That Friend of Mine
July
He gave me the number for CPS
Good, I would have…but I didn’t know if it was the best thing. I don’t know I guess it should have been me to do it.
Its fine, I still don’t what I’m going to do with it.
What do you mean don’t know? Your going to use it! How long do you think before teachers notice? Before calls are made, before you get seriously injured!?
….I know.
She told me three months ago, and still I had done nothing. Abso-freaking-lutely nothing. She had sprawling yellow and brown bruises across her ribcage, thick layers of cover up over her cheek bones, and I had just sat there with my mouth shut.
My justification? It was either an abusive mom, or a mentally unstable alcoholic father. Or foster care, which wasn’t even an option, considering she was already suicidal.
But then what? Where am I going to go?
You have like a gazillion aunts and Uncles.
Yeah but there like really far away.
You do what you have to do to get on with your life.
How could I make a decision, but how could I not? She was my best friend, and I waited until my brother finally had got her help.
I sent her one last text for the night, told her I had to go take a shower, then grabbed my clothes and walked into the bathroom.
The showers spray feebly bounced off my body. I leaned forward and twisted the knob to hotter, a sigh of loving relief escaping my lips as the steam rose and my skin began to turn red.
She’s going to be alright now.
She would have been better if you did something three months ago.
I slammed my fist into the tile wall, unable to ignore the voices at hand.
It doesn’t matter, she’s still alive because of you, doesn’t that count at all?
Yeah? Well what about the others you walked away from?
A hand absentmindedly reached to crank the water hotter.
You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved.
She wanted it.
My face pressed against the cool tile, a strange feeling of contrast between the water that slapped against me with little red stings.
I helped her best I could; the rest is up to her.
The voices silenced, I leaned in and turned the shower off.
Good, I would have…but I didn’t know if it was the best thing. I don’t know I guess it should have been me to do it.
Its fine, I still don’t what I’m going to do with it.
What do you mean don’t know? Your going to use it! How long do you think before teachers notice? Before calls are made, before you get seriously injured!?
….I know.
She told me three months ago, and still I had done nothing. Abso-freaking-lutely nothing. She had sprawling yellow and brown bruises across her ribcage, thick layers of cover up over her cheek bones, and I had just sat there with my mouth shut.
My justification? It was either an abusive mom, or a mentally unstable alcoholic father. Or foster care, which wasn’t even an option, considering she was already suicidal.
But then what? Where am I going to go?
You have like a gazillion aunts and Uncles.
Yeah but there like really far away.
You do what you have to do to get on with your life.
How could I make a decision, but how could I not? She was my best friend, and I waited until my brother finally had got her help.
I sent her one last text for the night, told her I had to go take a shower, then grabbed my clothes and walked into the bathroom.
The showers spray feebly bounced off my body. I leaned forward and twisted the knob to hotter, a sigh of loving relief escaping my lips as the steam rose and my skin began to turn red.
She’s going to be alright now.
She would have been better if you did something three months ago.
I slammed my fist into the tile wall, unable to ignore the voices at hand.
It doesn’t matter, she’s still alive because of you, doesn’t that count at all?
Yeah? Well what about the others you walked away from?
A hand absentmindedly reached to crank the water hotter.
You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved.
She wanted it.
My face pressed against the cool tile, a strange feeling of contrast between the water that slapped against me with little red stings.
I helped her best I could; the rest is up to her.
The voices silenced, I leaned in and turned the shower off.