Until The End

It was no surprise that most of my time over the next few days was taken up with thinking about Amy. Not only was she the first girl I'd ever kissed, but she was the only girl I'd ever found myself particularly attracted to. Obviously, many of the girls around my town were pretty hot, but for some reason, I'd never found myself even looking at them for longer than two seconds.

Maybe it was because I knew none of them would have given me the time of day; maybe it was the shared experience of the run-in with Brett at the dance. Maybe it was the fact that for once, the bully had backed away from me, instead of the other way around.

I had no idea, but whatever it was, I wasn't complaining.

We hadn't kissed again since the night of the dance, nor had we talked about it, but whenever I passed her at school, or saw her when I was hanging out with Matt, there was always a strange, almost secret smile on her face, like she knew something everyone else didn't. Which, I supposed, she did.

Four days after the dance, Matt reminded us of something important.

"Hey, d'you guys remember I was talking about us playing Marlins?"

"Yeah?"

My ears pricked up as Jimmy nodded, his eyes widening.

"Well, I got a call this morning, saying if we're still interested, can we do it tonight?" He grimaced slightly, adding, "I know it's kinda short notice, but..."

"Yeah! Let's do it!" Jimmy turned to me. "What d'you reckon, bro?"

"Fuck yeah." I grinned.

"Awesome. Well, they want us there at seven, so if we cut after this we've got time to practise and write up a set-list?" Matt already knew we'd agree with that; he only said it out of habit.

So, instead of going to class after lunch, the three of us, plus Val and Leana, who wanted to watch us practise, walked out of the side-gate and across the park to Matt's house.

After an hour's practice, it was clear which songs were good enough to perform, and which were not, so we focused largely on those, ending up with a set-list of nine songs, with a playing time of about forty-five minutes. Matt had said Marlin's was giving us an hour, and if they liked us, not only might we get paid, but they might ask us to play there again.

Before we knew it, it was six o'clock. I packed up my guitar and amp, carefully coiling my lead (I only had one; I couldn't afford for it to break) while Matt called the bar to ask if we needed to bring our own drums. There weren't any parents available to drive us, unfortunately, but Marlin's was within walking distance. None of us, however, wanted to have to carry a full kit down the street. A guitar was one thing; drums were a totally different matter.

"It's cool, they've got some there," Matt said finally, tossing the phone through the kitchen door where it clattered onto the counter.

"D'you guys need any help?" Val asked, from where she was sitting on Matt's spare amp. Leana nodded, sipping a can of Coke.

"I think we're good, thanks, babe." Matt walked over and kissed her forehead.

Eventually, we were ready to go. I pulled the guitar case onto my back and turned to say something to the others, but what I was going to say flew out of my head when I saw Amy standing in the doorway to the kitchen.

"Can I come watch you guys?"

Matt grimaced. "I don't know, they might not let you in..."

"You're underage too!" She pointed at him accusingly, her eyebrows pulling down in a frown.

"She can at least try?" I suggested, when the initial shock of seeing her there had worn off. "The worst they can do is say no, right?"

After a second, Matt shrugged. "Whatever. Come if you want."

"Awesome!" She disappeared, running through the kitchen, then came back with a jacket on, joining us as we walked through the yard to the front gate. The rest of us waited while Matt locked up the back of the house and jogged round to check the front door, then we started walking up the street towards the centre of town.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn't until I was actually standing there, guitar in hand, at least twenty pairs of eyes on me and the guys, that I started feeling really nervous. Twenty people doesn't sound like a lot, but considering I had only ever played my guitar in front of my mom, dad, Matt and Jimmy, it felt like a crowd.

It occurred to me, right then, that I'd never even played it for Amy to hear.

God, please don't let me fuck this up...

The owner of Marlin's introduced us, then Matt took the microphone and made a slightly nervous intro of his own. When he was done, he waved his right hand, signalling for us to start our first song, the tentatively titled 'Lips Of Deceit'.

I had to pull off several difficult techniques in this song; at the start I wasn't sure I could do it, but as it turned out, my hands knew what to do without me telling them. I knew that if I stopped to think about it, I'd make a mistake, so I didn't. I just let my hands do the work.

After what felt like five minutes, our set was over. The audience (which seemed to have grown in the twenty minutes or so) clapped and whistled appreciatively as we set down our instruments, and the owner came over to congratulate us.

"That was awesome, boys!"

"Thanks," Matt replied, running a hand through his hair, grinning.

"Tell ya what, you agree to come back next week and your drinks tonight are on the house?" the owner offered.

Matt and I shared a look, then nodded in unison.

"Sounds good to me!" Jimmy called from where he was disentangling himself from the kit.

Matt obviously hadn't told them how old we were, but nobody seemed to mind. It wasn't like we'd be getting hammered anyway; a couple of drinks wouldn't hurt. Val, Leana and Amy headed home almost straight after we finished playing, pleading tiredness (and, in the case of Amy, looming homework deadlines).

An hour or so later, we decided to call it a night and packed up the gear. It seemed a shame to be leaving, but we'd be going back same time next week, so I had that to look forward to.

We got back to Matt's house and, finding a few unopened cans of beer in his garage, set upon finishing them off while chatting about the night's activities.

"What was that twiddly thing you did in the last song, Zack?" Matt asked, when we'd been back about half an hour.

"Eh?" I tried to recall what I'd played. "Oh, that. I showed you that last week."

"Did you?" He frowned. "It sounded different."

"Oh. Was it okay?" Now I was frowning.

"No, it sounded great, don't get me wrong. I just didn't think I'd heard you play it before. Didn't take you for the improv type."

We all laughed, passing around more drinks as the evening wore on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I'll see you at school then!" I called, raising a hand in farewell as Matt's front door swung closed behind me. Turning, I started to walk back towards the park, but before I'd walked twenty yards, there was a shout from behind me.

"Zacky, wait!"

I turned just as Amy caught me up, her trainers smacking against the tarmac. She tossed her hair back over her shoulders and asked, panting slightly, "Can we talk?"

"Uh, sure." I nodded for her to lead the way; my heartbeat picked up as we walked quickly into the trees by the side of the lake.

Suddenly, I realized we were inadvertently heading in the direction of the 'spot'; not a good idea, just in case Matt and Jimmy decided to go there for a few drinks later. If they were seen…

"Let's go this way," I suggested, nudging her arm and motioning in the opposite direction, towards the water's edge.

"Oh, good thought." She nodded and followed me until we reached the side of the lake, separated from the rest of the park by a thick screen of leaves.

It occurred to me later: the sheer fact that she trusted me enough to go with me, alone, into such a secluded area, should have told me what was going to happen.

Amy sat down on the grass, cross-legged, and patted the ground next to her. After a second of hesitation, I sat down beside her, my legs stretched out in front of me and my weight supported on my elbows.

"You're really good at guitar," she said, grinning at my embarrassment.

"Thanks," I mumbled; I hadn't had much experience in being complimented, so it was a strange experience. "You wanted to talk about that?"

"No, I…" She trailed off, looking down as if she was trying to figure out how best to word what she was about to say.

"Look, if this is about, you know…" I started, already feeling my face beginning to redden. "I don't, like, expect anything, or whatever."

She looked like she wanted to laugh at my awkwardness, but to her credit, she just nodded, leaning forwards slightly. Her hair fell forwards into her eyes and she brushed it back impatiently, saying, "But something did happen. No point pretending it was nothing."

I was already starting to see where she was heading, but (for clarification, if nothing else) I still felt the need to ask, "So… What are you saying, exactly?"

She paused, then said abruptly, "Look. I like you. You like me, right?"

"Right." I still wasn't one-hundred percent sure of where she was going, so I waited for her to say something more; after a few seconds, she did.

"Why don't you just cut to the chase and ask me out?"

Well. Was not expecting that.

"Uh…" I said eloquently, before my brain finally kicked in. "Will you…go out with me?"

"Sure." She smiled.

That's it? I wanted to say. You practically force me to ask you, and all you can say is 'sure'?

Out- loud, to break the silence, I said, "Great."

"So…where are we going?" she asked, still smiling. "Nowhere too fancy, I hope."

I laughed out loud at that. As if I have the money to take her somewhere fancy…

"What's funny?" she asked, but she was giggling too.

"Oh, nothing…"