Status: On hold
Twisted
pencilled secrets
That night, I dreamt. The dream was covered with darkness, as if I were blind; I didn’t even know if I had eyes to open. My entire being – for I didn’t know if I had a body or simply a spirit – was in a dull agony. There was a fire under my skin, if it were skin, that was burning and burning, searing at points but sometimes just like sunburn.
I could hear someone crying and, once, a scream broke through our darkness. It was like being in a state where nothing mattered but what you heard and what you felt.
And when I heard someone whispering, “Please, please stop,” in a voice that I thought sounded familiar, I started to scream, just to hear my own voice. I could feel all of their despair, though I didn’t know how many people were there, and it hurt me as if it were my own despair. We were connected, thoughts on thoughts, voices on voices – and together, we were all in pain.
When I woke up, my mouth was open and dry, and an ugly odour came from my skin.
After a steaming hot shower, I went to school, acting as though everything was normal, as though the people who passed me on the street were human and not some mythical creature. But when I arrived at my first class, the teacher took me aside. “Listen,” he told me in a low voice as the students stared at me. I guessed it wasn’t a secret now that my daughter was going to be everyone’s saviour or something.
“You probably shouldn’t come to school anymore,” he explained. “Drop out. You can get a job in this town; hell, people would probably pay to see your future daughter’s face.” I briefly thought about how fast news travels. It was like ever since my birthday, everyone knew who I was. “I just…” The teacher shook his head. “It’s not really a good idea to continue attending school. Now that people know about you…It’d make it difficult. And there are other things that you could be doing instead.” His gaze was meaningful and I knew exactly what he meant I should be doing – getting pregnant.
Leaning forward, he whispered. “You should talk to my son. He’s part faery, part werewolf. He’s quite…temperamental but he’s still a good guy. I think you’d like him. His name is Rogne Martin.” I almost rolled my eyes at him. How many people were now going to approach me to make sure I go for their son or brother or friend?
But instead of snapping at him to mind his own business – because technically, it was their business – I took his advice and simply dropped out of school. The principal agreed with my teacher, though he did suggest taking up babysitting for “practice.”
If it weren’t a good suggestion, I’d have been tempted to snap at him as well.
I arrived home within ten minutes and found an envelope on our doorstep. It was marked with my name, in the same handwriting as the birthday envelope I’d received. My breathing froze, as did my steps, and half of me didn’t even want to open it. Of course I did, though; my curiosity won over my anxiety.
Rayna,
cccccHe lies. Most don’t know but the Blood-Takers do, and he is one of them, though he tries hard to forget his humanity. We never forget our other sides; like we are made of two people, melted together to become just one.
cccccLet me tell you another story.
cccccOnce, there was a man with the brightest of minds, the warmest of hearts, but as with all, he was forever defeated by his own emotions. He was born of most powerful Breeds (or Bloods as you prefer to call them): Spirit and the rare blood of an Unknown. This made him strong in many ways.
cccccHe grew into a well-known, popular young man, who then fell in love with a woman forbidden from his grasp. She was beautiful: With unnatural eyes and hair of the sunrise, she bore the mark of being mistaken. They said all she was but a strong child of the Mixed but they were so wrong. No, she was more powerful than all they could imagine, because it was against laws for a strong Mixed to have a child with another strong Mixed. For your information, a strong Mixed (one who accepts both sides of his soul) is called a Matched, because the two sides match in equal power. Mixed Bloods are usually imbalanced in power because they choose to ignore their other side; but the Matched embrace both. I’m still finding information about why people think you have to have red hair or yellow eyes to be a Matched.
cccccAnyway, she too fell in love with the man but she wilted under the knowledge that to be with him would risk having a child, and her blood was too diverse to have a child. So, she denied him again and again and instead turned to the Humans to search for someone who could not have a child with her. She yearned for a husband; for someone to be with her in the mornings and in the evenings when she grew lonely.
cccccAnd one day, she found him: A Human man who was exactly what she wanted. Slowly, they fell in love and she forgot the Mixed man who’d stolen her heart many years before. They married and they whispered of growing old together, with wrinkled hands that still held each other.
cccccAfter only five years of bliss with this Human, the Mixed man turned up, after searching for the woman he loved so much. He saw the couple on the street one day, leaning together and smiling into each other’s eyes, and he fled in despair. Driven mad with longing, he cried her name in his sleep until he could not stand being alone any longer. And there was only one person he wanted to be with.
cccccSo, he returned to the woman and took her from her husband. It was true that she’d promised him that they’d be together one day, but it was an empty promise: She did not believe it. She had moved on but he did not, his love kept alive by her foolish promise.
cccccHe took her away, far away into a tree-strewn land where no one came. He let her live in a luxury room, full of everything she could possibly want – but the windows’ glass was too thick to break, the door locked with a code; there was simply no way to escape. Every day, he came to her room and took what he wanted, no matter how hard she cried or screamed or begged.
cccccShe grew to hate the man. And although he hurt her in every way possible, he still loved her. It was a love born of the darkness he’d found in loneliness and depression and longing.
cccccEvery night, alone in her bed, she sobbed for the Human man she loved. She knew it wouldn’t be long before the Mixed man who’d stolen her hunted him down and took his soul for keeping. It was a skill known only to the Unknowns, and he had blood enough in him to have gained that skill. She despaired.
cccccOne early morning, she grew sick. Her stomach rolled and the bile rose in her throat, for she hadn’t eaten enough yet for proper vomit. And when she glanced in the mirror, shock stilled in her veins: Her stomach had a small bulge, one that might not be noticeable if she were wearing a baggy shirt.
cccccAnd that was when she knew something unthinkable was inside her: A baby. It was unlikely to be her Human’s baby, for her Human was infertile and it was the Mixed man who sometimes forgot protection in the moments he – she shuddered at this thought – raped her. But she felt no disgust or hate towards the baby; instead, she wanted to protect it, even though she knew it would be destroyed soon after it was born.
cccccThe next time he showed in her room, she was waiting. She knocked him over the head, surprising him, with a leg from a table she’d broken. He stumbled and fell, and she ran while the door was still open. They were so alone; it was only them in that big lonely house.
cccccSo, she ran and ran and ran, into the night, into the trees, into Nowhere. She disappeared from everyone, including her Human, who she’d lost all hope for, and the Mixed man who’d killed her soul.
cccccAnd alone again, the Mixed man gave into the darkness in his soul. He brought his Unknown father to death, something almost unheard of, and stole a girl from each Breed to sacrifice them in order to perform an ancient spell that would turn him into a monster everyone fears. He turned into a person made of Darkness, someone who bred children to do his bidding, one who kept the souls he was fond of in cages. He set out to find the girl who ran and to do this, he tortured and raped and killed many people.
cccccThey won’t tell you the worst he’s done, because they don’t want you to get scared and run.
cccccAll of the Breeds fear the Darkness. Now, you know his weakness, one that many people do not know. You’ll need to know it. Even the Breeds against your family are terrified of this enemy. Everyone who goes to see the Darkness never come back, not alive. Only one person has, and that person did not get out unharmed.
cccccRight now, I have one piece of advice for you: Don’t have a daughter. One day, I will come and help train you, but until then you must find someone who is trustworthy and willing to train you. And that someone – or more than one person – has to be of your Breed, someone for each Breed in you. Or Blood, I suppose you call it.
ccccccccccccccccccccccccc- The Shadower
I could hear someone crying and, once, a scream broke through our darkness. It was like being in a state where nothing mattered but what you heard and what you felt.
And when I heard someone whispering, “Please, please stop,” in a voice that I thought sounded familiar, I started to scream, just to hear my own voice. I could feel all of their despair, though I didn’t know how many people were there, and it hurt me as if it were my own despair. We were connected, thoughts on thoughts, voices on voices – and together, we were all in pain.
When I woke up, my mouth was open and dry, and an ugly odour came from my skin.
---
After a steaming hot shower, I went to school, acting as though everything was normal, as though the people who passed me on the street were human and not some mythical creature. But when I arrived at my first class, the teacher took me aside. “Listen,” he told me in a low voice as the students stared at me. I guessed it wasn’t a secret now that my daughter was going to be everyone’s saviour or something.
“You probably shouldn’t come to school anymore,” he explained. “Drop out. You can get a job in this town; hell, people would probably pay to see your future daughter’s face.” I briefly thought about how fast news travels. It was like ever since my birthday, everyone knew who I was. “I just…” The teacher shook his head. “It’s not really a good idea to continue attending school. Now that people know about you…It’d make it difficult. And there are other things that you could be doing instead.” His gaze was meaningful and I knew exactly what he meant I should be doing – getting pregnant.
Leaning forward, he whispered. “You should talk to my son. He’s part faery, part werewolf. He’s quite…temperamental but he’s still a good guy. I think you’d like him. His name is Rogne Martin.” I almost rolled my eyes at him. How many people were now going to approach me to make sure I go for their son or brother or friend?
But instead of snapping at him to mind his own business – because technically, it was their business – I took his advice and simply dropped out of school. The principal agreed with my teacher, though he did suggest taking up babysitting for “practice.”
If it weren’t a good suggestion, I’d have been tempted to snap at him as well.
I arrived home within ten minutes and found an envelope on our doorstep. It was marked with my name, in the same handwriting as the birthday envelope I’d received. My breathing froze, as did my steps, and half of me didn’t even want to open it. Of course I did, though; my curiosity won over my anxiety.
Rayna,
cccccHe lies. Most don’t know but the Blood-Takers do, and he is one of them, though he tries hard to forget his humanity. We never forget our other sides; like we are made of two people, melted together to become just one.
cccccLet me tell you another story.
cccccOnce, there was a man with the brightest of minds, the warmest of hearts, but as with all, he was forever defeated by his own emotions. He was born of most powerful Breeds (or Bloods as you prefer to call them): Spirit and the rare blood of an Unknown. This made him strong in many ways.
cccccHe grew into a well-known, popular young man, who then fell in love with a woman forbidden from his grasp. She was beautiful: With unnatural eyes and hair of the sunrise, she bore the mark of being mistaken. They said all she was but a strong child of the Mixed but they were so wrong. No, she was more powerful than all they could imagine, because it was against laws for a strong Mixed to have a child with another strong Mixed. For your information, a strong Mixed (one who accepts both sides of his soul) is called a Matched, because the two sides match in equal power. Mixed Bloods are usually imbalanced in power because they choose to ignore their other side; but the Matched embrace both. I’m still finding information about why people think you have to have red hair or yellow eyes to be a Matched.
cccccAnyway, she too fell in love with the man but she wilted under the knowledge that to be with him would risk having a child, and her blood was too diverse to have a child. So, she denied him again and again and instead turned to the Humans to search for someone who could not have a child with her. She yearned for a husband; for someone to be with her in the mornings and in the evenings when she grew lonely.
cccccAnd one day, she found him: A Human man who was exactly what she wanted. Slowly, they fell in love and she forgot the Mixed man who’d stolen her heart many years before. They married and they whispered of growing old together, with wrinkled hands that still held each other.
cccccAfter only five years of bliss with this Human, the Mixed man turned up, after searching for the woman he loved so much. He saw the couple on the street one day, leaning together and smiling into each other’s eyes, and he fled in despair. Driven mad with longing, he cried her name in his sleep until he could not stand being alone any longer. And there was only one person he wanted to be with.
cccccSo, he returned to the woman and took her from her husband. It was true that she’d promised him that they’d be together one day, but it was an empty promise: She did not believe it. She had moved on but he did not, his love kept alive by her foolish promise.
cccccHe took her away, far away into a tree-strewn land where no one came. He let her live in a luxury room, full of everything she could possibly want – but the windows’ glass was too thick to break, the door locked with a code; there was simply no way to escape. Every day, he came to her room and took what he wanted, no matter how hard she cried or screamed or begged.
cccccShe grew to hate the man. And although he hurt her in every way possible, he still loved her. It was a love born of the darkness he’d found in loneliness and depression and longing.
cccccEvery night, alone in her bed, she sobbed for the Human man she loved. She knew it wouldn’t be long before the Mixed man who’d stolen her hunted him down and took his soul for keeping. It was a skill known only to the Unknowns, and he had blood enough in him to have gained that skill. She despaired.
cccccOne early morning, she grew sick. Her stomach rolled and the bile rose in her throat, for she hadn’t eaten enough yet for proper vomit. And when she glanced in the mirror, shock stilled in her veins: Her stomach had a small bulge, one that might not be noticeable if she were wearing a baggy shirt.
cccccAnd that was when she knew something unthinkable was inside her: A baby. It was unlikely to be her Human’s baby, for her Human was infertile and it was the Mixed man who sometimes forgot protection in the moments he – she shuddered at this thought – raped her. But she felt no disgust or hate towards the baby; instead, she wanted to protect it, even though she knew it would be destroyed soon after it was born.
cccccThe next time he showed in her room, she was waiting. She knocked him over the head, surprising him, with a leg from a table she’d broken. He stumbled and fell, and she ran while the door was still open. They were so alone; it was only them in that big lonely house.
cccccSo, she ran and ran and ran, into the night, into the trees, into Nowhere. She disappeared from everyone, including her Human, who she’d lost all hope for, and the Mixed man who’d killed her soul.
cccccAnd alone again, the Mixed man gave into the darkness in his soul. He brought his Unknown father to death, something almost unheard of, and stole a girl from each Breed to sacrifice them in order to perform an ancient spell that would turn him into a monster everyone fears. He turned into a person made of Darkness, someone who bred children to do his bidding, one who kept the souls he was fond of in cages. He set out to find the girl who ran and to do this, he tortured and raped and killed many people.
cccccThey won’t tell you the worst he’s done, because they don’t want you to get scared and run.
cccccAll of the Breeds fear the Darkness. Now, you know his weakness, one that many people do not know. You’ll need to know it. Even the Breeds against your family are terrified of this enemy. Everyone who goes to see the Darkness never come back, not alive. Only one person has, and that person did not get out unharmed.
cccccRight now, I have one piece of advice for you: Don’t have a daughter. One day, I will come and help train you, but until then you must find someone who is trustworthy and willing to train you. And that someone – or more than one person – has to be of your Breed, someone for each Breed in you. Or Blood, I suppose you call it.
ccccccccccccccccccccccccc- The Shadower