You Were Always Born a Crime...

It wasn't until later that night, maybe around ten o' clock or so, that I and the Way brothers set off on our way to Frank's house for the party.

Really, living with my mom my whole life, the party wan't anything that I hadn't seen before. Drinking, drugs, sex. Oh yeah. All that jazz.

All out, I wanted to party. Just purely to forget all the things that came flooding back to me earlier. Just to drown it out for a while...

Once Mikey, Gerard and I started drinking, I started feeling down. I mean, really down. Like... super depressive...

I told Mikey I was going to the bathroom for a minute. There, I lifted up my sleeve to check on how my arm looked. Really, it wasn't really healthy. I just hope none of them are infected. The last thing I never is Mikey or anyone finding out about this.

I pulled my sleeve back down and started back to the living room where Mikey was.

"Hey," said someone that I wasn't familar with at all.

I looked at them, being as rude as I usually am and not saying a greeting or anything back.

"Do you wanna try some coke?"

I blinked. Me? Cocaine? I thought for a couple of seconds.

Really... what harm could it do?

***********************************

I stumbled out of the bedroom that I followed the stranger into. My head was racing. Of course, with me, I don't realize it's a bad idea until I've done it.

Oh my friend Regret...

And that cocaine I just did... It really didn't help all the things that I was feeling. That rotting feeling in my stomach was back, and I didn't think I was going to leave soon... All the things I was thinking about earlier in the theater were back, if not stronger than ever. No wait. Scratch that. They were stronger than ever. So bad to were I felt like bursting into tears. Strangely enough, at the same time I wanted to smile.

See kids? This is why drugs are bad...

I tried my best to walk down the hall to the living room, crashing into the walls a few times.

"Ryli?" Mikey's voice surprised me. "Are you okay?"

I spun around to meet with that face I had been falling for. Those beautiful eyes that made me get lost practically everytime I looked into them.

I opened my mouth to respond, but it felt like all my words were caught in my throat. I felt like I was only able to stare at him, leaving him to give me an extremely worried look.

"Ryli? Honey, are you okay?"

My mouth was hanging open, almost like I was waiting for words to flood out when I was lost in all my thoughts. My urges to burst out in tears seemed to be over powering my mixed happy feelings by far right now. My past. My horrible previous relationship. How was I supposed to tell him something like that?

A few tears fell from my eyes, leading Mikey to grow even more concerned.

"Ryli? Ryli, please, what's wrong?"

Since my words were obviously lacking, I sought it fit to walk. I walked past Mikey and out the front door, more and more of my tears flowing from my eyes by now.

Mikey called after me. I only quickened my pace of walking.

Mikey grabbed one of my shoulders and spun me around. "Ryli, what the hell is going on?"

I wanted to tell him everything. Just... spill my guts... But I didn't... I couldn't...

I wrapped my arms around him quickly and started silently sobbing for God knows how long.

"Ryli... Honey... Do you want to go home?"

I nodded quickly. Maybe just to be alone would help. I highly doubted it, but it was worth a try...