Get off the Ledge and Drop the Knife

*Gerard's POV*
The sunlight hit the room like a ton of bricks and woke me up. I groaned and got up from the bed, careful not to wake Frankie....WAIT. Why did I just wake up in Frankie's bed? And why were we cuddled? That's NOT what friends do, is it? I don't know. It kinda confuses me. I walked around Frank's room to check it out. I walked over to his dresser, which had picture frames on it. There were two pictures. One of a beautiful middle aged woman and one of three smiling older men. I assumed the one of the woman was his mother and I'm not too sure who the guys are. Probably relatives.
All of a sudden, a wave of diziness hit me. I cringed and grabbed my head, bending over. Fucking hangover. I don't remember much of last night. I just remember coming into Frank's apartment and crashing on the couch. But before that, Frank told me he sleeps naked...I whirled around. Yes, he does. I'm still dressed though, so we didn't have sex, right? I mean, I'll admit it. Frankie's attractive. I'd so do him. Especially if I was drunk. But I'm glad I didn't. Things would be awkward. He's my best friend I've had in a while, and I don't wanna ruin it. But still, hes so attractive. It gives me goosebumps. I watched him as his chest rose and fell while he peacefully slept. His face was so relaxed. He looked at ease. Suddenly, his face crumpled and something seemed to be worrying him.
"Gerard," he moaned. "Gerard, you can't save me. It's too late." His moan sounded full of lust, not pain. His eyes were still closed, so he must be dreaming. His body jolted and his eyes fluttered awake. I averted my eyes from his body, which wasn't covered by a sheet of any kind. He looked around the room, appearing to be registering it. He groaned and then his eyes landing on me and he blushed.
"Bad dream?" I asked. He nodded. "About me?" I pressed on.
He looked away, "Kinda. I mean you were in it."
"Wanna share?" I sat next to him on the bed.
He shook his head, then nodded, then shook his head again.
"Could you pass me my boxers? I kinda feel uncomfortable," he pointed towards his boxers laying on the floor. I went and picked them up, not caring that they were boxers and brought them to him.
"Thanks," he said sheepishly.
I nodded, "Frank," I said, making eye contact with him as soon as he got his boxers on, "Frank, it seems like you don't tell anyone about these dreams. You should. You should let it out"
Frank looked down, "I dream of killing myself. You try to save me, but you can't. I always end up dying," he shook as he told me. My heart kind of shattered right there. I saved myself before, I wanna save other people too.
"Why do you wanna kill yourself? Why can't I save you?" I asked him.
"Because, Gerard, I'm good for nothing. I'm ugly. I fuck things up. I don't deserve to live. You never save me because I made up my mind."
"So, why are you still alive in real life?"
"Because," he finally looked into my eyes, I'm looking for a reason to live."
And right then, I knew what my purpose was. Not for my whole life, but as of now. I need to give Frank something to live for. I felt there was something big when I first let him into my apartment.
I nodded and grabbed his hand, "C'mon, we're gonna go make pancakes."