Love Is Hard

The minute I heard the buzzer and heard Justin's voice over the intercom I had butterflies in my stomach. The few seconds it would take him to get into the elevator and come to floor 7. Those few seconds felt like I was getting older.

I knew he was for me. The way he stood at the door and knocked before I opened the door, his smile when I opened the door. There were white lily's in his hand, one of my 3 favorite flowers. I took them from him put them on the table next to the door and hugged him, he hugged back. It was silent. I could hear his breathing steady like he was nervous, heck I was nervous. He smelt good too.

Then he spoke, "I heard those were your favorite, one's you aren't allergic too." I smiled, "How do you know my favorite flower and that I'm allergic to certain ones?" He laughed, "I did some research, you do know I am Justin Bieber?" I laughed.

"No seriously," I said, "Just have some connections," he said not cracking his serious-ness. "No really Justin just tell me," I said trying to know who, "It was your sister," how had he contacted my sister. Eh whatever it was fine.

He grabbed my hand and we went out to the front where his car was parked. He opened the passenger for me and once I was in he closed it. He got in the drivers side and he started going. He kept going too, so I turned on the radio. "No don't turn," the music was on. The radio was quiet at first then I realized it wasn't the radio, it was a CD and the music that was playing wasn't a song you would hear on the everyday radio, in fact I hadn't heard it in a couple years. I started to hum along. He turned and looked at me while driving, he smiled.

I started to sing, the song was Isn't She Lovely. I hadn't realized that I was singing until I stopped myself. He looked at me and laughed, then some other songs came on, She Will Be Loved and it was a good playlist. I was amazed Justin still listened to these songs.

I sang the entire way there and realized we were driving for more than an hour.

"Where are we going?" I asked a bit confused. "The best coffee shop in California," he replied, "Don't worry we are almost there," he continued, "Since when have you been singing?" I laughed, "That wasn't singing that was fooling around," he smiled and laughed. I pushed his arm and he pulled into a little cafe, barely anyone was here.

"How do you know this place exists?" I asked.

"Well 3 years ago, I got in a fight with my mom and drove off, I just kept going down a road and found this place, the 2 cars there are the 2 people that work there. They don't get much business. But I'm sure to always leave a good tip for them, they are an old couple and its cute to see people like that, kind of like my grandparents." He said with a slight smile on his face.

It was nice to see him smile. I heard my phone ring in seconds, it was my mom.

I answered,"Mom?"

"Honey, it's Aliah," I panicked when she her name.

"Mom, what?" I tried not to start crying, Justin looked at me funny.

"She's not eating so I brought her to the hospital she's on an IV and she's sleeping, she's fine, but I just wanted to tell you,"

"How long has she not been eating?" I asked, my motherly instincts were rushing through me.

"She had a peanut butter sandwich when you dropped her off, cereal the next morning and mac & cheese that day, that night she barfed it up. It's kind of been like that for the past 3 days, you were like that when you were little, I remember getting worried about you, but yours passed within 3 days, Aliah's isn't. I think she's sick. The doctors have to run tests, but I told them to wait until you got here to do those."

"Mom your at the children's hospital right?" I asked so worried.

"Yes, she's sleeping so don't rush. She's fine right now, but just get here soon." She hung up. I hung up and the tears were already streaming down my face.

"Justin, please just get me to the children's hospital please. I will explain on the way there."

The ride was different, instead of me singing to old songs, I was leaning my head against the window and crying. I explained it to Justin and he understood. He told me he would stay, I said he didn't have to. But he said he wanted to. I said if he wanted to. We got to the children's hospital and I went to the main desk, "Where is Aliah Jansen?" I asked, trying to calm myself.

"Is she your daughter?" I nodded. "Your mother told me you would be coming, you have to sign these papers." I nodded again. "What are they?" I asked. "Just the papers for the tests they have to do." I read over everything and signed them. One of them needed the fathers' signature. Justin was there with me and I went to ask the lady what I should do. "What if the father isn't here?" I asked her.

"Well isn't that young boy with you her father?" She asked. I shook my head. "Her father is dead." I sighed. What a long day. I just wanted to see my daughter.

I handed over the papers and the nurse told me she would deal with it. I nodded and she directed me to 5th floor room R-21. Justin held my hand all the way there. The elevator could not have been any slower.

We stopped at the 2nd floor and some people got on. Justin turned to face me, "Hey, she's gonna be ok, I promise." He kissed my forehead and hugged me. His hug felt so good right now. We got to floor 5 and got out. The smell of the hospital was gross.

I swiftly walked to R-21 and opened the door. There was my mom sitting in a chair in the corner with my baby girl laying in the big bed, with all the wires attached and everything. It was scary. I was scared.

Justin came from behind me and held on tight, I felt like I was going to pass out. I went over to hug my mom. Then the doctor came in. He was talking and I was trying to listen.

"So the first set of tests are just basic cold, virus, things like that." He continued on, "If everything is negative we will go to flu and advances from the flu," and then he said it, "If needed we will go to the more heavier tests." I was confused.

"Heavier tests?" I asked. I knew it was going to be like bad diseases and stuff but she's only 3. She was all I had to live for.

"Don't worry, I'm sure we won't go there, but it is just a precaution we always tell parents." I nodded. "So if you don't mind waking her up." I nodded and walked over to my daughter. I shook her awake and when she saw me her eyes widened open and she hugged me.

"Mommy, I miss you." I smiled, "Mommy missed you too, But this very nice lady is going to help you but she has to ask me some questions. Why don't you just talk to Justin ok?" She nodded, Justin came over and looked at me, "Just for a minute while I talk to the doctor."

I walked over to my mom and the doctor, "So when was she feeling like this?" She asked my mom, "Well, actually, I was pretty upset and I really wasn't paying attention to her, so that's why I dropped her off at my mom's but she really wasn't eating that day so 4 days." I answered her.

"Ok, so did she have a fever and diarrhea or was it just vomit?" I looked at my mom because Ali had not been in my care. "She was vomiting and had a fever." The doctor nodded, "Well I'm just going to tell you now, she is dehydrated, she needs water and we have her on the IV right now so it's alright but we will run some tests, I think she might have a form of the flu, common with children is the stomach flu, normally only lasts 9 days, so I will do that test first because it's the one I believe is the one she has." I nodded.

"The thing is we need a stool sample," I smiled, "Well thats great." She handed me gloves and a little container. "The results won't be back for 2 days and so we just want to keep Aliah here if that's ok, just so it won't get worse." I nodded in agreement. But seeing my daughter in the hospital was the worse.