Bringing the Devil Out of Me

I sat on Marc's couch, flipping through channels but not really paying attention to what was on the TV. Marc and I had returned to his apartment to find it empty. Alice hadn't had a scheduled interview, and she hadn't left a note or text message telling where she was going. Her phone remained unanswered, and I was worried. The last time she did this was when she couldn't handle something stressful. Since nothing had happened between us that I knew of, all I could do was wonder. By the time she came through the door it was already 7:30.

"Sidney...what are you doing here?" she asked as she walked in and turned to find me sitting on the couch. I stood up and stretched.

"Waiting for you to get home. You didn't answer your phone..." I said. Her face was rather distracted, but she pulled out her phone and nodded.

"Oh...I didn't realize that you called me..." she muttered before walking into her bedroom. I followed her, and my concern grew as she sat on the edge of her bed, absently staring at the wall.

"Alice...what happened?" I asked her. She continued to stare at the wall until I placed a hand on her shoulder and she jumped a kilometer high.

"I...I had a run in with an...old friend," she said slowly, twisting the bracelet I had given her the month before around her wrist.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked, sitting down next to her. She shook her head, and then nodded, and then shook her head again.

"I don't know," she finally said.
"Meaning you don't know if you want to talk to me about it...right?" I sighed. Does she not trust me?

"I...he...it's a long story," she said, fumbling for words. Her eyes reflected confusion and hurt. I placed a hand on hers.

"I've got time," I said softly.

"Fine...but only on one condition," she said.

"What?" I asked.

"You tell me what you wouldn't tell me the day we started dating," she said firmly. The life had suddenly returned to her eyes. I swallowed roughly and sighed before nodding in agreement.

"Alright..." I muttered, bracing myself for the long story of my own that I was going to have to tell.

"So...when I was in high school there was a guy...Ryan. We were best friends...inseparable. He played hockey, I wrote hockey. He was bad at English and good at math...I was bad at math and good at English. We were both in the band. He played trumpet, I played flute. You can see where this is going," she said. I nodded.

"Well, our senior year we agreed that we wouldn't tell each other where we were going to college until the day after graduation. That day we found out we had chosen the same school. That was also the day he told me he loved me. I was...I was in love too, and it was as simple as that. We dated up until our senior year of college. For a while things were great, but towards the end he changed. He stopped being the fun loving, sweet guy I had fallen for, and turned into a dark, depressing monster. One day I showed up at his apartment, he told me to come in, and then he dumped me right then and there...but that wasn't the worst part. Another girl walked out of his bedroom...and he just shrugged it off. He disappeared without another word after that day. We both graduated, but until today I hadn't seen him," she explained. Her voice cracked slightly, and tears rolled from her eyes. I sighed and squeezed her hand tightly.

"You really loved him?" I asked, although I was afraid to.

"Yes," she muttered.

"Do you still love him?" I croaked.

"No. No, he hurt me too much for me to love him still. Its just the pain of having your heart broken...you never really forget it," she mumbled, shaking. I swallowed hard and pulled her to my chest.

"I know," I admitted quietly.

"What?" she asked.

"I...I've had my heart broken too. Her name was Rebecca. We met while I was still in high school. She didn't pay me half a mind when I was in school, but once I got drafted and started making a name for myself...well she played on all of those old crushes I had on her just right. I didn't even know what she was doing until I overheard her on the phone one night...I was going to tell her that I was in love with her that night. Instead, I moved out. My second girlfriend wasn't much better, although I didn't fall as hard because I was so defensive. Still hurt like hell though...that's why I haven't said 'I love you' yet, just in case you were wondering. Marc said it was weird that I haven't said it yet," I gushed, not pausing long enough for her to say something. It felt like something dark and heavy had been lifted from my chest, and for the first time in ages I was able to tell someone the truth about what had happened with Rebecca. Alice just stared at me for a little while, her big green eyes examining me carefully.

"He kissed me," she said. I felt my hands ball into fists.

"Oh yeah?" I growled.

"I punched him in the face and threw my coffee on him," she smiled. I let out a laugh. She's so perfect...she's got so much fight in her.

"I love you," I said, no longer afraid. She blushed.

"I love you too," she said before kissing me. It was like my first kiss all over again...it was shy and sweet and completely loving. I'm safe...