Resurrection

After my little scene of misunderstanding we continued talking about our favorite places, movies, music… We sat like that for I don’t know how long; just staring into each other and talking. We found out that we have lots in common which made me feel warm inside. We have very similar taste in music and even high fived each other agreeing that Ozzy Osbourne owns all that is best in music. We also very seriously agreed that Johnny Depp is the sexiest man to walk the Earth and that his talent is highly underrated. I had something to add to that but decided to keep it to myself thinking it wouldn’t be appropriate as it was my thoughts about Ville and comparing him to Johnny.
Ville was telling me about places in London. For someone who visited the place only few times a year and with limited time he knew the city quite well. He was so easy to be around and I laughed at myself for fearing to talk to him. I still felt shy but I was intrigued to know more about him. I loved when he talked, not only his voice, to which I knew by now I could listen for hours even if he was reading random words from a dictionary, but just the way he talked. Even simple words sounded beautiful coming from his mouth. One minute he could sound highly educated and the next he could be telling me some cheesy one liners that made me think if he was telling the truth or not. And the best part, he seemed genuinely interested in what I had to say. Most people get bored with me very quickly because I’d rather listen and answer than talk and question them or just sit not talk at all. Which what was Ville doing right now. He was asking more questions than I did, but I was fine with that. He didn’t go too deep, just random, silly questions. It felt like we were talking for hours, our cups of chocolate long empty.
For someone who just met me he was quite, moderately open. He talked about the tour, the band, how he misses his family and friends back at home. How he sometimes wishes to just disappear so no one could expect anything from him. He was such a simple man, with simple needs and wishes. Not some God-like creature that some people think him to be. Like for instance, this Sunday he’d wish to spend sleeping till late noon, then going to some old book shop and spend there few hours just randomly browsing and leaving with only one or two books, then go to some café that is as old as his tower and order some overpriced tea with some homemade pastry and just sit by the window and watch people go by, then late at night, get into bed and listen to some 50’s ballads until he falls asleep; yet on Sunday he’ll be playing a gig in Manchester and whole day will be spent with strangers, doing interviews and answering exactly the same questions as the day before and before that…..
I felt sad for him. He seemed happy with what he was doing but at the same time it was all he was doing. He couldn’t just drop everything and not do it. All his work, his life wasn’t about him. Some years ago he chose to dedicate his life to others, to please random strangers. And while it is rewarding in its own ways, he can’t never be free whenever he chose to be. All those people became his life….and you just don’t want to quit that…. At least most of the time…

“That is insane not to mention disgusting!”, I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard. Ville was telling me stories from the early days when the guys used to do quite nasty but hilarious pranks to each other. “I seriously cannot imagine you ever doing that!”
“What can I say, love, we had too much free time and way too much alcohol back then. I think we still have all that but nowadays it’s more verbal than physical”. I wiped my eyes from the few tears that escaped. Drunk Ville seemed to be a lot of fun to be around with and even though I never had the opportunity to be around with him then I honestly preferred this what we were doing now. Like a couple of old people remembering the good old times. There’s always plenty of time to make new memories and I knew that this was one of them.
“So, what do you do with your life?”, Ville asked me. For the last hour or so we were talking about his career and the band and now I guess it’s my turn. Wait till he hears how amazingly, life changing it is. Note the heavy sarcasm.
“I’m a photographer”, I nodded, “very exotic…. Probably one of the most common careers these days”.
“I think photography’s beautiful. Not anyone can get a really good shot.”
“Yeah they can. Have you heard of photoshop?”, I was getting pissed just thinking about that. Some random idiot picks up his camera phone or whatever, takes pictures of some raindrops on a window, goes to his photoshop adds some bits and bobs and vouola a grand masterpiece!! Those pictures are soulless just like their artists.
“I don’t think you use that”
“How do you know?”
“Well mainly from the way you said it.”, he looked at me intently, “You’re one of those old timers. You like classic. Those innocent moments that cannot be replicated or changed.”
I looked at him shocked. “And you got all that from what, the way I sit?”, I asked sarcastically.
“No”, he chuckled and scratched his head somewhat awkwardly, “You just seem that way to me. I can see for myself that you’re not one of those giggly messes that think plastic looks beautiful.
I was blushing. “Ville…I don’t want to be rude or anything but why are you here? I mean… why did you want to be here with me tonight?
“Why not?”, he asked, clearly not seeing the picture as I did.
“Well…. You don’t know me and nor do I you.”, I sighted, “I could be a crazy stalker for all you know”
“Really? You are? Are you gonna try and have your wicked way with me then?”, he said sounding as serious as he could though his eyes shined with amusement.
I managed to controlled a giggle that just wanted to burst out, “Ville, I’m serious. We met barely few hours ago and from what I heard you don’t hang out with fans, let alone buy them hot chocolates and chat about their lives! I could seriously be someone that just wants to use you, to get some dirty secret from you or get you into bed and make a sex tape and sell it to the public! Didn‘t you think about that?!”, I was getting frustrated and was most definitely ruining the mood but I just needed to know.
Ville sighted and leaned closer to me, looking deep into my eyes.
“Eva, what you just said shows to me that you’re not going to do any of that. I’ve met thousands of people during the years. Some were very sweet and supportive, while others were as crazy as they come. It honestly doesn’t matter if you know the person or not, if he or she is a fan or never heard of you. Sometimes you just connect with people in ways I do not understand. They just emanate this thing about them that draws you to them. It’s like a sixth sense or whatever. You just feel they’re right for you. I have to admit, I was mistaken few times in my life, but only very few times and that makes me a very good judge of character. And tonight, you called out to me.”, He was looking at me with sparkle in his emerald eyes. Pure honesty reflected back at meas I looked into his eyes. “I… called out to you..?”, I stammered a little, still taken aback by his words.
“As I said, some people just call out to us. I know it’s one of the worst clichés but you looked different.”, he shrugged and I could swear I saw just a tiny hint of blush on his cheeks, but it must be just my imagination.
“Different as in…..?”
He shrugged again, “Don’t know really, just different. You didn’t freak out when you saw me so I guess that’s a big bonus”. Yes I did, just not in the way you’d see or know….
“Well, if I’m honest here, I did kinda…in my head. But it was more because of the whole excitement and from all the screaming people around me.” …..and because of you…. I blushed at my own thoughts. I looked up at Ville and he was smiling the sweetest smile at me.
“You look beautiful when you blush like that…. Ummmm… I mean… not that you don’t look beautiful when you’re not blushing…”, Ville blinked a few times and started chewing on his lip. Cute. He seem to embarrass be a little bit embarrassed.
“Oh Ville, you being all adorable like don’t won’t make me blush any less”, I laughed. Hmmmm I could’ve gone without saying that…..
“This is ridiculous cause we’re like…..”, he laughed.
“I know….”, I sighted. My heart was beating way too fast for my liking. My eyes drifted to the clock on the far wall and it was showing 2:35am.
“Oh my God! We’ve been here nearly three hours!!”, I said to Ville and looked outside. The street looked completely deserted. I didn’t like going home alone at night but I really didn’t like going home alone at night when there was no one outside apart from me. For some reason it felt more scary than passing groups of drunks and homeless people. At least the rain stopped.
“With a good company time always flies fast. I guess we should go. I kept you here long enough.”, Ville said and gathered his things from the table and put his beanie back on.
“Mhmm”, I took my bag and stood up. I really didn’t want to leave this place. I wanted to talk to Ville more. To know more about him. To listen to him. Just be with him. This night was amazing and I wish it never ended. I met a wonderful person and sadly I had to let him go. I couldn’t ask him to stay a little bit more. He needed to get back to his hotel and rest for tomorrows show. He gave me more of his attention than I deserved in the first place yet I wanted for more. I really wasn’t expecting him to want to do this again tomorrow or some other day. He needed something different for one night and I was it. The thought of it just made me sad even more. He held the doors for me and we went into the crispy night. His hotel was in the same direction as mine so I had at least a little bit more time with him. Unless he wanted to take a taxi…..
“Where are you staying?”, he asked.
“Bloomsbury”, I zipped my jacket, it was quite cold coming from inside a warm café.
“That’s just few streets away from my hotel”. Ville smiled and his eyes seemed happier, relieved. “Mind if we walk or would you like to take a taxi?”
“Walk. I could use some fresh air”…. and a few more minutes with you…. I sighted. What is wrong with me? I usually don’t have such silly emotions. I checked my phone for missed calls. There were none, just a text from Ali ‘Where r u? R u with V?? Call me!! xx’ I received it over an hour ago. I decided not to call. I’ll be back soon anyways.
“So, you’re coming to tomorrows show, right?”. He knew I was coming, I told him that we’re going to all UK dates. Yet he looked expectantly at me, waiting for me to confirm that again.
“Yes.“, Ville nodded and looked ahead with smile playing on his face. He was happy by my answer. I looked at my feet and smiled back. “By Ali’s calculations we should be sleeping right now so we could be up bright and early and go camping by the door. She’s insane, she does that every single time. I really don’t want to do that tomorrow, especially if it’s gonna rain again.”
“Actually I was thinking if you would like to come backstage again, before and after the show.” I looked at Ville like he just called my mother a whore.
“Y-you want us to come again?”. My expression must’ve looked comical to him because the moment he looked at me he started laughing. I pouted and gently punched him.
“I would like that a lot. That is , if you want to see me again but if not it‘s ok, you know, I just thought…”, he chuckled a few more times and looked at me seriously.
My heart and brain were doing He wanted to see me again. I interrupted him quickly.
“Of course I would!”
“You don’t have…”
“Ville, I’d love to see you and the guys again”, I said softly . It was cute to see him somewhat nervous.
“Good”, Ville smiled satisfied. “Just come to the back door tomorrow and they’ll give you the passes.”
“I’m gonna be a VIP huh?”
“Most definitely. You and your friend will be our honorable guests!”
I shook my head, “Ali’s gonna flip out! You really don’t know what it’ll mean to her”. Ville glanced at me and winked.
All too soon we approached my hotel.
“This is me”
“Thank you for tonight”, he said. I was taken aback. I should be the one thanking him not the other way round…. “I really had a lovely night”.
“Me too and thanks for buying me the best cup of chocolate I’ve ever had”.
“Then we both win”
“Yeah” A few moments of silence passed between the two of us. It seemed that none of us wanted to be the first one to say good night.
“Ok then, I think I should let you go and use whatever is left of the night”
I smiled at him, not really knowing what to say. Goodbye being the last words I wanted to say.
“Doubtful I’ll be able to get any sleep. I will have to keep Ali from climbing walls after I tell her about tomorrow…or...later today”.
I looked behind me, some very drunk couple entered the hotel. Each holding one another and hysterically laughing at something. At that moment Ville took my hand and gently kissed it. I looked at his slightly pouting, red and just so perfect lips. They seemed to scorch my skin and I quietly gasped. He looked at me, small light shining in his eyes. “Good night, Eva”, when he spoke, his lips brushed my hand and it felt like another kiss. My hand started tingling and I could feel my face heating up. He pulled away and lowered my hand, smiling gently.
“Good night, Ville”, I said quietly. I couldn’t stop myself from smiling even if I had wanted to.
“I’ll see you later today”, he said and started walking backwards. I nodded watching him turn around and walk away, just few second later he rounded the corner and disappeared. I could swear I saw his head turn to me and smirk. I took a deep breath and entered the lobby. I had my key card so I went straight for the elevator. An old looking receptionist eyed me wearily thinking Lord knows what. Before she asked me something I casually took out my key card, pretending I didn’t see her staring at me. The doors opened and I entered, pressing my floor. I looked at my reflection in the mirrored wall. I snorted at myself ,“Good one Eva”.
Before I could put the key card to unlock the door it swung open and Ali was all over me.
“Oh my God! Where have you been?? I was so worried!!!”, Ali was checking me if I was ok, like I was stabbed or something.
“I’m fine, I’m ok!”, I grabbed her hands and steadied her.
“Where have you been? Why didn’t you call? I thought you got lost or something!”
“Why didn’t you call?”
“I couldn’t, my phone was almost dead so I waited for your text”
“I’m sorry, I only saw your message like minutes ago.”, I looked at her apologetically. We always looked out for each other ever since we were little and I really didn’t want to scare her I just honestly forgot all about her. I know it sounds terrible but….
“I was with Ville”, I said removing my clothes and going to the bathroom.
“With…. You weren’t at the pub…”, Ali looked really confused. I only gave her the look and started brushing my teeth, leaving her to figure it out for herself. Honestly, she was teasing my all evening after the show and now she can’t connect the dots herself. Suddenly her eyes got wide and she opened her mouth in shock. Finally!
“You mean you went out with Ville! Alone??”
“Uhuh”
“Where?!”
I spat my tooth paste out and rinsed my mouth. “Just for a hot chocolate. We have to go there you and I. I swear, it was the best thing I’ve ever tasted…”. Ali shook her head vigorously and help up her hands in front of me.
“Whoa whoa! Do not change the theme! What do you mean you and Ville went out for a chocolate? I thought you were all… squeamish about him”, she motioned with her fingers in front of my face. I pushed her hands away and went back into the room. I really don’t know if I’ll be able to fall asleep tonight.
“I wasn’t squeamish. I was…I don’t know. I guess I wasn’t really comfortable around him. But he didn’t want to go to the party and nor did I so he suggested we go to this café which is actually a gas station and I said yes. We started talking and…. He is very sweet and so simple. We chatted for nearly 3 hours.” Ali looked at me like I was some kind of deformed creature. I finished changing into my night clothes and got into bed.
“Wow…. You chatted with Ville Valo….. And I missed it!!!”, Ali flopped down on the bed.
“Oh yeah, like you weren’t hanging out with the rest of the band”, I rolled my eyes. “I honestly thought you’d be drunk”.
“Nah, I only had a few shots, I wanted to remember this night it being one in a lifetime opportunity and all…”, Ali sighted dramatically and looked at me with eyes as big as dinner plates and massive pout on her face. “I’m gonna miss them”, she sniffed. “They were so fun! And me and Burton really hit it on”.
“Really?”, I raised my eyebrow at her.
“Not in that way!”, she showed me not too gently. “I know he has a family. He is just so…interesting. Like, he knows so much about stuff than no other random guy would even bother knowing. Like did you know, he’s really into whole home stuff?”, I shook my head, amused by Ali’s fascination. “Like he’s really into this country style and he knows how to weave and make things by hand. He is so domesticated. I so need a man like him.”
“You really do, though not every guy will want to clean your crap like I do.”, I switched the bedside lights of and got comfy between the sheets.
“Ahhh shut up! You love it!”. We turned to each other and I could see in Ali’s eyes that she was dying to know more about my night with Ville. And honestly, I’m not sure I wanted to tell anyone, I wanted to keep it all to myself. If I start talking I would just start dreaming of things that might but never will happen and will only make myself sad. I sighted and motioned with my head to Ali to ask away.
“So… what did you talk about?”
“Just stuff. He was telling me about the band…. About what he likes… Where he lives… Then he asked questions about me but it was mostly random stuff.”, I looked at Ali and we smiled at each other. “He is really sweet”.
“You like him”, Ali stated bluntly.
“I do. He is really something”, I gave Ali a stern look telling her not to say anything else. I closed my eyes again and felt sleep consuming me. I guess the whole excitement and nervousness took it’s toll on me after all. I felt Ali roll over and grunt “Ugh! It’s 4am! We need to be up in 4 and a half hours!”
I smiled remembering that we won’t need to wake up early, nor stand in the line. I still couldn’t believe that Ville wanted to see us again. Maybe he’ll even want to have another hot chocolate with me today. I could feel my hand tingling again and pressed it to my lips. I could not wait to see what tomorrow brings, even though I still felt shy around Ville I wanted to be in his company again. To see those amazing emeralds shinning and to hear that geeky laugh.
“You don’t have to set the alarm, Ville gave us backstage passes”. I grinned when Ali started choking probably on her own spit. Good thing we have all day tomorrow to sleep because I’ll be bitched at for not telling this information as soon as I stepped into the room all night long….