I Can't Believe, I'm Actually Meant to Be Here!

Ronnie and I laid awake in the bed, neither one of us wanting to get up and face the day after what had happened last night.

"Are you upset?" He mumbled into my neck. He was laying on his side facing me, and had his arms wrapped around my waist.

"A little, as much as I hate to admit it." I smiled when I felt his lips on my neck, trying to comfort me. "I'll get over it. I did before."

"But now he knows we live here in LA." He lifted his head up and looked at me. "He's gonna try to find us."

"He just needs to give it up. He'll figure that out sooner or later when I get a restraining order against him if he finds out where I live." I pushed his hair out of his eyes and he frowned a little. "This is all my fault."

"Ronnie, don't say that." He sighed and flopped on his back, looking up at the ceiling. "It is. If I hadn't made you choose who to side with, you'd still have your brother. I should've just understood that he's the only family you have...I took that away from you." I bit the inside of my cheek. I wanted to tell him he was wrong, that it wasn't his fault, but in reality he was telling the truth.

"He shouldn't have gotten so pissed off about it, though."

"He had a right to, Scar. I took his sister away from him." I frowned at the slight angry tone in Ronnie's voice. "I just like to fuck everything up for people. That's all I ever liked to do since I was born."

"Ronnie, stop. You know that's not true..." I turned on my side and lightly touched his arm.

"Yeah, it is. I fuck every single thing up. Shit, I made my own mother abandon my dad and brothers." I shook my head quickly, feeling the pain wash over me. "Ronnie, do not even say that. That was not your fault-"

"I made everything a living hell for my dad, Scarlet. I made the woman he loved run away, because she didn't want me. I made him raise 3 boys on his own. I became a fucked-up drug addict. I made my brother become a fucked-up drug addict. I went to prison. Yeah, he's sooo proud of me. I'm a wonderful son."

I wanted to cry at the venom, sarcasm, and hurt in his voice. I wanted to punch his mother right in the face, because I knew she made him like this. She made him feel all of this pain, every day. She made him think all of this.

"Look at me." I whispered shakily. I reached out and gently turned his head so he would face me. His eyes scanned my face. "None of that was your fault, and you know it. You don't even know how proud of you your dad is, and how much he loves you. You're his baby boy, he considers you his prized possession." His eyebrow quirked up a bit, his mouth twitching slightly into a smile. "How do you know?"

"He's told me." Shock filled his eyes and I smiled. "He's never told me that."

"He's your dad. He probably finds it awkward to tell you that." We both laughed slightly. "And you know how proud I am of you. All of us are proud of you. Your family's proud of you. Your friends are proud of you. The fans are proud of you. And hell, I'll even go as far to say that the bitch that gave birth to you is probably proud of you," His eyes looked down at the sheets, that small smile still on his face.

"And that cunt leaving her family had nothing to do with you. She didn't realize what she'd left when she did. And I know she regrets it, and it eats away at her every single day, and she wants to probably kill herself over it, if she hasn't already."

"You always know how to make me feel better." I laughed as he buried his face away in my neck again, his arms going around my waist and pulling me as close as possible to him.

"We don't need anyone but each other." He murmured into my neck. I smiled softly and played with his hair. "And your mommy and my daddy. And the band." I laughed and felt him grin against my skin.

"But other than that, we just need each other." I joked.

"That's right." He lifted his head again and pressed his lips to mine, making me smile.

$$$

I looked up at the sign, making sure I had the right place. I opened the door and walked in, smiling at the girl at the desk.

"Hi! How can I help you hun?" I grinned at her bubbly attitude and appearance; long black hair with purple and blue mixed in, two full sleeves of tattoos and piercings adorning her face.

"I was wondering if I could just do a walk in tattoo? It's really small, only a letter on my finger." She smiled and nodded. "Yep, lemme go get Chris." I nodded and let her walk off and find the tattooist that would be working on me today.

She brought him back and he waved at me. "I'm Chris." I smiled and shook his hand. "Scarlet."

"Pretty name." The girl smiled. I thanked her. "So what can I do for ya today?" Chris asked.

"I want the letter "R" on my ring finger." I held up my hand and he nodded. "Okay...any particular font?"

"Mmm, just a nice cursive-type font, I guess." He smiled and nodded. "Well come on back to my station with me, it won't take me but a few minutes to draw a stencil." I nodded and followed him back to his tattoo station, taking a seat.

"So on the ring finger, eh?" He asked while drawing the tattoo. I giggled and nodded. "Must be for someone special?" He glanced at me and smiled. "My boyfriend."

"How long you two been going?" I bit my tongue. "2 days." He immediately stopped drawing and stared at me, making me bust out laughing. "But we've known each other for 12 years, we just finally decided to try it out and start dating."

"Oh, JESUS!" He fell back in his chair and put a hand over his heart. "I was about to give you the "Getting your new boyfriend's name tattooed on you because you're sooo in love with him and you've been together for a week" lecture." He laughed.

"I'm not one of those girls, don't worry." I chuckled. He returned to drawing my tattoo, nearly finished. "I just never thought I'd actually be doing this...hell, I never thought I would actually date him. The guy was like my brother." Chris finished the stencil and laughed. "Must be weird fucking the guy you considered your brother."

"Okay, I heard the words, "fucking", and "your brother", so I decided now would be the time to butt in." The girl came over from the desk with a confused and slightly amused expression on her face. "I'm getting my boyfriend's first initial tattooed, and I was telling Chris how I never thought I'd date him because he was always like a brother to me." I laughed, She wiped her forehead. "PHEW! That was about to get weird."

"Indeed it was." Chris chuckled, carefully transferring the stencil onto the top of my ring finger. "Like it?"

"Love it." I told him as I looked down at it. He smiled and got his supplies ready.

"How long have you known him? 12 years?" The girl asked, who's name tag read "Lacy". I nodded. "Yep."

"And what made you finally want to start dating him?" Chris asked as he started tattooing my finger. I made a face from the pain and Lacy giggled. "Well, he kept bothering me about it...he was very persistent...so were his friends..." The two laughed and I smirked. "So I was basically forced into this relationship." I joked.

"Did you like...not want to be with him?" Lacy asked. I shook my head. "Not at first. Like I said, known the guy forever; I've seen how he treated his past girlfriends. Plus, he had a drug problem...a really bad drug problem."

"How bad are we talking?" Chris asked, glancing up at me.

"I'm talking got him sent to prison for 2 and a half years bad." He stopped tattooing, and they both stared at me, shocked. I smiled sadly and nodded.

"For drugs?" Lacy asked. I shook my head. "5 years ago he went to a fight. Long story short, a kid got shot and killed at this fight, the 2 guys he brought with him to the fight didn't get charged with it, because the guy who shot him had "self-defense", and the other kid killed himself because he felt so guilty. Sooo...he was left to blame."

"When did he go to prison?"

"He wasn't arrested until 2 years after that happened, because he violated his 5 year parole sentence he had due to previous drug charges and shit. He went in 2008, he got out this past December."

"I'm guessing prison cleaned him up?" Chris asked. "If he hadn't gone there, he would've been dead." Lacy frowned. "That's how bad it was."

"Wow." Lacy smiled at me sympathetically. "So he's all good now?"

"Better than ever." I smiled. "We're all really proud of him."

"Who's we?" Chris smiled. "His friends, his family, his band and his fans."

"He's in a band?" Lacy asked. I nodded. "He used to be in a band called Escape The Fate, now he's in a band called Falling in Reverse."

".....Ronnie Radke?" Lacy's eyes widened. I laughed and nodded. "I knew the story sounded familiar!"

"I've tattooed him before. Back when ETF first started out." Chris laughed, finishing up my own tattoo. "Wow...that's crazy. I'm glad to hear he's doing good, though. And he's got a good girlfriend to keep him tamed." I laughed and shook my head. "No one can tame that man. He's insane."

"That is one thing I remember about him..." Chris stated. I giggled and looked down as he wiped down my tattoo. "Alright, you're done!" I admired my new tattoo, smiling like a crazy woman. "Is he gonna freak out over this?" Lacy asked grinning as we all stood up. I laughed. "Probably."

I got a small bandage put on my finger, and paid Chris for the tattoo. "Tell him to come in here sometime, i wanna see that fucker again and tattoo him." Chris grinned. I laughed and nodded. "For sure." I gave them both hugs and thanked them before walking out to my car.

I decided to drive around and shop a little for a couple hours, since that's what I told Ronnie I'd be doing. And plus, the bandage needed to stay on for 2 hours before it could be taken off and shown to anyone.

Finally, I was home, and I couldn't help but feel all giddy and stupid, excited to show Ronnie the tattoo.

"I'm baaaaaaaack." I sung when I walked through the door. Ronnie came walking out of the bedroom a few seconds later, smiling at me. "I see you didn't buy the whole mall, that's good." I rolled my eyes and set my bags down on the table, along with my purse. I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around his neck, leaning in and kissing him. He smiled and wrapped his arms around my waist, kissing me back.

"Mmm...I have something to show you." I murmured against his lips. I smiled as he pulled away slightly and looked at me, a curious glint in his eyes. "Okay." He smiled. I held my hand up and he looked at the bandage. "You got a papercut?" He laughed as my eyes narrowed at him.

"No, dingbat." He smirked and I carefully removed the bandaid. I held my hand up again and his eyes fixated on the tattoo. I couldn't help but giggle at the surprised look on his face, and a grin slowly formed on his lips.

"You seriously...got that for me?" I nodded, smiling. He shook his head in disbelief, still grinning like an idiot.

He told me, "I love you." before pressing his lips to mine again. I wound my arms around his neck again, his hands gripping my hips tightly. He slipped his tongue across my bottom lip and I gladly gave him entrance.

Things only got more heated from there. Soon I found myself being backed into the bedroom while still kissing him, both of our shirts discarded somewhere on the floor.

I pushed him down on the bed, and he sat up. I smirked and stood in between his legs, leaning down and cradling his face to push my lips to his again. I moaned when his hands grabbed my ass, pushing me even closer to him.

"So what was that thing you were talking about the other day," He paused and stood up, turning us around and pushing me onto the bed this time. "that you wanted to take it some-what slow and not have sex right away or whatever?" I rolled my eyes as he grinned at me, slowly climbing on top. He harshly pressed his lips to mine again and I threaded fingers through his hair, pulling it slightly.

"Hmm?" He smiled against my lips. "Remember that?"

"Shut up and fuck me."