Love Is Hard

I enjoyed the morning with Pattie, Justin and Ali. We ate our breakfast which ended up being a lot more because Justin called room service and ordered more. I had really looked at the room, it was beautiful. The two beds were perfect and there was a television hanging from the wall, there was just a small little balcony with a small table and two chairs looking out over everything. The room had drawer and closet space with a round table with four chairs for people to sit at. It was quaint, I knew it must have cost loads of money because Pattie, Justin and most likely everyone else had a room just like this one.

"Well that was a great morning," Justin said smiling and stretching as he sat in the chair.

"It was perfect!" I said a little bit too loud and a little bit too excited. He just started to laugh. "Well I'm going to leave you three here, have fun and Justin if you are planning on leaving please let me know." He nodded and we said goodbye to Pattie.

"So what are we going to do today?" He shrugged his shoulders, "Have you ever been here before? What do you want to do?" I looked over at Aliah whose hair was a mess and she was avidly watching the cartoons on the screen in front of her.

"Well, I vaguely remember coming here when I was really little when I was probably Ali's age. I remember my dad taking me and Jess out for lunch somewhere while my mom met with some guy for a meeting. But thats really it. So we can do whatever," he smiled.

"Do you miss him?" He asked. "Who my dad? Everyday, I think I miss him just as much if not more than Dylan." He nodded, "It's understandable, thats your dad. He was there for you since the day you were born. It's totally understandable." I shook my head.

"I just wish he was here. He is missing everything. He missed Ali growing up," Justin looked at me longingly, "Are you sure thats all your upset about? I mean he missed you too. You were pretty important to him I'm sure."

I felt like crying, so I just stood up and walked to the bathroom where Ali couldn't see me. I didn't want her to see me cry. In truth Justin was right. My dad wasn't just missing Ali, she was missing me and missing Jess and I just was upset. I sat down on the floor in the bathroom and put my head in my hands and sobbed.

I heard a knock at the door and I heard the door open. "Did I upset you?" He asked sitting down next to me. I shook my head and looked at him. He wiped the tears from my eyes with his finger. "I just miss him, you were right." He hugged me tightly.

I heard little feet running and I saw Ali look in the doorway. She ran over and hugged Justin and I both. I laughed a little and it was just funny.

Justin stood up and began to tickle Ali. She fell to the ground laughing, it was hilarious. It made me smile. Her little giggle was so perfect. I stood up and wiped the tears that remained on my face.

"So what are we doing today?" I asked once again.

"How about I take you two out to see the city. It's a perfect day." I smiled and nodded. "Well I need to change and she needs to change, so leave." I said smiling. Ali ran out the door and back to the television and Justin looked at me, "You want me to leave do you?" He came towards me and began to tickle me. Game on.

I ran away as fast as I could out to the other room and grabbed a pillow. I hit him with it as soon as he came towards me, "Justin stop." I begged but he just took the pillow from my hands threw it on the floor and came towards me.

He picked me up and threw me down on the bed. I was just laughing he lowered his face down to mine and was about a centimeter away from kissing me but he didn’t.

“I’m sorry, I’m being kicked out right now. So no kisses.” He stood up and helped me stand up too. I smiled.

“Ali and I will come to your room when we are ready.” I said and he nodded and I watched him walk out the door.

I dressed myself into this cute outfit. I was wearing heels because I really just wanted to feel taller and they were really comfortable too. I put Ali in something warm because I did not want her to be complaining the whole day of being cold.

Once we were done I walked out the hotel door with my purse and Ali’s hand in mine. We walked over to Justin’s door and I told her to knock so she did. It wasn’t loud at all. So I did the same I knocked on the door and he came and answered the door.

“Ready to go?” He asked. I nodded my head. “Ready to go Ali-bug?” She looked up at him and smiled, “Yes.” She said it so cute.

He took my hand and closed his room door. We walked down to Pattie’s room. Knocking on it, she had answered and we told her where we were going. She said it was ok, and to have a nice day enjoying everything.

We got into the elevator and Justin he helped Ali press the button to go to the lobby. Standing there Justin put his arm around me and whispered in my ear, “I really love you,” I smiled. He was too perfect. I kissed him quickly, I didn’t like kissing him in front of Ali even though it really was not that big of a deal.

When the elevator door opened the three of us walked out. “Ali you need to hold my hand.” I said to her but she firmly shook her head no. I looked at her, “You have to.” She shook her head once again. Justin spoke, “What about me?” She shook her head again. He smiled, he picked her up and flew her around she just was laughing.

He really did love both of us. It was perfect. He was perfect. He put her down and knelt down and said something but I didn't hear what. He stood up and Ali took his hand. She had really grown to liking him and she had been calling him dad every so often on the phone or on video chat but she hadn't yet here.

We walked outside and I felt the brisk air touch my cheeks. It felt like the winters in Michigan. It was beautiful, the only thing missing was snow. There were people everywhere, it was different than L.A. for sure. I followed Justin to the car waiting for us in the front and we got in the back.

He told the driver where to go but I didn't hear.

Ali began to talk and I wasn't paying attention. I was watching around me, looking out the window and admiring the city around me. Landing last night I saw the lights from every building but seeing it during the day was something different.

We spent the day with each other. Justin brought Ali and I to all the great sights in New York. After lunch he had to go to a radio interview and he said we could go we did.

It was funny because everyone there knew who he was but when they asked who we were he just said his friends from here. He obviously didn't want to tell them we were dating or anything like that so I just dealt with it.

The interviewer who I couldn't remember the name of for the life of me kept asking Justin questions and I could tell he was getting annoyed,

"Do you have a girlfriend as of now?" He asked. "I mean there is definitely someone that I am interested in." Justin not giving a clear answer to the guy at all. "Is there a possible chance of you guys dating?" Justin nodded his head, "I'm sure it will happen but I just want to take some time."

"So what's been happening between you and Selena lately?" Selena? They hadn't been dating for like 2 years whats with this name bomb drop? "Well she visited me on tour in Florida last week and she came and sang a few songs, we caught up. It was really nice."

He didn't tell me about that. "How has tour been?" He answered, "I love tour, I honestly could do it forever, it just gets tiring sometimes being in a different state every 2 or 3 days. It's like move, move, move and I sometimes just want to rest. But as I have been getting older its become easier for me to adjust."

"That's good, we are going to play some music and we will be right back." Justin stood up from the mic and walked over towards me and a sleeping Ali. I was sitting on the couch and her head was in my lap.

He opened up the mini-fridge and grabbed a water.

"How come you didn't tell me about Selena?" I asked quietly.

"I just didn't think it was that important." He answered shaking his head.

"That important? Justin I don't want to be controlling or annoying but I am your girlfriend, I should just know those things ok?" He shook his head and took a sip of water, "Let's just talk about it later," He walked back over to the chair he had been sitting in before and continued the interview.

I pulled out my phone and didn't care to listen at all. I felt like he had kept something from me, and he had. I just wasn't ok with being his girlfriend so far away from him.

At the end of the radio interview Justin carried Ali out to the car and I walked beside him. It was about 6 and the sun was setting just a bit, so the sky was a beautiful color.

"Are you going to talk to me?" I heard him ask.

"Are you going to continue to keep things from me?" I asked.

He didn't say anything for a few seconds so I looked back out the window to the sky and admired it. I felt a tear forming but I blinked it away before it could fall. I felt his arm wrap around me and pull me towards him.

"I'm sorry Ava, I am so sorry." I heard him say. "We honestly did nothing. I swear on my entire life." I smiled, "I know you did nothing, but Justin its the fact you didn't even tell me she was at your show. I tell you everything about school and who I talk to so you don't get mad at me. I would just expect the same from you." He nodded his head. Ali was still taking her little nap and I decided to wake her up before we pulled into the hotel.

We were just going to go to the restaurant in the hotel for dinner and call it a night. We had another day ahead of us to enjoy before New Years Eve, and I was so excited. It was going to be perfect. Ali and I were here in New York City, what could have been any better?