Status: Finished! :)

AbSYNthe

Paper Cuts

I stood there looking down at my beautiful girlfriend. She laid there in a black coffin with her eyes closed. It looked as if she was sleeping, only that wasn't the case. She didn't breath anymore...or sleep. She couldn't even see. It was a beautiful day outside, it was one that Angel would have loved. It wasn't too hot and it wasn't too cold. A slight breeze blew past me and I wanted to enjoy it, I almost did... But I didn't, and I couldn't. Not without Angel. Flowers surrounded us. Flowers of all different colors, but the ones I bought were white. They seemed pure, and beautiful, like I had always imagined her. If I ever bought flowers for Adrienne, they would be black.

Two days ago they called me from Anacapa and told me that my sweet girlfriend took her own life. No, it wasn't Adrienne, like you'd think. It was Angel. All of the guilt finally caught up with her. And it's all my fault. How could I do this to her? How could I fail her like this? Her father would be disappointed in me. But in all honestly, this might have been avoided if he had told her the truth. If I had told her the truth. We could have been in this thing together. Maybe she wouldn't be dead.

Everyone looked at me as if they expected me to break down in tears any moment now, but the tears weren't coming. I had cried all night and I couldn't sleep because even if I dosed off for a second I dreamed of her. I look like shit today as well...which I know was already expected of me. I am wearing my aviator sunglasses so that no one can see the dark circles...And so that if the tears do come, no one can see. Jimmy stood beside me patting my back as the preacher spoke a few words from the bible...that I don't happen to believe in. Angel did, though and I know that she would appreciate all of this. I hope she's in heaven right now looking down at us. I also hope that Adrienne is somewhere burning in hell. I believe with all my heart that Adrienne was an evil soul stuck in Angel's body. Because I've seen other people with split personalities and they were never that evil.

"Now, Brian Haner would like to say a few words..." The preacher announced, pulling me out of my deep thoughts. I walked slowly towards the podium, still not knowing what to say. I don't honestly think that there is anything that I could say to sum up Angel's life in one speech. Once I got up there, I took my sunglasses off, hating for everyone to see how bad I looked. I almost expected a gasp, but I guess they didn't expect anything less. I cleared my throat before I began to speak.

"Angel was a beautiful person. The love of my life...She was everything to me... And I guess you all know that...But what you didn't know is...Angel had a medical condition called Dissociative identity disorder...D.I.D. And I guess I should have told you all a lot sooner. She never knew until a few days before she died... There are a lot of things that I wish I could change about this situation. I just wanted you all to know...and I think she would have wanted you all to know. I just want you all to remember as she was, the good and not the bad..." My mind went blank as I searched for more words to say... but I didn't think there was anything else I could say. I couldn't bare to look anyone in the face, as I didn't want to see anyone cry. Instead, I look past them, through the woods. But I saw something different. Something I shouldn't have seen. A woman, in a tree, she was hanging by a rope around her neck... She was swinging. I squinted my eyes and moved a little closer without saying anything. I gasped when I realized that it wasn't just a woman, it was Angel. She stared back at me with a cold, blank stare...and smiled.
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I know it has been foREVer since we have updated (and it is def my fault!!) but here is the last chapter. Hope you like!

xx
amimarievee & up in smoke;

& here is the song that inspired this story
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2p43j2bw7s