Love Is Hard

When I came back out to Justin to talk to him he was still eating, in fact I think he finished the rest of the pasta. There was nothing left. I smiled. I sat next to him while he ate.

"Hungry?" He nodded. "Justin, you shouldn't do that, you need to take care of yourself, your mom was worried about you, before we talk please call her, she just needs to know you're ok," He nodded again and kept eating,"I want to tell you about the choices I have made to your questions," He stopped, he looked up and stared at me, his eyes got wide and I started to speak,"I would love to come to Canada with you, but I have one condition, try not to rush this relationship," He smiled,"I haven't been trying to rush it, it's just been rushed, I didn't want to hurt you, I wanted to make you feel comfortable about dating again."

"Justin, you have, you are the one guy that has done that for me," He smiled and I did too, "So I'm guessing New Years in New York is a no?" I nodded,"That's far and I have Ali, I don't want to bring her somewhere, where it's going to be crazy, I want to spend it at home watching it on television while she sleeps in her own bed." He nodded,"I understand."

"Go call your mom, we can finish when you get back," Justin stood up after finishing the last bit of pasta he had, and took out his phone, he dialed numbers and began to talk, "Sorry, I was just too upset about stuff, I should've called I know," he walked out of the room before I could hear anything else.

About 10 minutes later I heard walking back into the room. "So is everything ok?" He looked at me and nodded.

"So in 4 days my best friend in the entire world is coming to visit, do you want to come to the airport to get her?" I asked him. "Sure I think Ryan is coming out here next week too. He's was gonna come in the airplane back to Canada to keep me company. He doesn't know about you." I smiled. "She doesn't know about you." He laughed.

"Anyways, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have just left without telling you goodbye or explaining myself. I'm sorry." He shook his head, "Don't be sorry, it's my fault I was so upset. I don't even know why. Just because I didn't understand why you had to leave, I guess."

"So,what should we do?" I asked, he sat down next to me and he looked at me,"I have no idea," I laughed. "Can I just tell you, I found that cd, when did you put in my car?" He smiled, "Well there is something called car keys, something called you sleep, and I wake up early and pretend to be asleep when you wake up," I playfully hit him, "You were so sleeping when I woke up." He shook his head and laughed.

The next few days I spent with him and Aliah kind of. Everyday around 2 he would have to leave to get ready for his convert and stuff. Soon he wasn't going to be able to visit at all because he was going to be in rehearsals and stuff. It upset me that I wasn't going to be able to see him, because then he was going to be gone for 6 months. Yeah he got it switched to 6.

Tomorrow Bailey was coming and I was so excited. I couldn't wait to see her. She called me to tell me to remember to pick her up. I told her I wouldn't forget, her flight was landing at 1:20. I told her I was going to be alone, but that was a lie. Justin was going to be there, Aliah was going with my mom. My mom offered because that way Bailey and I could have girl time. I didn't tell her Justin was driving me there.

It might have made her go over the edge again. But right now they were on good measures and I was happy everything was going smoothly. I was trying to clean everything in the house to make it perfect and cleaning up Ali's toys was the worse.There seemed to be more and more when I cleaned them up.

I heard my phone ringing so I answered it.

"Hey Ava," it was Justin, "Yes?"

"Can I come over?" I looked at how crazy the house was and looked at the mess I still had to clean, and had to do laundry, wash all the bed sheets and make lunch for Ali.

"Come over, but you have to keep Ali company I need to clean."

"Well the thing is, I have someone I want you to meet, maybe I shouldn't make you meet him if you are cleaning," it had to be Ryan, Justin has been waiting until he was coming.

"No come, just give me 15 minutes." I hung up after saying goodbye. I ran to go and change and straighten my hair, I slipped on a tank top and shorts. I looked ok, not perfect but then I ran around and tried to make the house look a little nicer.

I texted Justin.

Warn Ryan about it not being as clean as normal

He didn't text back, not that I would've known because I wasn't even paying attention. Soon I heard the buzzer to the apartment and I went to click it. Ali was watching cartoons and I was getting ready to put sheets in the washing machine. I heard a knock on my door and ran to it.

"Hey," I said to Justin and hugged him and then he turned and spoke, "Ava this is Ryan, Ryan this is Ava." I smiled and shook his hand when he put it out in front of me. Aliah ran over to my side, "Ryan this is my daughter, Aliah. Ali honey thats Justin's friend, Ryan." I said.

Ryan looked at Justin and he smiled at him. Justin must have not told Ryan that I had a daughter. I let them walk through the door. "Justin please keep her occupied, I am going to make lunch soon, ok? But let me just finish cleaning, Bailey is coming tomorrow and I want it to look halfway decent." I laughed as he ignored me, but I went along with cleaning and as I was walking back into the room I heard Ryan and Justin talking,"Why didn't you tell me?" "You mean that she had a daughter? Didn't think it was a big deal." "Justin that is a big deal, thats like rushing into things a little too quick don't you think." Justin wasn't defending me at all,"Well I mean it's not bad that she has Ali. I don't think its a problem." He called Aliah it.

I felt the need to cry maybe because I needed to cry. I was stressed out from cleaning and I just wanted to take a break. A break from having to take care of Ali, giving her baths and feeding her, reading her books to go to bed, and everything. I let tears run from my eyes and continued to clean. I went to the living room and began to pick up everything in there. Justin must have noticed something was wrong.

"Ava you ok?" I nodded as he asked. "I'm fine, just stressed." I answered. "Are you sure?" I answered again,"Yes, I'm fine."

"Ava are you alright?" He asked again and I broke,"No," I yelled,"I'm tired, I hate cleaning, I hate having to be a mom, I hate how you just told Ryan nothing of why I even have Ali and I hate everything, I just wish my life was normal, no you, no Ali, no LA, no anything. I love my daughter but there is too much in front of me to have to have to deal with," I broke down crying. Justin held me close even though I couldn't stand him at the moment.

"Go take a rest, I will clean up and make lunch ok?" I looked at him, wiping the tears from eyes. He walked me to my room and I laid down. He covered me up with the sheets and I closed my eyes. I heard the bedroom door close and I fell asleep.

When I woke up I looked at the clock it was 2:47. I heard talking and smelt food. I got out of bed, I felt better, a lot better. A three hour nap wasn't that bad.

I walked out of the room and I went to the living area and heard talking from the kitchen, I walked over and Justin looked up. Ryan and Ali were sitting at the table too. I smiled and Justin started to talk,"You all better?" I nodded,"Yeah, I am, Ryan I am really sorry, I don't normally act like that, I just have been stressed," He nodded,"Don't worry, Justin told me everything, about Aliah and you, don't stress out everyone needs a break every once in a while." I smiled.

"Thanks for understanding, my life has never been easy, divorced parents, dead boyfriend/husband whatever to call him, and raising a daughter, never easy." He nodded. "Anyways Ryan has been playing games while I was cleaning, everything is all perfect for tomorrow," Justin had told me,"Thank you, both of you."

"You hungry?" Justin asked,I shook my head. I wasn't hungry at all. I just wanted to hang out now, with Ryan and Justin and my daughter.

The next day came quickly and soon it was 12. I was getting ready to leave for the airport soon so I put on my clothes. I grabbed the sunglasses and texted Justin.

When you going to be here?I'm all ready. If you don't text back I know you have already left.Ali is already with my mom. Remember you didn't come today haha.

I received a text soon after.

This is Ryan, Justin is driving, he says we will be there in 10 minutes, he says "I was never here" Anyways see you soon.

I didn't text back. It was kind of weird texting Justin knowing Ryan would reply. They were here before I knew it and I walked out of the apartment and went to the car. Ryan got out of the front seat and went to the back, "Justin told me to let you sit there," he said laughing, ratting out Justin.

I laughed getting in the car. By the time we left it was about 12:15 and knowing LAX it was going to be packed. Traffic was never a simple task at that airport. When we got closer, it was around 1. Justin and Ryan kept the ride very entertaining.

When it was around 1:15 I texted Bailey. I knew she might have been here by now so I just wanted to let her know that we were here. When we got to baggage claim I jumped out of the car. I ran into the airport so I would be there when she came. Then I got a text.

I'm here. Going to baggage claim.

I was excited basically jumping out of my clothes waiting for her. I was thinking in my head how this was going to work out. She was going to run to me and I was going to run to her, jumping into each others arms hugging and laughing and being best friends. Since I was so spaced out I didn't even realize her standing right in front of me until she said my name,"Ava," then I smiled,"Bailey!" I said her name so loud.

She looked different, she looked like she had gained 10 pounds. Nothing against her, I would love her if she gained 50 pounds or lost 50 pounds. She was wearing baggy clothes and carrying a bag lugging 2 suitcases behind her. I thought she was visiting. What did she bring with her?

I hugged her tight and then I helped her with her suitcases,"I have a surprise for you," I said.

"What is it?" She asked quickly,"More like who is it?" She got wide eyed,"Well who?" I laughed,"My boyfriend, Justin is here," She nudged her shoulder at me,"Ooohh boyfriend," I laughed and rolled my eyes,"Where is my favorite goddaughter?" I smiled,"With my mom for the night, she thought we could use some girl time."

We got to the car and she practically hit me when she saw Justin in the front seat,"You did not tell me your boyfriend was Justin Bieber!" I looked at her,"Didn't know it was that important." I shrugged my shoulders and hit the window so Justin looked at me. He got out of the car and I introduced them,"Justin this is Bailey,Bailey this is Justin, my boyfriend,"She smiled and shook his hand. He went to the back of the car and popped the trunk open. He put the suitcases in there and opened the back door for Bailey to get in.

She was introduced to Ryan quickly and they began to talk. I was sitting in the front and Justin began talking to me,"You happy she's here?" I nodded,"Of course, she's my best friend." He laughed, "Like Ryan, I guess." I nodded,"A lot like Ryan."

As Justin drove away from the airport it seemed a lot quicker. It was actually the ride out of the airport and to my apartment was quicker. When we arrived Justin and Ryan helped Bailey carry everything to my apartment and once we were there, Justin kissed me quickly goodbye and it was Bailey and me time.