‹ Prequel: The Joker and the Thief
Status: Don't worry. There's another one...
A Serious House on Serious Earth
Ambush
I decided to use the stairwell on the opposite of the building since Jonathan Crane still occupied the one I had come from. I left my drawing behind and rounded the corner, walking away from the medical center. The sound created by the heavy boots was deafening compared to that of my bare feet against the tiles. I stayed away from the walls and the ghoulish light.
I could see the stairwell door. I thought I was being observant and aware. I thought I was being smart. But maybe the crazy people had the upper hand on me because they have a different thought process. Maybe I couldn’t think like a crazy person because I wasn’t crazy. Or maybe I just sucked at being insane because it seemed like I was always caught off guard.
This time they came from behind. I didn’t hear them but that was probably due to my noisy boots. A body tackled me to the ground. Judging by their attacking style and their weight, I felt it was safe to assume it was man even before he flipped me over onto my back. I couldn’t make off any of his facial features in the darkness even though his face was only inches from mine. I was on the verge of questioning the murderousness of his behavior before he clasped his large hands around my throat and tighten his grip.
I tried to kick the man off, but his weight and knees against my thighs were too much. As my throat began to burn, I threw my arms up, in search of the man’s face. Either he was tall and my arms too short or I was searching in the wrong area because I was unable to come into contact with any vulnerable skin. The more I struggle the tighter his grip on my throat became. It came to point where I thought he was going to break my neck. The entire time he was strangling me, not a single word or sound emitted from his mouth. All I heard was his breathing and my lack of ability to.
Then I was blind. My vision turned to pure white for a second before black drops started to soak through. Off somewhere in the distance of my mind, I heard, ‘Loosen up, tight ass.” It was then followed by an all too familiar laugh only this one seemed to echo throughout my skull. Then a BANG filled my eardrums followed quickly by a painful rush of air to my lungs. I didn’t even notice the blood that splattered on my face until later. Along with the presence of oxygen and the face paint came the disappearance of the weight which had pinned me to the floor.
After the fit of coughs subsided, the first thing I noticed was the light. The macabre lighting had been replaced with the regular, bright lights. Only they weren’t stable. The light flickered at random intervals but I was still able to make out my savior. His short, green hair was combed neatly back and his face was covered in a new layer of paint. His suit was different from what I remembered. It was a darker shade of purple and was more form fitting than his previous ensemble. The only imperfection I was able to make out amongst the chaotic lights was a number of wrinkles which suggested that it had been carelessly folded and stored away.
The next thing I noticed was the gun which the Joker held casually in his right hand. We didn’t take our eyes off each other even as I instinctively raised a hand to my still burning throat. I knew there would be bruising. There always was. Then just when I thought it was safe to lift myself off the floor, the Joker began to laugh in his usual manner. I decided the floor was a safer place to be. After a moment, I risked a question. “What’s so funny?”
When he finally got his giggles under control, he managed to say, “The chokes on you.” His joke was followed quickly by another round of laughter. With what I was sure was a sour face, I pulled myself to my feet and headed for the stairs. I didn’t get very far before I was pulled into an awkward embrace. The Joker wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me against him so we were both facing the same direction. I exhaled rather loudly at the predictable turn of events. “Where do you think you’re going, darling?”
I was about to respond when another voice entered the conversation. “Let her go, Joker.” My mind reset to three years ago as the Batman stepped out of the shadows and into the still hectic lights. I was having deja vu. I was relieved to see the Batman but being a hostage again as the Joker and him traded words wasn’t in my plan. In response, the Joker tightened his grip around me and let out a small laugh. After a few more moment of flickering, the lights finally gave up and returned to their ghoulish state. But none of us moved. We stood in the eerie light and stared at each other. Finally, the Joker spoke.
“I see you received the free ticket we sent you. I'm glad. I did so want you to be here. It’s been too long, Batsy. No calls. No letters. You and Marie are awful at maintaining friendships.” I made a small attempt to remove the Joker’s arm but it didn’t result in much. Then I saw something move in the darkness behind the Batman. Multiple movements.
“I’ve been dying to ask you a question.” The Joker continued. “All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day.” My eyes were scanning the space behind the Batman until I was finally to make out what was moving in the shadows. I opened my mouth to warn him, but it was quickly covered by the Joker’s hand.
“You had a bad day once, am I right? I know I am. I can tell. You had a bad day and everything changed. Why else would you dress up as a flying rat? You had a bad day, and it drove you as crazy as everybody else... Only you won't admit it! You have to keep pretending that life makes sense, that there's some point to all this struggling!” The Joker took a step back. I could only make out five inmates in the hallway behind the Batman but I knew there was more. I began to wonder if I had been used as bait to lure the Batman to an apparent ambush. And the Joker continued to distract him.
“God, you make me want to puke. I mean, what is it with you? What made you what you are? Girlfriend killed by the mob, maybe? Brother carved up by some mugger? Something like that, I bet. Something like that... Something like that happened to me, you know. I... I'm not exactly sure what it was. Sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another... If I'm going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice! Ha ha ha!” As the Joker stepped back with me, the inmates moved closer to the still stationary Batman. I began to twist my head in circles, trying to evade the Joker’s hand longer enough to warn the Batman.
“But my point is... My point is I went crazy. When I saw what a black, awful joke the world was, I went crazy as a coot! I admit it! Why can't you? I mean, you're not unintelligent! You must see the reality of the situation. Do you know how many times we've come close to world war three over a flock of geese on a computer screen? Do you know what triggered the last world war? An argument over how many telegraph poles Germany owed its war debt creditors! Telegraph poles! Ha ha ha ha HA! It's all a joke! Everything anybody ever valued or struggled for... it's all a monstrous, demented gag! So why can't you see the funny side? Why aren't you laughing?” The Joker then digressed into a fit which echoed off the walls.
My anxiety level had peaked but the time I able to wriggle free enough to yell out two words. “Behind you!” Several things happened after that. The mob of inmates rushed forward as the Joker pulled me towards the stairs, leaving the Batman alone with the insane criminals. Only I was going to go with the Joker calmly. I elbowed to him rather roughly in the side before aiming higher and hitting in the face. I didn’t look behind me as I ran for the stairwell door. I never slowed my pace as I hurried up the stairs.
I could see the stairwell door. I thought I was being observant and aware. I thought I was being smart. But maybe the crazy people had the upper hand on me because they have a different thought process. Maybe I couldn’t think like a crazy person because I wasn’t crazy. Or maybe I just sucked at being insane because it seemed like I was always caught off guard.
This time they came from behind. I didn’t hear them but that was probably due to my noisy boots. A body tackled me to the ground. Judging by their attacking style and their weight, I felt it was safe to assume it was man even before he flipped me over onto my back. I couldn’t make off any of his facial features in the darkness even though his face was only inches from mine. I was on the verge of questioning the murderousness of his behavior before he clasped his large hands around my throat and tighten his grip.
I tried to kick the man off, but his weight and knees against my thighs were too much. As my throat began to burn, I threw my arms up, in search of the man’s face. Either he was tall and my arms too short or I was searching in the wrong area because I was unable to come into contact with any vulnerable skin. The more I struggle the tighter his grip on my throat became. It came to point where I thought he was going to break my neck. The entire time he was strangling me, not a single word or sound emitted from his mouth. All I heard was his breathing and my lack of ability to.
Then I was blind. My vision turned to pure white for a second before black drops started to soak through. Off somewhere in the distance of my mind, I heard, ‘Loosen up, tight ass.” It was then followed by an all too familiar laugh only this one seemed to echo throughout my skull. Then a BANG filled my eardrums followed quickly by a painful rush of air to my lungs. I didn’t even notice the blood that splattered on my face until later. Along with the presence of oxygen and the face paint came the disappearance of the weight which had pinned me to the floor.
After the fit of coughs subsided, the first thing I noticed was the light. The macabre lighting had been replaced with the regular, bright lights. Only they weren’t stable. The light flickered at random intervals but I was still able to make out my savior. His short, green hair was combed neatly back and his face was covered in a new layer of paint. His suit was different from what I remembered. It was a darker shade of purple and was more form fitting than his previous ensemble. The only imperfection I was able to make out amongst the chaotic lights was a number of wrinkles which suggested that it had been carelessly folded and stored away.
The next thing I noticed was the gun which the Joker held casually in his right hand. We didn’t take our eyes off each other even as I instinctively raised a hand to my still burning throat. I knew there would be bruising. There always was. Then just when I thought it was safe to lift myself off the floor, the Joker began to laugh in his usual manner. I decided the floor was a safer place to be. After a moment, I risked a question. “What’s so funny?”
When he finally got his giggles under control, he managed to say, “The chokes on you.” His joke was followed quickly by another round of laughter. With what I was sure was a sour face, I pulled myself to my feet and headed for the stairs. I didn’t get very far before I was pulled into an awkward embrace. The Joker wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me against him so we were both facing the same direction. I exhaled rather loudly at the predictable turn of events. “Where do you think you’re going, darling?”
I was about to respond when another voice entered the conversation. “Let her go, Joker.” My mind reset to three years ago as the Batman stepped out of the shadows and into the still hectic lights. I was having deja vu. I was relieved to see the Batman but being a hostage again as the Joker and him traded words wasn’t in my plan. In response, the Joker tightened his grip around me and let out a small laugh. After a few more moment of flickering, the lights finally gave up and returned to their ghoulish state. But none of us moved. We stood in the eerie light and stared at each other. Finally, the Joker spoke.
“I see you received the free ticket we sent you. I'm glad. I did so want you to be here. It’s been too long, Batsy. No calls. No letters. You and Marie are awful at maintaining friendships.” I made a small attempt to remove the Joker’s arm but it didn’t result in much. Then I saw something move in the darkness behind the Batman. Multiple movements.
“I’ve been dying to ask you a question.” The Joker continued. “All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day.” My eyes were scanning the space behind the Batman until I was finally to make out what was moving in the shadows. I opened my mouth to warn him, but it was quickly covered by the Joker’s hand.
“You had a bad day once, am I right? I know I am. I can tell. You had a bad day and everything changed. Why else would you dress up as a flying rat? You had a bad day, and it drove you as crazy as everybody else... Only you won't admit it! You have to keep pretending that life makes sense, that there's some point to all this struggling!” The Joker took a step back. I could only make out five inmates in the hallway behind the Batman but I knew there was more. I began to wonder if I had been used as bait to lure the Batman to an apparent ambush. And the Joker continued to distract him.
“God, you make me want to puke. I mean, what is it with you? What made you what you are? Girlfriend killed by the mob, maybe? Brother carved up by some mugger? Something like that, I bet. Something like that... Something like that happened to me, you know. I... I'm not exactly sure what it was. Sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another... If I'm going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice! Ha ha ha!” As the Joker stepped back with me, the inmates moved closer to the still stationary Batman. I began to twist my head in circles, trying to evade the Joker’s hand longer enough to warn the Batman.
“But my point is... My point is I went crazy. When I saw what a black, awful joke the world was, I went crazy as a coot! I admit it! Why can't you? I mean, you're not unintelligent! You must see the reality of the situation. Do you know how many times we've come close to world war three over a flock of geese on a computer screen? Do you know what triggered the last world war? An argument over how many telegraph poles Germany owed its war debt creditors! Telegraph poles! Ha ha ha ha HA! It's all a joke! Everything anybody ever valued or struggled for... it's all a monstrous, demented gag! So why can't you see the funny side? Why aren't you laughing?” The Joker then digressed into a fit which echoed off the walls.
My anxiety level had peaked but the time I able to wriggle free enough to yell out two words. “Behind you!” Several things happened after that. The mob of inmates rushed forward as the Joker pulled me towards the stairs, leaving the Batman alone with the insane criminals. Only I was going to go with the Joker calmly. I elbowed to him rather roughly in the side before aiming higher and hitting in the face. I didn’t look behind me as I ran for the stairwell door. I never slowed my pace as I hurried up the stairs.