Ready When You Are

I walked into the shop Wednesday night and sighed at the note waiting for me on the counter.

“Be in late. I can explain! –Em.”

Laughing, I set down my bag and went over to fix up some racks of new CD’s that had been rummaged through and misplaced. I tapped my foot mindlessly to the beat of a Blink 182 song and put records back in their place. I was the only one in the store, and the air was so calm. I felt peaceful.

I heard the door jingle but pretended not to notice. It was probably just a regular customer and they wouldn’t need to pay right away. I kept on tapping my foot to “Adam’s Song” and humming the tune softly. A cough rang out behind me.

“Can I get some service?” A voice said.

A bit startled, I turned around and smiled at the boy before me, holding my heart. “You scared me, Gare. I thought you were an actual customer.”

I picked up a Dave Matthews Band record and moved it to its section, smiling back at Garrett who followed me.

“I am an actual customer!” He protested, rolling up his sleeves, “So show me some good records.”

Was he for real? I smirked at him as he nodded. I sighed and motioned for him to follow me to a rack I had specially organized with my favorite new music. In that moment, I was proud of myself. I knew it would come in handy one day.

“So,” I said, crouching down and looking up at him, “Mr…?” I realized I had no idea what his last name was.

He laughed. “Nickelsen.”

“Okay, Mr. Nickelsen. Well, here we have a classic album that I’ve been listening to recently. “Dig Out Your Soul” by Oasis. Kinda old, I know, but I’ve never gotten tired of it.”

I tossed him the CD and he looked at it for a second, nodding.

I went on, “and you can never go wrong with a little Sum 41. Teen angst makes the world go round.” Garrett picked up “Underclass Hero” as I gave him a thumbs up.

“Last, but definitely not least, “Passive Me Aggressive You” is a new album by The Naked and Famous. Feel good tracks, guaranteed.”

Now granted, I am usually an extremely tentative person. But give me something I’m interested in to talk about, and I could talk for hours. Especially when it came to music. And there was something about Garrett that made me want to say more. Like an energy that wanted me to keep him around.

Garrett held the three records in his hands and stuck out his bottom lip, nodding happily. I laughed as an idea popped into my head.

“Wanna listen to some music now?” I asked him, biting my lip and smiling.

I saw a light appear in Garrett’s eye as he ran into another section of the store, grabbing a copy of “Gold” by Ryan Adams. It was one of my favorite albums.

“So I’m savin’ these for later,” Garrett explained, “but how about some easy listening?” He held up the CD.

I laughed and nodded, grabbing the sleeve of his shirt as I led him into the backroom where the stereo was located. I popped out “Enema of State” and threw in “Gold”, pressing a few buttons until Ryan Adam’s crispy sound filled the room.

Garrett closed the door and slid onto the couch in the back and I slipped down next to him, leaning my head on the wall and closing my eyes.

Ryan Adam’s voice filled our ears.

“Dancing when the stars go blue

Dancing where the evening fills

Dancing in your wooden shoes

In a wedding gown.”

All of a sudden, Garrett got up and bowed his head, offering his hand. I could see where this was going. I giggled and took his hand.

Garrett tilted his head back and laughed as he twirled me around. I smiled breathlessly and hummed the lyrics and let Garrett sway me around, dancing softly to the music and laughing.

“I love his voice in this song.” Garrett told me, smiling only inches away from my face. “It’s so fresh. Like you can feel it.”

“Laughing with your pretty mouth

Laughing with your broken eyes

Laughing with your lover’s tongue

In a lullaby.”

I laughed softly and nodded. “It sounds pure.” I stated simply.

“Exactly,” Garrett let out an easy smile and looked at the ground slightly as we spun around. “Sara didn’t really listen to Ryan Adams.”

Just the mention of her name brought me into a fit of what happened in the shop Monday. Did he break up with her yet? I badly hoped so.

“She has not led a full life.” I looked at my hand on his shoulder, and felt my head hit it as well.

Garrett let out a breath and laughed. “Sara didn’t understand me a lot more ways than that. Maybe that’s why this is all happening.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, keeping my composure.

Garrett sighed again. “That maybe I knew we weren’t right for each other all along. I just didn’t want to see it.”

The words struck my heart in a way I didn’t expect them to. Why did they seem so relevant? Why did my brain suck them in and stick them there? Why did I have an attachment to the words?

“Did you break up with her?” I asked softly.

Garrett looked down at my shoulder. “I’m going to do it tonight. I’m going to her place.”

I bit my lip and gazed at him. His eyes went from the free, fun-loving look he had when he had first started dancing with me. Now they were swollen again, as they had looked when we first saw Sara and that guy.

We were still spinning as I rested my cheek on his shoulder again. “Come here to buy some tunes before you talked to her?” I laughed. “That always calms me down, too.”

Garrett let out a little chuckle. “Yeah, that.” He gulped. “And you calm me down. Everything just seems clearer and easy. And I’ll need those two things.” He laughed again as I nodded.

Those words hit my heart as well. But in a much different way than the first ones. In a way that made my heart skip and beat and make me want to sink into his chest even more. The kind that made me love this moment as we laughed and he spun me around.

The kind that made me want to dance with Garrett for the rest of the night and never let him go. Ryan Adams voice filled the room as I thought.

“Where do you go when you’re lonely?

Where do you go when you’re blue?

Where do you go when you’re lonely?

I’ll follow you,

When the stars go blue.”