Let The Walls Break Down

Well today was my last day in Arizona and I was moving to Wisconsin. I really wanted to see John and Ross before I left and give them a hug or something. We went to my aunt’s house and my cousin Patrick was there with his friends Garrett and Kennedy. Jared, Ross, John and this guy Eric were out in the street playing basketball. John had a backwards baseball hat on and a baggy t-shirt and athletic shorts. He was so cute. He was dribbling the ball, keeping it from Kennedy, when he looked up at me then Jared tackled him and he fell over. I was just watching them play when John got back up and threw the ball at me aggressively and walked away. Ross and Jared looked at each other and followed after him. I felt extremely hurt. Not because someone threw a ball at me angrily; John threw it. I was so sure we were going to be together forever but now I was second guessing myself.

I saw him later on that day and he looked at me with resentment then he walked away and that was the last time I was going to see him. I didn’t get a hug, I didn’t get a ‘bye’…I didn’t get anything.

I woke up sweating and Maria was coming in my room with a bagel. “What the fuck is this?”

“It’s bridal food.”

“This is bullshit, that’s what this is.”

“I’m not going to make you greasy sausage the morning of your wedding.”

“Well then get me a toaster strudel!”

“Talk about bridezilla…” She said as she walked out of the room. My mom came after breakfast with my dress and she did my make up as Maria did my hair. “John won’t want to take his eyes off of you when we’re done with you.”

“Or his hands,” my mom said.

“Mom!”

“What?! We all know you’re not a virgin.”

I smiled and let them get to work on me. At around noon, my dad came by to pick us up and he was already in his tux. When he saw me, he wasn’t the angry guy I always saw. He actually looked happy. “Are you scared, Hun?” he asked me and I shook my head.

“I couldn’t be more ready.” He gave me a hug and we all piled into my dad’s SUV. Once at the theater, we went into one of the backstage lounges and started getting ready. When I got in my dress, my mom actually started crying and Maria came out in her purple bridesmaid dress and got a tissue out for her.

“I just can’t believe how beautiful you look.” Thanks, Mom. Soon enough it was three o’clock and an orchestral version of I Must Be Dreaming started playing. My mom left then and took her seat, then Maria walked out and met Eric and locked arms with him without protest and they walked down the aisle. Austin was carrying Jenna down the aisle as the flower girl and spreading pedals everywhere. It was a sight. Next was Zack carrying Holden with the rings and handed them to the preacher.

Then my dad led me out. “It’s time, Holly.” We walked around the place and by the time the song was over, the bridal march started and everyone was looking at me. It didn’t feel like I could walk but somehow I was moving down the aisle…almost gravitating towards John. When I looked at him and made eye contact, past memories came rushing in. I saw him when he was playing basketball in the street, I saw him the first time I walked in Lisa’s house, I saw him as he proposed, I saw him as Jenna was born…and I saw him now. I reached him and my dad moved my veil from in front of my face and kissed my cheek and sat down. I took John’s hand then. I didn’t think I would be so moved by getting married because we’ve been together for a long time, but I was. I wasn’t scared, I was just anxious to start my life with him.

We said our vows and repeated and promised what the preacher said and that was it. He handed us the rings and I put his on him first, then he showed me the beautiful ring he had gotten me. “This is what I told Holden to keep a secret.”

“It’s beautiful, John.” I stroked his face once he placed it on my finger.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.” It didn’t feel like this was what I’d been waiting five years for. It was so easy. John looked at me and smiled, wrapped his arms around my waist, and kissed me.

“I love you,” I whispered and rested my head on his chest.

He hugged me. “I love you, too.”

He grabbed my hand and led me down the aisle as everyone clapped and we went to go get ready for the reception. It was already going on by the time we arrived and John’s arm was around me as we entered the room. Everyone that was there, don’t get me wrong I love them to death, just didn’t matter right now. I just wanted my time with John. The party music quieted down and While Listening to Rock and Roll started to play and John and I made our way to the middle of the floor and began our first dance as a married couple and pictures started snapping. Soon others started dancing (my mom and dad first, followed by John’s parents, then Austin and Maria and Kara and Rian) and Holden was twirling around on the dance floor as Zack picked Jenna up and danced with her. After that, other songs came on and then it was time to cut the cake.

After everyone got a piece of cake, it was time for the toasts. “John…although I might not have showed it…I really have liked you and I wouldn’t pick another man for my little girl to marry. I wish both of you the best,” my dad said and raised his glass of champagne.

“Holly you are truly a blessing to John and you two are obviously made for each other. I know parents always say that they’ve gained a daughter, but that’s not true. I’ve felt like she’s been mine years before today. I love you both,” Jen said and John kissed my cheek. Other people went up to speak and then everyone started dancing again. Rian found me in the crowd of people and John let me go talk to him.

“Congratulations,” he said and put his hands in his pockets. He had a smile on his face that reminded me of when I first met him.

“Thank you.”

“I wanted to thank you for inviting me to your wedding.”

“Well, you’re welcome. It wouldn’t be right if you weren’t here.”

He stuck out his hand for me to shake. “Friends?”

I shook his hand and smiled. “Friends.” I pulled him into a hug. “So how about you and Kara, huh? How’d that happen?”

He instantly brightened up. “I don’t know how it happened, but I’m so glad it did. I’m going to propose. She’s pregnant, did she tell you?”

“Yeah, she did. I’m really happy for you guys.”

“I’m happy that you and I found someone that makes us happy.” I didn’t say anything, just smiled as he walked away and Zack found me then.

“So, Holly…”

“So, Zack…”

“Alex told me something the other day.”

“And what was that?”

He started smiling. He looked pretty damn cute. “He told me that you wanted me in the beginning.”

“Just because you were shirtless. I mean, your abs were pretty beautiful.”

He ran his hand down his stomach. “Oh, these old things?”

I laughed at him. “Get out of here, you pedophile.” He smiled and gave me a hug and as he walked away from me, John found me.

“What was that about?”

“Well wishes.” We were out in the front of the theater away from everyone else and he suddenly grabbed my hand and put his other arm around me and started slow dancing.

When all was said and done and everyone signed our wedding book (we called it the Book of Me and You because we’re sentimental like that), we changed into different clothes and left, leaving Holden and Jenna with my parents.

We were in the car driving towards the airport when John looked over at me. “It’s so weird that you’re my wife now.”

“It’s so weird I actually married you.”

“I know, why did you do that?”

“I felt sorry for you.”

He grabbed my hand and intertwined his fingers with mine as he drove. “I love you.”

I played with his hand. “You’re cute.”

“You don’t love me?”

“Of course not.”

“Oh, okay.”

“John?”

“Yes, Mrs. O’Callaghan?”

I smiled. “I love you.”

****

Even though it was December 26, John and I were laying on a beach in the Bahamas in a comfortable 80 degrees. We didn’t need much of a honeymoon, just time away from the kids. And it was nice. It was nice to lay with John without being interrupted by a screaming child or by Holden barging in the room during Mommy and Daddy Private Time. All we needed was a week alone.

I found myself looking at my sparkly wedding ring when we were lying in bed together. “You like what you see?”

“Yes I do. You know me so well.”

“Every other ring was just a ring. But when I saw that one I saw you.”

I rolled over on top of him and held his face in my hands. “You’re so cute. But you’re so cheesy.”

“You tell me that a lot.”

“Because it’s true!”

I just looked up at him quietly. “You’re beautiful,” he said and kissed me.

Before we knew it, our week was over and we were on a plane back to Arizona. “I wish I knew you in high school,” I said as we sat on our bed once we got back home.

“You did.” He smiled and continued when he saw that I didn’t mean that. “Why do you wish you knew me in high school?”

“So we could have gone to prom together. You would have looked so adorable with your long hair and a tux.”

He looked at me weird but smiled. “Adorable? Is that all I am to you?”

“No, but it’s what you are half the time. The other half you’re just ugly.”

“We can’t all be beautiful 24/7 like you…”

“Don’t bullshit me.” I smiled and he kissed me quickly. “I miss the kids.”

“They should be here any minute,” he said and looked at his phone. “I bet they missed us too.” He laid back on the bed and put his arms behind his head. “I wish I had taken you to prom.”

“Why’s that?”

“You would have looked gorgeous in a green dress.”

“How did you know I wore green to prom?”

“I’m psychic.” He paused. “I saw a picture on your parents’ mantle before they moved. By the way, the guy, total douche.”

“What makes you say that?”

“He’s not me.” I lied next to him and he put his arm around me.

I snuggled my head into his chest. “Yeah he was pretty douchey. Left me on the side of the road because I didn’t want to go to a hotel with him afterwards.”

“Same thing kinda happened to me, but I wasn’t left on the side of the road.”

I laughed. “Then it’s not the same thing.” He played with my hair. “So she wanted to sleep with you but you didn’t?” He nodded. “Wow, usually it’s the other way around.”

“Yeah, well…I didn’t want her like that. Even though she had been my girlfriend for a while. Who did you take?”

“This guy Maria set me up with. I think she was her cousin or her brother’s friend or something. It didn’t really matter.”

“Let’s go to prom together.”

“What, like crash a prom?”

“No, just get all dressed up and dance and the whole nine yards. Limo, dinner, corsage…everything. Since we didn’t have great times at our own, we should have one together.”

I was quiet for a while as he was stroking my arm. “What if I had never moved? Would you ever have asked me out?”

“Well, eventually. I wasn’t going to ask an 11 year old to be my girlfriend. That’s kind of odd.”

“Would you have asked me to prom?”

He was quiet. “I believe so. I was going to say no because I was dating Megan at the time, but if you had never left you would have been in her place. And no doubt I would have let you take me to a hotel.”

I laughed. “I don’t think I would have gone with you to that hotel, though. I was like…15, maybe 16. I really wasn’t ready. I wasn’t even thinking about sex then… Did you ever think about me after I left?”

“Once in a blue moon. I would think of that girl with the braces and flat chest who would stare at me constantly.”

“Why did you throw that ball at me?”

He knew exactly what I was talking about. “You distracted me and Jared pummeled me and I was embarrassed to be seen like that in front of you.”

“So instinctively you threw a ball at me.”

He smiled and laughed adorably. “It made sense at the time. I didn’t know that was the actual day you were leaving until you were already gone. Otherwise I would have handled it a little differently… Did you ever think about me after you left?”

“Ceaselessly. At least for a month or two.” He was looking at me like I was crazy. “You broke my heart and hurt my feelings. I couldn’t get over you just yet.”

It was silent for a minute as he kissed the top of my head. “I don’t think things would have worked out the same if you hadn’t moved. I think everything that happened happened for a reason and something different would have led you elsewhere.”

“I think we need to buy Pat a car or something,” I said and he laughed again.

“Why’s that?”

“He’s the one that called me and brought us back together.”

“It was my suggestion.”

I looked at him intently as the front door opened and shut. “MOMMY! DADDY!” We heard downstairs then footsteps up the stairs. Soon enough, Holden ran into the room and jumped on top of us and hugged us.

“Missed you, kid!” I said and hugged back. John’s dad walked in the door with Jenna hung around his neck.

“Hey guys, did you have fun?”

“Sure did, Dad,” I said and took Jenna from him. It was kinda scary how much John looked like his dad. He gave me a hug and kissed my head as John got up with Holden and walked over to us and hugged him.

“Glad to be back with the kids though.” He smiled and put his arm around me. “You staying for dinner, Dad? I’m making fried chicken.”

“Oh, that sounds tempting but I better get back to your mother. She’s cooking enchiladas and you know how she is when no one is there to eat her cooking.”

“Shane…Ross…”

“Ross doesn’t live with us anymore…Where have you been?”

“Here.”

His dad nodded. “Well, Shane’s there… If she hasn’t started cooking yet, we’ll come on by.” He started to leave. “See you guys later.”

I handed Jenna to John and he had a kid on each arm as he looked at me like what do to. “I’m going to go check the mail. Be right back.” I kissed his lips quickly as he started walking to Holden’s room. When I got to the mailbox only a few things were in there, which was odd because we’d been gone for a week, and one item in there was beautifully wrapped as I saw it was a save the date wedding invitation for Maria and Austin.