The Richardson List

If Carter was to be sure of one thing, it was could say one hell of a pep talk and her smiles were infectious. She was evidence of this. Because while there were many things that threatened to lower Carter’s spirits, because of Audrey’s doings, she remained perfectly content.

On that morning she had endured her regular routine, it had been the exact same order she had done things time and time again, however she felt as if something were oddly different about that particular day. She wasn’t able to pin-point the peculiar feeling, or even why she thought that, however was certain that something was going to be changed. And in honour of this, instead of her standard Rice Krispies with three spoons of sugar, she had Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

As well as a switch up in her breakfast, she also got a ride from Audrey’s aunt that morning instead of taking the bus. The blonde didn’t want Carter venturing off to school on her lonesome, especially if Cole decided to tag along as well considering Lily wasn’t exactly a method of transportation anymore. Because of this, Audrey made the sacrifice of waking up earlier than usual to drive her friend to school, something that went appreciated by said friend.

When they had arrived at the school they each parted ways to get to their own lockers and books, meeting up afterwards in the hallway in front of the library. They both agreed that it was an equal walk for each girl and was closest to their first period class.

This also meant that she was relieved the tension of passing Cole’s locker, something that allowed her to bathe in relaxation. Even if she wanted nothing more than for him to hear her out, she knew that he wouldn’t, and she’d much rather not become victim to his harsh stare.

“Are you ready for the best part of the whole day?” Audrey asked with a grin on her face, her arm falling upon Carter’s shoulders.

“Meh,” she mauled over the thought for a moment. “I think I’d rather skip Math and sitting next to Skye.”

In response Audrey retracted her arm back, spreading her palm across her heart with a gasp off her lips.

“Did you just say you didn’t want to do the most fun thing in the world: math?” she asked, her voice laced with the urgency usually stowed for dire life and death situations.

“I think I just did.” Carter laughed, the shrill bell ringing through her mind and signifying the beginning of five minutes for her to get to class.

“Hey Carter, did you bring the picture?” Audrey asked as she ambled down the hall, blending in with the rest of the students.

“Yeah,” she answered, tightening the grip on the strap of her backpack.

“Then today’s the day, I guess.”



“This is it.” Carter breathed out in an attempt to release all the anxiety pent up in her stomach, hoping that it would drift from her parted lips into the surrounding air. It didn’t as she continued wringing her hands in nervous habit and her stomach flipping in protest.

Beside her Audrey nodded her head, her clam expression also cracking slightly at the thought of what they were about to do.

“Well, I’ll be waiting. Best of luck to you.”

Audrey felt a small nudge in her back as she took a few steps forward from the push, eyebrows knitting together as she glanced over her shoulder at the grinning girl.

“What?”

She looked confused as she shot a look at Carter, looking for an explanation. Carter felt as if it was all very obvious.

“I’ll be right behind you; you know I’ve got faith that you can do it!” she reassured her friend with a fist pump, nodding her head with wide, innocent eyes. Such a good friend she was, giving all this support.

In reply, laughter spilled from Audrey’s lips. It was now Carter’s turn for confusion. Normally if a person was going to face the infamous Skye Richardson and tries to convince him to destroy his list, laughing was most likely the last thing to do as a prepping.

“Oh,” Audrey wiped an invisible tear from her cheek, a smile continuously adorning her mouth. “It’s funny ‘cause you think that I’m going to talk to Skye.”

Pausing momentarily, Carter eyed her friend suspiciously. “But… you are.”

The edges of Audrey’s lips quirked upward in amusement as she shook her head, placing a hand on each of the girl’s shoulders.

“Oh no, no, no, of course not.” She grinned devilishly. “You, my friend, are going to go up there and talk to him. This isn’t my battle to fight, it’s yours.”

As a response to her words, Carter stood, blinking repeatedly and wishing she hadn’t heard those words. She hoped that if she closed her eyes just enough times her friend would erupt into laughter, a “just kidding” following.

No “just kidding” ever followed.

“Audrey,” she began, “I don’t believe you’ve assessed the predicament correctly.”

The blonde’s face remained unfazed by the words, apparently she really hadn’t.

“You are much bigger than I, in both courage and in height. You are the stronger one, the better one, while I am but a mere parasite that sucks on your victory. I live vicariously through you,” Carter explained, bending her knees slightly and looking up at her friend, hands raised slightly in the air to add emphasis.

She thought she sounded rather convincing, and it was said that flattery could get one anywhere.

“What were you even planning to do?” Audrey asked with her hands poised on her hips and a disapproving glint in her eyes. Audrey was not amused anymore.

“Well, you know, I’d pretty much stand a few feet behind you. Repeat the last five words you say and snap my fingers in a Z-formation, you know, the usual back-up crew routine.” A shrug of the shoulders did not go well with the blonde who narrowed her eyes at Carter’s attitude.

Apparently this wasn’t going to go down as she had planned.

Carter inhaled with her teeth pressing against each other, lips curling away as her eyes narrowed in fear. “I have a feeling that you’re not amused.”

Audrey rolled her eyes while giving a sigh, proving Carter’s conclusions correct, unfortunately.

“No, you are going to go talk to Skye. It’s your battle to fight, not mine.”

Carter recoiled in response to her words. There were so many things wrong with that statement.

She knew better than to argue, simply because she knew that it would result in her defeat and in the end she was probably going to have to face Skye one way or another. And sooner or later was not a luxury she was entitled to, though she’d much rather chose later. Or never, for that matter.

“Okay,” she surrendered and trudged over to where Skye stood with his friends, focusing on the oxygen flowing in and out of her lungs.

One longing glance behind her back to where Audrey stood defiant, arms crossed over her chest, and she huffed. It didn’t have to be her battle; it could be anyone’s battle. It should’ve been anyone else’s battle.

Nonetheless, she took a deep breath and tapped on Skye’s shoulder, a familiar trembling crawling up her arms.

He turned, surprise written across his face once he recognized who it was. A cocked eyebrow seemed to ask the reason behind her presence.

“Can I talk to you for a moment?” she struggled to keep her voice steady, averting her gaze onto the ground.

“Sure.” He nodded at his friends before walking off, leaving Carter to follow him.

She did just that, attempting to tame the doubts roaring inside. Her options at the moment were to either go through with what they had planned, or to make a break for it. She once again found herself in fight or flight, and while usually she found herself running from anything close to confrontation, she stayed. And for once, on her own accord, she decided to keep walking.

“What is it?”

He turned to her, trying to meet her gaze but failing as it remained in her shoes. The curiosity was easy to pick from his voice, and Carter could ask herself to same question.

“Well, I was wondering if you could… you know… the whole list thing,” she stumbled over her words, searching through her vocabulary for the right ones to say, for anything to say that sounded at least a tad convincing.

“You want me to raise your score?” A

A smirk curved onto his lips as he lifted her chin with two of his fingers, forcing her to meet his pleased gaze. She could remember the first time she saw the emerald eyes, the times were she found herself lost in them, however now she felt nothing.

“You know, I never wanted to rate you so low,” he told her, what seemed to be honesty spilling from his lips. “It was Lily, she wanted me to rate you low so that that Cole guy wouldn’t want to hang out with you anymore. Pretty tricky, right? But I don’t care about her anymore, seriously. I really like you Carter.”

Carter found herself rendered speechles, lips slightly severing from disbelief. She found it so easy to drown in his words. Here was this guy, a guy who was pretty good-looking and was really charming and showering her with attention and could have any girl he’d like, confessing to her. Not anyone else, to Carter.

But she couldn’t return it because she knew she never liked him. Simply the idea of being with him was what captivated her, but she knew what it was like to have a crush, to like a boy, and it was never it.

Shaking her head, Carter squeezed her eyes tight while trying to rid herself from the weak sensation in her knees.

“No, that isn’t it.”

“What?” he asked, bewilderment clear in his tone.

“I want you to get rid of the list, please.”

He processed her request, the emerald eyes he possessed now reflecting scepticism as he chuckled lightly.

“You want me to get rid of the list?”

She nodded her head and another chuckle, this one a tad more defined. “That’s great Carter.”

She swallowed audibly and fished into her pocket, fingers grasping the secret weapon that was the picture of Skye. Carter could only hope that it worked as Audrey said it would, though she wondered if he would coil and bend over a simple embarrassing picture. Everyone had a few of those in their closets.

“I’ll show everyone this picture.” Her voice only had a slight threatening edge; however she was rather pleased on how it came out. She felt as if she had at least a bit more power over him, and that was enough for her.

Carter showed him the photograph she had gotten at Parker’s house- braces, greasy hair and all. She felt herself swell a little in pride once she saw his face, eyes wide and mouth slightly ajar.

“Where’d you get that?” he asked once he found his voice again.

Normally when a person found the upper hand they used it to their advantage. Their comebacks may become snappy or their words may drip with venom. Carter didn’t go through any of that though; dragging it out and watching him squirm. All she wanted was to just get through it as fast as possible.

Carter shrugged. “Your dad likes to hand ‘em out. Did you know your dad is gay? Why are you calling people faggots then?”

Her questions were sincere, only sheer curiosity forming her lips around them. Getting in the mind of Skye Richardson had always been something she wanted to do, even if it was next to impossible.

Now it was him who found an undeniable interest in the asphalt, teeth piercing into his bottom lip.

“You wouldn’t understand.”

Again, she shrugged. Prying was something unnecessary; she felt no need to waste her time.

“So, could you?” she pressed on.

Another chuckle was heard; however he nodded his head with a grin on his lips. “I guess it wouldn’t be that much of a problem, and you don’t leave me much choice. But only if you answer me this, why don’t you like me?”

She was surprised that it would be so easy; instead she always imagined a giant ultimatum, maybe a few ninja moves thrown in. At least more of a fight than this, but it seemed that deep down he was simply just another insecure teenager that they all were.

They built him up so high, on a pedestal he stood. But in the end he was just another boy, just another confused soul that was trying to find out where he fit in. And this was a surprisingly comforting thought, that she could relate to the infamous Skye Richardson.

Carter would normally assume that this question would be easy, however she found herself having difficulty answering. He waited as she mauled over her thoughts, attempting to find the answer herself.

Of course it was always there, but she was having a hard time admitting it. She wondered if she could ever say the words out loud, but the answer finally came.

And surprisingly, she didn’t feel weak. She didn’t feel as if she would crumble at any second, she didn’t want to avoid it anymore.

“Because you aren’t Cole.”