Tough Guy

“Fuck if that’s not enough for today.” I muttered, swiping sweat away from my brow and glaring up at my brother, “You lift, I’ll spot you.”

“No thanks.” He made a face. Brent was pretty much the opposite of me. He liked being laxy and pudgy and played the drums. He looked as much like dad as I did but in other ways and shared the Haner nose.

“Ah, I didn’t figure you would anyway. You were just a stand in for Jimmy.” I sighed and reached for a bottle of water.

He chuckled, “You let Jimmy spot you? He’s so skinny, he’d never be able to lift the weight off of you.”

I rolled my eyes, “Well Zacky doesn’t lift weights and Jimmy is trying to bulk up a bit.”

“What about that big guy? Matt, right?” Brent wasn’t sure about all of the guys yet. Even Zacky, who was constantly with me nowadays, was hard for him to remember.

“Yeah. We don’t see eye to eye. He’s more likely to drop the weights on me than to help me.” I laughed a little, “Of course, he’d just be surprised to see me lifting weights. He thinks I’m a pansy.”

He arched an eyebrow at me, “Why would he think that? You’re almost as big and muscled as him. That’s weird.”

“The first time we met was the day I let you experiment on my face.” I reminded him and he comprehended with a loud laugh.

“Now I get it. You looked like a drag queen! Sorry, man. Listen, Dad is performing at a club in L.A. tonight. Why don’t you invite all of your friends to go see him? He’d love it, he’s not seen you in forever.” This was true. I’d spent ninety percent of the past summer on Warped Tour with the guys and the rest in the studio or with the band writing.

“Alright, I’ll go call them.” I started with Zacky, who was always happy to hear from me and vice versa. We’d become super close, probably as close as we could get without dating or having sex, over the summer. I liked having him around way more than I had anticipated.

“Go see the Carnie Man show? Dude, I’d love to. Your dad is hilarious! You want to meet there or-“

I cut off the super-excited Zacky, “I’ll come pick you up, stop and get something to eat on the way. I’m going to invite Matt and Jimmy too . . .but we’ll just meet them there.”

“So kind of like a date?” Zacky’s voice was hopeful and I found myself giving in because I didn’t want to disappoint him and I was majorly tired of being single.

“Exactly like a date. That is, if you want it to be.” I had no fear with Zacky. He wasn’t like Matt or anyone else. He’d be delighted to go on a date with me and wouldn’t hide it.

“Of course I want it to be. What time you going to swing by?” I could almost hear the nervousness in his voice.

“About four-thirty.” I glanced up at the clock knowing that gave me plenty of time to shower and throw some clothes on and it would give Zacky time to primp.

I wasn’t disappointed when I pulled up to get him. He was sitting on his porch playing with a small white dog. When I got out, he set it inside and pulled the door closed, turning to face me in full-blown Vengeance glory. Zacky Baker was sort of beautiful. Zacky Vengeance was a glammed up version of him, complete with snake-bites, purple eyeshadow, and large green eyes rimmed with coal black eyeliner. He normally sat on my lap before a show, smearing that same shit under my eyes and down my cheeks to create my façade of Synyster Gates. I let him because we all wore make up on stage (even homophobic-wanna-be Matt) and it was pretty awesome looking. Not to mention, him sitting on my lap always made Matt jealous, which was one of the reasons I knew he did it too.

I smiled at him, “Hey, gorgeous, let’s go.”

His face tinged pink, “Brian, I am still a guy you know? You don’t have to compliment me or whatever.”

I shrugged, “I do it because I want to, not because I have to. Plus it’s the truth. You look great. Let’s go get something to eat.”

“Sure.” He slid into the passenger seat of my car, grunting a bit cause it was rather low-slung.

I smiled again and we took off. We ate dinner at a steakhouse and Zacky kept me from drinking since we still had another hour until we actually made it to L.A. and the club Dad was performing at. He asked as we were waiting on the check, “How come you wanted to go out on a date with me?”

“Because I like you?” I smirked, “Because we’ve liked each other since we first met and it’s nice to be with someone you like and are attracted to?”

“Alright, fine. Mine and Matt’s past doesn’t bother you?” He frowned at me, “Cause I mean, it’s obvious you guys are attracted to each other.”

“No, we’re not. Matt’s not my type. He’s too huge and . . .too much like me.” I shook my head, “You’re more my type.”

“Okay.” He nodded and smiled at me again just as the waiter brought the check. I paid and we drove the other hour into the city. We walked around and stuff until the time to go meet the guys. I slipped my hand into Zacky’s as we approached the club, ready to stake my claim on him.

He clutched my hand back, “Are you sure, Bri? I mean, Matt will never let up on the pansy shit now.”

“It’s fine. I can handle it.” I shrugged and drew him closer to me.

Matt and Jimmy and my dad were all standing together. I gulped because I hadn’t thought of telling my dad I was officially dating a guy. My sexuality had sort of been a moot point with us but then again, I’d never really introduced him or Suzy, my stepmom, to my boyfriends. Zacky stroked my hand, “Are you sure-“

“Yes, Zee, I’m sure.” I turned to him and smiled, “My parents are fine with me and will be with you too.”

He blew out a breath, “I hope so, Bri. “

We walked up and Dad hugged me, “Hey, son. I’m glad you guys came. I’ve met Matt, so who is this?”

“This is Zacky Baker, my . . .” I turned to Zack, biting my lip and he laughed a little. I grinned and turned back, “boyfriend?”

Dad laughed, “You sound so certain. Don’t worry about it, Zack, Brian’s a little daft sometimes. And not the cool kind of daft, but the completely lame kind. Well, your brother saved you guys some seats over around the front. Enjoy the show.” He hugged me again, shook the guys’ hands, and took off for the stage. I looked around for Brent and we joined them.

After Dad had been busting jokes for a while, Zacky, who had taken the seat closest to me and quickly got uncomfortable when Matt sat on his other side, decided he needed to take a leak. He murmured this in my ear as well as that he’d bring me a drink on his way back before getting up. Matt waited until he left and moved over to his seat. He nudged me, “What’s with you and Zacky? You two decide to hook up?”

“Yeah.” I nodded, trying to focus on what my dad was saying.

“God, what does he see in you? You’re a fucking pansy.” He spat.

Not this shit again! “Look, put away your jealousy and can it. I care about Zack and I just want him to be happy. If you gave a rat’s ass about him at all, you’d want that too. Whether it’s you that makes him that way or not. And I’m not a fucking pansy.” I looked over at him, “You can drop that shit now.”

“I could but it gets to you. It eats at your mind like a disease. I like fucking with you, your face gets all high and mighty when I do. It’s fun.” He smirked at me, “Your Zacky is coming back. Let’s see how he reacts to having to switch me spots.”

He sat the drink down in front of me and frowned at Matt. When he started to go sit down in Matt’s now vacant chair, I reached over and grabbed his wrist. He let out an “oomph!” of surprise when I pulled him down onto my lap. He laughed a little though and let me loop my arm around him. Matt huffed after a few moments. However, Zacky didn’t get up. He simply turned to me and stuck a cigarette in my mouth. He lit it for me and we shared it as we watched the rest of the show.

Dad was talking about his family in between funny songs. He talked about McKenna, my little sister, and how funny she was. He talked about divorcing my real mom and how Suzy reminded him every day of what a wonderful idea it was. Brent was the object of a few of his jokes and then he turned to me.

“One of the best things that came out of my first marriage was my first son, my namesake. Brian Haner, Jr., came out as a beautiful bouncing baby boy. Try saying that ten times fast. The first time he put his hands on a guitar, he became my entire world. I am so proud of him . . .he’s an awesome kid. So awesome that when he came up to me tonight to introduce me to his boyfriend, I didn’t even care. I’m glad to see him happy. I’m also glad to see him in a band with three other guys who are just as talented as him. But always when I see him play I think . . .I taught him to be that cool!” He tore into one of my more familiar guitar riffs and the crowd laughed. He beamed a smile, “I just hope no one thinks I taught him his pick-up lines.”

Matt chuckled along with most of the rest of the crowd and smirked at me. I stuck my tongue out at him, “Dad wished he could get eye-candy like Zack.”

Zacky smacked my arm and laughed a little and I gave him a squeeze, just glad that he wasn’t protesting to my very public affection. Matt huffed and picked up his drink, “I need a refill, I’ll be back.”

Who cared? I was just glad he was walking away instead of causing trouble. I figured Zack would want his chair back since Matt got up, but he didn’t. I didn’t mind. He was comfortable and I liked having someone in my arms again.

Jimmy asked if he could ride back to Huntington Beach with us. I arched an eyebrow, “Didn’t you ride in with Matt?”

“Yeah but he looks sort of pissed and he’s already got a form of road rage I can’t handle sober.” Jimmy shuddered.

I looked over my shoulder at Matt, who was talking to Brent and Suzy. I shrugged, “Yeah, man, but I gotta talk to the parents for a few and give McKenna some loves before we leave.”

“Yeah, that’s cool.” He nodded, “Zack, why don’t you go talk to Matt?”

“Th-that’s okay.” Zacky shook his head, “We’ll talk some other time.”

Jimmy frowned, “You know you’re the only one who can calm Matt’s temper down, Zee. Don’t let him drive home like that.”

Zacky glanced at me and I knew what he was thinking. We were the reason Matt was mad and Zacky talking to him could possibly make it worse. I sighed, “Go talk to him, babe. I’ll be to the car in a few.”

“Okay.” He sighed and I kissed his cheek before going over to my family. Suzy passed McKenna off to me and I hugged her hard before hugging both her and my dad. Brent gave me a handshake and held his hands out for the sleepy little sister we both adored. She shook her head solemnly and clung to my neck. I rubbed her back, “I’ll have to give you back to Mommy in a few, McK. I have to take Jimmy and Zacky home.”

Dad cocked his head, “So how did you and Zacky hook up? This is an interesting development.”

“We’ve sort of been working on it since we first met. Off and on between other relationships, that is. We’re both ready for it and . . .well, it pisses Matt off so that’s a plus.” I laughed a little.

Suzy frowned at me, “Pissing off a member of your band isn’t a good idea, junior.”

“I know, but he is constantly ragging on me so I figure fair play, you know? Anyway, Zacky and Matt . . .I don’t know, it’s just weird.” I shrugged, “I like it though. He’s a great guy.”

Dad gave me a look, “One that you’re going to hurt if you aren’t careful. We’ll see you at home, son. Maybe you and I can go to the shooting range tomorrow.”

“Sounds awesome. I’m glad to have some time off where all I have to do is go record for an hour or so a day. I’ll see you guys at home. Night, McKenna.” I kissed her forehead and handed her off to Dad.

When I got back, Zacky looked upset and it took the whole two hour drive back to Huntington Beach to get it out of him what went wrong. Just as I pulled up in front of his house, he spilled, “Matt says he hopes you and I fail horribly because he’d rather see me alone than with you.”

“How fucked up is this guy?” I growled low in my throat, “What is his fucking problem?”

Jimmy laughed from the backseat, “He doesn’t know who he likes more, Brian, you or Zacky and it pisses him off that he likes either of you because he doesn’t want to be gay.”

It was twice in one night that I’d been told Matt liked me. I rolled my eyes, “He needs to get over it and get under someone who can make him forget about either of us. He fucked up with Zacky and I don’t do guys like him so it’s not going to happen.”

“So says the guy who springs a boner whenever you two argue . . .” Jimmy snorted again.

I felt my face flush scarlet. Who else had noticed that? When I glanced over at Zacky, he was kind of laughing a little. I mouthed an apology at him and he shrugged, “It’s no big deal. I spring one when watching you two argue, so I guess it’s fair. The power play is enough to get anyone horny. Even straight ass Jimmy feels it.”

“Oh, no, Baker-boy. I feel nothing until I have a nice set of tits and a bouncing little ass in front of me. Don’t even go there.” Jimmy laughed and we joined in, easing the tension in the car. At least Zacky knew he had no reason to be threatened by whatever sexual tension there was between me and Matt. Now if only I knew that for sure.