless people on the TV, or at the end of the notebook. I’d never sat holding someone while they cried over a dead relative, never mind their Mom. She calmed down after a while
“That's why I look after all these kids. Teddy got a job, Liz and Ben come home late from work and my Moms Dead!” she crocked
“I have to play Mom, all the time and it’s tiring! I'm passing school by the skin of my teeth, and I know that when we finish school, I can’t go to college because I’ll know that I’ll be needed here. And to top in all off Liz and Ben are having another baby in like 9 months!” she cried. Now I know that I haven’t known Anna long but I knew that she was strong. I think I was witnessing a minor breakdown. I’d seen it on the show that Em watches on MTV sometimes. Her crying finally stopped and I felt I had to say something.
I put my hands on her shoulder and watched her,
“I'm sorry about your Mom Anna. I am so sorry. No one should have to go through with that loss at such a young age. You are so brave because, I don't think, no wait, I know I couldn’t look after 5 kids on my own, you’re so strong. I know that you may think you’re not but believe me you so are. You’re determined to make sure that each of those kids is treated equally and fairly, and that they will do great in life. I gotta say Anna; they are doing fantastic now, so when they’re older, they could take over the world”
She gave me a watery smile and pulled me into a tight hug. I hugged her back until we both let go.
“And if you ever need any help. They guys and Em will be here for you” she smiled at me and ate some more peanut butter.
“Thanks Jack. I never knew you had a serious side” she sniffed.
I laughed and ruffled her hair up earning a grunt from her.
“I know Anna Banana, I even surprised myself then!” she laughed again then said
“You know on Wednesdays, when Emily goes to work?” she questioned looking away from me
“Yeah?”
“Well....erm...that’s her day off and she offered to help me”
“She knows too?” I asked
Anna nodded making her fringe fall in her face
“And this is where she disappears, with you?” I said mock angry
She timidly smiled and gave her head a slight nod
“That's Fine Anna! Gosh, did you think I would yell at you” I shoved her with my shoulder. She was about to reply when a hyped up Luke jumped up onto Anna’s Lap
“ANNA!” he yelled giving her a kiss on the cheek.
“Hey Luke” she said straightening his t-shirt.
“What are we having dinner?” he said playing with her necklace.
“Hmm I don't know” she said talking down to the little boy.
“CAN WE HAVE MAC AND CHEESE?” shouted the boy.
Anna gave him a raised eyebrow and he quickly added
“Please” he said drawing out the ‘e’ and giving Anna a wide smile.
“I don't know” she said, playing with him.
“Please Anna, Please....Jack want Mac and cheese too! Don’tcha Jack?” begged the boy looking at me with big brown eyes. I just noticed all of Anna’s brothers and sisters had brown eyes, whereas her cousins had green. Ha, I know family from family!
“Jack?” asked Luke.
“Yeah, Mac and cheese would be awesome”
“Yeah, Awesome” repeated Luke, trying to remember the word.
“It would be awesome would it?” asked Anna.
“Yeah, if Jack says it’s awesome, then it is!” I think my heart swelled a bit at that.
“.............fine! Mac and cheese it is” said Anna. Luke jumped to me and gave me a hug.
“Yay, Mac and cheese Jack!” and with that he jumped down and ran out the kitchen to tell the rest of the family the news. After he’d shouted it again we heard a chorus of
“Mac and Cheese! Yeah!”
Anna laughed and got up to make dinner. She was about to say something when Luke ran in the kitchen again, standing in front of me.
“Are you staying for dinner Jack?” asked Luke. I looked at Anna who nodded at me, saying I could.
“Yeah, I am”
“Yeah!” Anna laughed and went to the fridge to get ingredients.
“Guess what Jack?”
“What!”
“You’re pretty awesome!” and with that he took off.