Love Is Hard

Aliah came home from the hospital yesterday afternoon, and since then she has been nothing but cranky.

She wouldn't eat the stuff she had to eat to stay healthy. I had to practically shove it down her throat. I was tired and annoyed. Today I was taking Ali to the doctors so they could check her, since she was young and I called and told them she wasn't really eating the food required. I found out that her yearly checkup was next week so they moved it to today too.

Justin was coming too. He called and asked what I was doing today and I told him so he wanted to come. I feel bad for him. He really didn't have to go everywhere with us but he did.

When I got up Aliah was sitting in the living room, she didn't wake me up like every other morning.

"Why are you just sitting out here?" She shrugged her shoulders. I went to sit next to her, "Ready for breakfast?" She shook her head. "Aliah you need to eat," She shook her head, "Aliah please, you're going to get sick, just eat," She shook her head again, "Aliah Delaney Jansen eat," I was strict and loud towards her, she looked at me and tears started falling from her eyes and in seconds she was bawling and screaming and I didn't know what to do. Then I heard my phone beep.

Ava I'm here, want me to come up?

I looked at the time. It was 11. The appointment was at 1 but Justin must have come early or something.

Come up, Aliah won't eat for me. Maybe you can get her to.

Then I heard the buzzer and I clicked it so he could come up. Aliah was still crying,"Aliah please eat, honey, want some water?" She shook her head. I wiped the tears from her eyes, she was in pain I could tell, "Are you hungry?" She nodded her head, "Then why won't you eat?" She had to talk now it wasn't a yes or no question, "Mommy, I wanna eat, I don't like puking." She was just afraid of puking.

"Aliah, if you eat you won't puke but when we go to the doctors today they might have to give you medicine and I know you won't like it so you better eat something," She nodded. I went to get a piece of bread, "Do you want bread or toast?" I asked her, "Toast," I nodded and then I heard a knock, "Aliah get the door it's Justin," She ran over to the door and Justin was standing there.

"Hey Ali, how's the big girl doing?" He asked picking her up. She shrugged her shoulders. Justin put her down and knelt down and started to tickle her, "Justin, she needs rest, no fooling around," I was trying to get her better. He stood back up and walked over to me, "Really? I know, I'm trying to cheer her up, you might not see it but she's not happy, she's sick and you are what making toast? Is she even going to eat it?" I looked at him, how could he be so judging of how I raised my daughter?

"Just leave Justin, leave," He looked at me and I started to cry, I started to get louder, "Leave please," He just stood there and then he hugged me, I kept crying. I don't know why I didn't pull away or something but I stood there and cried in his arms. Then the toaster popped up, I jumped a bit and I wiped the tears from my eyes. I grabbed the plate for Aliah and put the toast on it. I got a cup and filled it with water.

I put it at the table, "Aliah come eat," She came over and looked at the toast, she sat down and began to pick at it.

I looked back at Justin, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't judge how you parent, she's not my daughter she's yours," I smiled, "Well I better go get ready because I'm still in my pajamas." I said laughing. He smiled, "I think you look hot," Justin said as I walked away. I laughed and when I got to my room I smiled. Even though he kind of hurt me this morning I was all better now and well he made me happy.

I didn't shower, I just quickly changed and french braided my hair. I grabbed my purse that I got as a birthday gift when I turned 19 from my mom. I looked in the mirror one more time and decided that I looked pefectly fine.

I walked back out and Justin was sitting at the table with Aliah. She was laughing and he was just looking at me. He winked and I smiled. "Aliah come lets go get ready," She came over, she was in a better mood today and it might make going to the doctors. She ran to her room and went to her closet.

She pointed to a dress, she loved wearing dresses, I was happy she was a girl at heart, when I was little I loved to wear dresses. So I figured I would let her wear the dress. I helped her get dressed and she picked out the shoes and I brushed her hair.

When I finished getting her all ready Justin was waiting at the door. "All ready?" I nodded and Aliah didn't say anything. She knew what was next, the doctors. Justin picked her up and moved her to the side and took his other arm and put it around me and kissed the top of my head. Then I heard him whisper, "She's going to be fine," I smiled and we walked to the elevator back to the bottom floor, headed for the hospital.