Capture My Heart

Violet.

Falling in love with Jacob Black was not on the agenda.

I mean, I’m sure I wasn’t in love with him as of yet, but I was close enough. So close, I couldn’t even stay away from him when I saw him at that damn cliff again.

He wasn’t going to jump, I knew, but he looked so deep in thought in my vision…and so conflicted. Just how I was starting to feel. He had wanted to see me, and oblivious to him, I wanted to see him too.

I missed him when he wasn’t there, in a way I’d never felt for anyone but my sister and my parents, all of which were gone.

He just…as lame as it sounds, he was just really different. He was so vulnerable, and he wore it on his sleeve because he didn’t care. He always seems like he’s putting up an act for people other than me, like when we at my…our…springs and his friends showed up.
He seemed like he really wanted them to leave and it gave a warm fluttery feeling in my stomach I couldn’t name. It made me think he actually liked seeing me. Like he didn’t just think I was a burden the way he must’ve thought I was when we first met.

That boy, he had no idea what being with him was doing to me. He can act all nervous around me sometimes but he has no idea how much that it actually affects me.

I was apparently the only one who looked at him like a normal person, but he had no idea how much affection was actually behind my eyes. He had no idea how badly I wanted him.
He keeps staring at me, like he thinks the same, but whenever I talk to him about it I end up hissing at him, making it sound like I was annoyed when I was really just so frustrated and curious as to whether or not being with me was having an effect on him besides his nerves. I mean, for all I know that could just be my mind playing tricks on me. Maybe he just gets jumpy because I’m the only girl he’s probably talked to since he got depressed.

It was a dangerous relationship, and I knew I was in way too deep for it to be healthy. I had to see him today, it was unavoidable.

I tried to clear my head while heading in the direction Jacob would be.
You’re pathetic, my conscience hissed at me. You’re only going to get him killed interacting like this.

Him and you both, have you forgotten that everyone you love dies? Why do you think Edward gave up on you?

I sighed to myself, knowing the words were true and still unable to make myself turn around. Jacob was my drug, and I was addicted in a lethal way. He had broken through so many of my walls. Too many. I don’t know if I could black him back again, and I didn’t want to.

Reaching the cliff I started teasing him, making his eyes light up and a big smile take over his face. My heart thumped unevenly at the sight, but I was sure he hadn’t heard.

“You came,” he breathed, and I shrugged weakly. “Yeah,” I stated in a sigh. He was smiling, lighting my whole world on fire and I had to fight back the blush creeping over my face.

I moved past him, sitting in the same place and position he just was and patting the space beside me while he followed. The wind blew harshly against the cliff as soon as he was beside me, and I leaned into him while he watched me and I stared at the waves. His hands played with my hair, and I felt my words become lost to me.

“Happy birthday,” I said finally, causing him to smile when I looked up to see him. He continued to smile before his lips brushed against my nose. I rolled my eyes at him, to hide my anxious heart and eager lips.

He was silent, watching me while I mentally begged for him to kiss me, and also tried to persuade myself not to want him to. It was a very conflicting thing.

Out of the corner of my eye, I stared at him, and he turned, his mouth opening to speak before his jaw fell slack. He just stared, his eyes shining and a smile tugging at the edge of his lips while I watched in confusion. What was he doing?

I turned to speak, but before I could get a word in, his lips smothered mine and my thoughts went blank. I blinked in surprise and didn’t even think about it. My body turned towards him and my hands found their way to his hair, running through his thick black locks and causing him to shiver ever so slightly.

His hands rested on my waist, and he kissed me tenderly. His lips were soft against mine, and tasted like icing. My mind wandered, detaching from my body and leaving my head a jumbled mess as he continued to kiss me.

His tongue ran against my lips, soft as butterflies wings, before retreating, like he’d just lost a bit of confidence after going through with it and he didn’t want me to notice.

I opened my mouth slightly to let him know that it was okay and he shyly let his tongue glide in. Our tongues danced for a while and I was in his lap, with my arms tightly wrapped around his neck, refusing to let him go. I wanted him so badly.

I was so distracted, I didn’t even feel them creeping up on us until they started shouting for Jacob. Jerking back, my eyes grew wide as I realized what I was doing.

Jacob looked at me, in wonder and confusion as I struggled for words. “I have to go,” I whispered, my voice quiet and hushed. He released me, although he seemed to be doing it grudgingly and he watched me as I edged backwards.

“Bye,” he whispered, with a dreamy look on his face.

I bit my lip and ran off into the woods, taking a separate route from the boys searching for Jacob, and falling into bed the second I got home.

My lips couldn’t help but form a smile, although I knew that what I just did would cost me.
I simply didn’t care at the moment; all I could think about was Jacob. His lips molded against mine, like they were made just for me and his body, although it didn’t seem that way being so big and muscular, fit perfectly against mine.

Seeing the look on his face after we pulled away was almost as good as the kiss itself. He looked at me with so much love, so much adoration, like he had found something he’d been looking for, for a long time.

Sighing, as the thoughts of doubt and pain started to once again creep into my mind, I turned on some mindless TV show before drifting into sleep.
.....

Something was very wrong.

That much was clear as the forest stood in silence. Nothing stirred, and no noise was heard, giving the emptiness a bit of an echo. Creatures had taken to hiding, indicating a threat was approaching.

I was standing to the side, not a part of the dream itself, but just watching my vision unfold.
Soft paws broke the silence, three or four pairs scouting ahead before more would come. Fur showed against the trees, large furry bodies with hidden faces and teeth that were bared, just itching for a fight.

The largest wolf turned, his head shifting as he tested the scents in the air, and his muscles tensing as he realized the area had already been occupied, and that perhaps a greater threat to his pack than the one they were seeking might lurk in this foreign place.
He let out a soft warning growl, thoughts traveling from wolf mind to wolf mind as the sliver of moon pressed down on his strength.

The head turned to me, not actually seeing me, since I was not really there.
My breath got caught in my throat as I met the creature’s bright eyes. Eyes I recognized. Eyes that had once leaned over me while I writhed in agony on the ground and attempted to run from a life that wasn’t welcome; an effort that was eventually wasted.

Barking forcefully, he ushered his pack to leave, that there would be no attack tonight, and they did as they were told, but I wasn’t comforted.

I had no doubt in my mind that they’d be back, and soon.

…..

A scream ripped its way out of my throat, bouncing off the empty room and echoing as my lungs burned. Hysteric sobs wracked my entire body as I recalled what I had just seen.
They were coming for me now…the wolves that I had tried too hard to outrun…spent countless years hiding from…They would kill me, and take out Jacob too unless I could help it.

Throwing myself out of bed, I wished that I had never come here.

Because now, with the enemy closing in so soon and my time left with him ticking away at a taunting speed, I’d rather have killed my family with my own hands than watch Jacob die for me.

The phone was a century away, and I ripped it off the wall while desperately dialing the number I was only allowed calling if signaling the end.

It rang twice before he answered.

“Edward, I need your help,” I whispered, my voice breaking. He would know what to do; he always had so much faith in me than I did myself. I just hoped whatever he thought up would be enough, because I couldn’t stand anymore loss.

And at that second, I let the remainder of my walls crumble, and admitted to myself what I’ve been blocking away for so long. No point in hiding it.

I love you, Jacob Black.