One of the Boys

I walked into school that Monday feeling weird, somewhat angry and just overall bad. Sunglasses, sweats and hair in a bun. "You look awful," De said, "are you hungover or something?"

"No," I replied with snark, "I'm just a fucking mess, I don't know what's wrong with me. "

She eyed me suspiciously as I glared at her. "They are called feelings bitch," she smirked, "and I think you are starting to have them." I took my glasses off so she could more clearly see my eyebrow raise, but she ignored it. "I've been waiting for this day for like our entire life," she looked at me practically singing every word, "when love finds you."

"Oh please," I made a vomiting motion, "the cheese, it's killing me."

She gave me a disappointed look, "is it so hard for you to be honest with yourself?" I looked at her blankly and then she put the pieces together herself. "How can you," she sighed, "you're not real honest with other people."

I shrugged, "I can be honest, I choose not to." I banged my head against my locker because it was being a bitch and not opening, "I could seriously shoot someone right now."

"Someone's in a bad mood," I heard the voice heading my way.

"You," I pointed not looking up, "you are dead to me, Tyler McKluskie."

"What," he said confused, "what did I do, I approached with caution." I was going to answer but he continued, "and McKluskie isn't my last name Rae."

I looked up, "I like it better, and the problem is you opened your annoying mouth."

"What's wrong with her," he whispered to De.

She smiled, "she's in love."

"I am not in love," I yelled causing most of the hallway to send their eyes my way. I looked at some girl passing and glared, "it's none of your business, honey." And with an intimidating step toward her she turned her head to the floor and sped up her pace. "Couldn't you at least come up with a more believable reason," I said through my teeth, "like fucking pms."

I slammed my locker shut and started walking to class where all day I promptly put my head on my desk and slept. After school I made my way to the gym where one of the guys decided to say, "you look like hell, Tanner."

I didn't care the truth value of the situation. "You should see your mom," I muscled up a smirk, "after I did her last night." I retreated into the girls locker room where I had not one teammate to chat to. Just cheerleaders, volleyball players and cross country girls. And that is when Brittany Evans walked up to me, "I could do without the insult today, barbie." I brushed past her and over to my locker.

"I wasn't going to insult you," she smiled, "I was going to congratulate you." I turned to her completely and utterly lost. "You know," she smiled, "on coming out of the lesbian closet." She nodded at my outfit.

I put my hand over my heart, "oh I am so sorry, you are not my type honey, I only date hot girls." I nodded at her outfit before I walked outside. And onto the field to get practice over with. I was feeling the overwhelming need to run away. I loved football, I loved practice, but today I was a big disgusting ball of hate and I didn't know what to do about it. After practice I threw off my stuff and started toward my car immediately.

I opened it only to have it closed. "What's eating you, Tanner," I looked up at Chris. Why of all people.

"Nothing, Mills," I rolled my eyes getting in the car.

"Some of the guys are going to hang," he said, "are you in."

"Are you going to be there," I raised my eyebrow not really knowing why I was triggering my anger at him. He nodded his head slowly and hesitantly. "Then no," I sat down.

He hit the top of my car to stop me, "did I do something wrong."

"What," I laughed looking out my window, "Mills, don't flatter yourself you have no effect on me, I've just decided to trigger all my anger towards you." He looked at me, "it doesn't need to make sense, I'm a girl." I could tell the boy was lost, "you know what, screw it, I'll come hang. Where are we going."

He looked at me, "just follow me, wouldn't want you getting lost."

I rolled my eyes and rolled up my window and did what I was told. I parked in the spot next to Mills at the local mall and slammed my door, "I know where the mall is, Mills." I looked around and started moving forward, "so where we going, Pizza Hut, Chipotle or is it food court." I turned around when he didn't answer, "please tell me we aren't going to the arcade, I don't want to have to kick your asses again."

"We can do whatever you want," he said.

I looked back, "I doubt the rest of the guys would like that."

I turned back and my expression changed when I saw his unsure look. "The guys aren't coming," he said.

"What," I looked at him.

"Well you've been upset all day so I thought you could use a pick me up," he shrugged, so what do you want to do?"

I raised my eyebrow and smiled, "if there is one thing I picked up from my mom, it's that shopping is very therapeutic." He looked at me unsure and I smirked, "you're the one who dragged me out here and now I'm going to make you suffer." And that I did, we walked into the food court and I had at least six bags of clothes. I decided it was time for ice cream and so the Baskin Robbins in the mall was perfect. "You were right," I sat down in one of the seats, "I needed this." I licked the ice cream off the cone.

"No need to thank me," he smiled taking a bite of his.

"Good," I said, "because I wasn't going to." His glance was somewhere else and I looked over, "what are you looking at."

He pointed, "that guy."

I observed, "I guess he's kinda cute in a Skipper sort a way," I sat back and looked at him, "but honestly I didn't peg him as your type, Mills." He looked at me and I just laughed, "stop being such a sourpuss, I'm just playing. So what, do you know him or something."

"No," he shook his head, "he just keeps looking over here."

I looked at the subject and then shrugged, "he's into one of us." I sat back, "my bets are on me, but I'm sure a very confused member of the gay community could find you appealing."

"Confused," he looked at me.

"Yeah," I nodded, "you're not gay." He looked at me unsure and I rolled my eyes, "you didn't like shopping with me and I've kissed a gay guy before, you can tell the difference." He rose his eyebrow and I smiled, "no we are not getting into specifics."

"Damn," he said, "I bet it's a good story."

"Not really," I shook my head and indulged in the ice cream. After starting on the cone itself I looked at him. "How did you know I was upset," I looked at him.

He rose an eyebrow at me, "Tanner, you've been acting like a bitch all day."

"Ha," I pointed at him victoriously, "I act like a bitch everyday." I looked at him, "admit it Christopher Mills you just wanted to get me alone." I leaned in and looked at him and leaned in, "because I'm just so irresistible."

He looked at me for a second and started to lean in, but stopped himself. I looked at him unsure and he put his hand to his head, "damnit Tanner."

"What did I do," I was half laughing, "I was joking around."

"Exactly," he said, "but you're right." I looked at him unsure and he continued, "I did make up an excuse to get you alone, because I like you." I looked at him for a second and then got up grabbed my bags and walked away. "Where are you going," he walked after me.

"I'm in the middle of fleeing an awkward situation," I said not looking back at him.

"You know I could have any girl I want," he said, "and for some reason I chose you." I stopped in my tracks at that statement.

I turned around, "why do you sound disappointed about that."

"Because you aren't the kind of girl a guy gets feelings for, Tanner," he said.

I was insulted to the very core. I bit my lip and swallowed my pride. I could make it real ugly, I could start a scene, but instead I just walked away. "Bang up job," I muttered under my breath, "I feel loads better."