You're The Only Hope For Me

I stripped of to all but my boxer shorts and my tshirt . I would have taken my tshirt off, but the cold nights in New Jersey were the worst in the world.

I crawled into Gee's bed, and let sleep close my eyes.

"Can I ask you a question, Fi?" Gerard asked.

We were layed back to back, me on the left side of the bed, him on the right.

"Course" I answered sleepily.

"How did you...how did you figure out you were gay?"

I turned around to face him, at the same time he had gone to do the same to me.
"Um, I don't really know. I just...honestly, i'm not really sure if I am. But I know i'm not attracted to any girls, but I haven't really been attracted to any guys. Not really"

I was lying.

I was attratced to Gerard, and my feelings were getting stronger.

I had only realized it today, when I was getting Gee the album. I looked at it and saw how happy Gee would be, and I suddenly knew I wanted to make him that way all the time, because thats how he made me. When he came down the stairs from the store, I looked at him and saw the person I had watched for over ten years, in a whole new way. He was the person I wanted to be with, the only person I could ever even consider being with.

"Thats kinda what I'm thinking" Gee whispered back. "Frank, I- I just want you to know that-that I really admire you for coming out to me" He was so close to me now, whispering right into my face.

"Thanks. That means alot. I-I admire you, too. I always have done" I said back. It was the least I could say. I wanted to say everything to him I needed to say, but I held myself back.

"Thanks, man. Best buds forever, right?" He joked, but I knew the first part was him being deadly serious.

"For sure" I said, half serious, half joking.

"Night, Fi. Love ya" I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Love you too"

My eyes closed, and all I could feel was Gerard's warm body close to mine.