Don't Get Lost in Heaven.

March 19, 2006. Sunday

I woke up to Oli's phone vibrating next to me; I opened my eyes as he reached for it.

"Wha do yeh wan'?

I looked up at him, his eyebrows furrowed and he looked down at me.

"Yeh busted 'er lip open and gave 'er a black eye an' yeh wan' me teh let yeh see 'er?"

I sat up now knowing who was on the other end of the line, who I had been crying over, having nothing but horrible thoughts about.

"Oli..." I whispered his name and he looked at me like he was angry with me for speaking.

"E' didn' do i' on purose. And 'e's my brother yeh can't no' let us see eachother."

Oli looked down and sighed.

"Where a'?"

He looked over at me.

"E wan's yeh to meet 'm at the diner by Ben's 'ouse wher'eva the fuck tha' is."

"I know where it is."

"Good, yeh can walk then."

He hung up his phone and left the room, me not knowing what time Danny wanted to meet me. I didn't care; I would wait days to see him.
As I was getting dressed I walked over the the window pulling the curtain back, it was raining and he was going to make me walk there.
I made my way down stairs in an eerie silence. Matt wasn’t there and neither was Tom. Curtis was probably asleep or not even here. And Oli was upset with me and he wouldn’t speak to me anyway. I grabbed Oli's jacket from the closet and walked out the door quickly before he could object to me wearing. I put the hood over my head and began walking. The diner really wasn't far in a car but on foot it could take a while.

After too long I arrived at the diner, a bell jingled above my head when the door opened. I looked up to look for Danny and we made eye contact instantly, when he saw me hurt washed across his face he walked over to me and hugged me tightly.

"M so sorry Sierra."

I didn't respond but only hugged him tighter.
He slightly pushed me back and looked at what he had done the other night. He rubbed his thumb along my eye and bit his lip.

"Danny don' worry, yeh didn't mean it."

"It doesn't matter if I didn't do it on purpose, I did it. I hurt you."

"Come on... Le's go sit down. We need to talk about something." He looked at me slightly confused.

"Sierra I wan' yeh to 'ome stay with an' Ben, 'e says i's okay, really 'e doesn't care at all an' 'e said tha' if yeh need a boyfriend 'e wouldn't mind bein' there."

I'm sure he wouldn't mind at all, I thought.

"Danny. I can't..."

"Sierra! Stop being so stupid! 'E isn't any good for yeh at all. "Ome stay with us please, Oli doesn't fucking own you!"

"Danny... Yeh makin' a scene stop."

"Why?"

"Why wha'?"

"Why can't yeh 'ome stay with us?"

"Danny." I looked down, afraid to speak my next sentence. I looked up at him and wanted to cry.

"Because.."

He grabbed my hands and forced me to stand.

"Danny wha' are yeh doin'?"

"Shut up. Grams is 'ere!"

"What?!" I turned around quickly and she saw us. She looked so terrible. She looked sick and alone.
I looked up at Danny and he was confused.

"Where 's Grumpy..." I quickly looked down knowing he could tell when I knew somthing.

"She's comin' over 'ere... Yeh wan' to talk to 'er Sierra?"

I turned to face the direction she was in and before she took another step she was pulled back a bit by a man who's face I didn't see at first until she spoke to him and they both looked at us.

It was Daddy.

Danny's hands started to shake around my own. He stepped back and pulled me along with him.

"Don't yeh come any closer to us."

I looked up at him again, his face was blank and he had tears threating to spill over, his lip was quivering also and it was at that moment I realized that Danny had been lying to me. He didn't miss daddy at all. He pulled me closer to him as to protect me. I turned to look at him. Daddy was looking at both of us not coming toward us but just looking at us. When he laid his eyes on my face he looked straight at Danny and he looked angry. It was then he started toward us and Danny walked backwards holding onto me.

"Get th' fuck away from me!"
Danny yelled brining attention to both of us.

"Yeh did tha' to 'er didn't yeh?!"

"Oh don' act like yeh care about us now."

Danny had led us to the other door and had one arm around me and the other pushing the door open. He grabbed my hand we ran out into the rain with Daddy following us but we ran until we couldn't see him anymore, hear him yelling after us. And we continued to run until we approached what I recognized as Ben's house. We ran into the door and both collapsed against the wall. He was breathing heavy and brought my face to his chest holding onto me. I started to cry and Ben walked into the front hall followed by James, they both just looked at us having no idea what had happened.

XXX

"Sierra?" I heard Danny on the other side of the door.

"Yeh can 'ome in, 'M dressed."

He walked in slowly and smiled at me. I was wearing a pair of Ben's pj pants and one of Danny's shirts which was too big on me.

"I need yeh to ask Oli... Ask 'm if I can ;ome back... Dad could 'ave seen where we are 'an I don' wan' anythin' to do with 'm, I don' wan' you to 'ave anythin' to do with 'im either."

I nodded.

"I nee' a phone to do tha'."

He walked over to me handing me a shitty pre-paid cell phone. I dialed the number and waited for the devil to answer.

"Wha'?! Jesus Christ!"

"Oli... I's me Sierra."

"Oh... Sorreh."

"I's a'right.... Oli..."

"No."

"But daddy is back, e's out of jail an' 'es 'ere, just for a little bit please?"

"No."

"Oli... Please. I might need him to be 'ere with me for... please." I wimpered please as if I was in pain.

"Just until then?"

"Yes, jus' until then and then yeh can make 'm leave again."

"A'right. No drugs for him, ever again."

"Okay! 'E wont I promise!"

"Do I need to 'ome get you? It's raining really heavy out there."

"Yes please."

"A'right... I'll be there soon."

He hung up and I handed Danny the phone.

"Jus' until wha?"

"Danny... Can we sit down?"

He sighed and I'm positive he knew what I was going to say to him. He sat down and put his face in his hands. I sat next to him.

"Don' say it... Please don' say it."