Ready When You Are

All I wanted to do was sit.

So that’s what I did.

For the entire day after Garrett left and into this one, I sat on the chair by the window, my head hitting the pane.

It was just the click of the front door that sent my head flying up.

“Hey there.”

I forced out a smile, pulling the sweater over my knees. “Hi Bren.”

Brendan set down his guitar case and plopped himself on the couch, smiling at me and flicking on the TV. I sighed and made my eyes go back to the window.

I hadn’t seen Brendan for days, and all I got was “Hey there”. It never seemed to bother me before, but now it did.

But I couldn’t help Garrett’s words from playing in my head again and again.

”He doesn’t see you like I do.”

I cringed as the last words he said spoke through my head as if he was here now saying them again.

”I love you.”

Brendan hadn’t told me that in I don’t know how long. But I hadn’t said it either.

The thought that rang in my head next scared me more than anything.

It was that if I did tell Brendan I loved him, I would be lying.

***

Walking into the record shop, I expected three things.

One, seeing Emerson running towards me full force, ready to tell me what happened with Kenney in full detail.

Two, find Em sobbing or crying, still ready to tell me everything about what Kennedy had done.

Or three, not see Emerson at all.

What I walked into was none of those things.

On the counter in the middle of the empty store (it was a slow Wednesday night) was Emerson, smiling at Kennedy as his hands wrapped around her and they kissed. I nearly dropped my car keys and ran towards them in excitement. This could not have worked better if I tried.

“YOU GUYS!” I squealed. Darn I sounded like Em.

Em peeled her eyes away from Kenny’s and looked over at me with a huge smile on her face as her hands flew into the air.

“ARE YOU TOGETHER? WHAT HAPPENED?” I walked over to them, still yelling happily.

Kenny laughed, rubbing his neck with one hand and looking at Em with the other. Quickly, Em flashed me her hand.

I almost dropped my car keys, along with my entire jaw.

“Em, what is that?” I asked plainly. Holy hell what had they done?

Em and Kenny exchanged a glance, smiling like school girls. “WE’RE ENGAGED!” Em yelled, pulling me into a tight hug.

But I couldn’t bring my limbs to hug her back. What were they thinking? They were so young. Just a few nights ago they had hated each other. Just a few nights ago they weren’t even a couple and now they were getting married?

“What?” I got out.

Kenny smiled at me, squinting his eyes nervously. “Em and I. We’re engaged.”

I nodded. “Yeah, I uh, got that. How?”

“I proposed.” Kenny nodded.

“Uh huh.” I said. “But why?”

Em coughed a little, eyeing me. “Because we’re in love.”

I couldn’t help but laugh a little. Was this a joke?

“You guys hated each other a few nights ago-”

“We’ve always been in love, Kenley,” Em laughed, throwing her arms around Kenny’s neck, “Everybody else could see it. It just took us a little while. And now that we know for sure, why not ya know?”

I hated to say it. I hated myself for even thinking it.

But that made so much sense. John and I had been talking about it since the day I met him- they were in love. They were just too stupid to see it. And now that they did, they were doing something about it. Nothing made more sense than that.

“Don’t you think you guys are rushing a little?” I asked nervously.

“Well,” Em laughed, looking at Kenny, “we’re waiting a little while. You’re the first person we told. But with Kenny touring so much out of the year and everything, we are waiting for some down time.” Em paused for a second, looking at me. “Aren’t you happy for us, Kenley? I thought you’d be happier for us.”

I thought for a second, trying to piece together in my own mind whether I was happy for them or not. But in the end, I knew.

“Yeah, Em.” I smiled, “I’m really happy for you guys. This is great. Give me a hug!”

I hugged them both before setting my stuff down and sitting up on the counter next to Em.

“Well,” Em said, nudging me, “tell me about you and Garrett. You seemed pretty savvy in the bar the other day.”

Crap.

Again, I found myself unsure of what to tell them.

“I uh, we were.” I nodded. “But he, he told me he loved me-”

Em squealed, hugging me again as Kenny’s arm shot into the air. It was as if I had just told them we were engaged. It was going to suck telling them we were far from that. The door jingled lightly but I didn’t turn around.

“And I uh,” I paused. I couldn’t fight it. I knew the truth and I couldn’t lie to Em. “I made huge mistake.”

Em squinted at me. “What did you do?”

“I told him to leave.”

“Ouch.” Kenny slipped out, getting a hit on the chest from Em.

Em nodded, her eyes fixed on the door. “Well you said it was a mistake, right?”

I nodded. “Yeah.”

“So do you love him too?”

I bit my lip. Kenny’s eyes were also fixed on the door. I shook them both off and tapped my foot.

“It doesn’t matter.” I said. “Even if I did, I have a boyfriend.”

“You didn’t answer the question.” Em eyed me.

I nodded. “I uh, I do.”

Suddenly I heard a cough behind me. A very, very familiar cough. I turned and was immediately met with greenish blue eyes, redish brown hair, and the sexiest lip bite I had ever seen.

My entire body froze. “G-Garrett?”

I heard Kennedy and Em shuffling nervously behind me, slowly walking away to the backroom of the shop as I turned back to Garrett. Crap. He was not supposed to hear that.

“Hey Em.” Garrett bit his lip, looking down at me. “I wanted to talk to you.”

I nodded. “Did you uh, hear any of that? That conversation just then?”

Garrett laughed a little and nodded. “Enough of it.”

“Oh.”

“Lee,” He sighed, holding my hand lightly and dangling my fingers, “I just wanted to tell you that uh, I’ll wait for you. However long it takes for you to see, I’ll be here.”

My heart pounded as his words crashed into my brain. I shook my head softly. Kenny and Em were in love, and they were engaged. Garrett and I were, essentially, in love. And I wasn’t doing anything about it.

“Kenley?” Garrett said looking down at me.

Quickly I wrapped my hands around his neck and kissed him. He wrapped his hands around my waist after a second and unlocked our lips, placing his head on my forehead.

“You shouldn’t have to wait.” I said quietly.

He nodded. “Then don’t make me.”

“It’s just hard-”

Garrett kissed me again. I couldn’t do anything with him around. I was too weak to stop him and I didn’t want him too. I sighed and rubbed his neck slowly.

“I wish we could get away.” I whispered. “Just you and me.”

Garrett’s eyes popped open and he nodded. “We can get away. Let’s go.”

“It’s not that easy-”

“You just said you wanted to.” Garrett laughed. “I’m saying we can. Just for a little while. Please.”

I nodded quickly, kissing him one last time before I let him lead me out the front door of the store and into his yellow car.

Even as he rolled out of the parking lot, he kept his hand in mine, slowly moving his fingers back and forth as he would smile and look over at me every so often.

“I love you.” I said quietly, looking up at him. “Garrett I love you.”

“I love you too, Lee.”

All of a sudden, nothing mattered. Where he was taking me, what Em thought we were doing, what Brendan was going to think.

As long as I had Garrett, everything just seemed to fade into the distance.