Forget It All

I had come to the conclusion there was no reason to be afraid. Garrett was a friend of mine before he was my boyfriend. Couldn't we just pick up from there?

I hung out with Kennedy, Pat, Jared and John before I had to go do my actual job. We spent a lot of time catching up. The guys informed me about what had happened the past year through the band and how they were getting more popular and popular.

I told them about school and meeting new people. I went on and on about friends I had made. I would catch my brother smiling at this. He knew how difficult this task was for me previously.

I promised I would watch their set before parting ways and making my way over to the merch booth. Harper hadn't arrived just yet so I stayed put behind the counter. I started playing with my cellphone absentmindedly, arranging the settings and going through pictures I had taken.

I was startled when the doors to the sides of the booth burst open and kids poured in, filling practically every spot in the venue. Immediately, fans rushed up to the booth. I mentally cursed Harper for not being here, but I decided to get to my job anyway.

I had sold about twenty shirts before Harper came around. She headed straight into the booth, past me and started taking orders. I rolled my eyes and turned my attention back to the customer in front of me.

"Y-you're Johno's sister." The girl's eyes widened and lips parted.

It was as if everyone in the entire venue heard this girl's statement and stared at me in awe. In actuality it was most of the people on line and surrounding the booth. Behind me, Harper scoffed, something she only did when she was annoyed. I ignored this and turned my attention back to the girl.

"Yeah. That's me."

The girl smiled wide. "I saw you once at The Maine's hometown show." I hadn't realized till now that the girl was probably around seventeen years old. "I used to live in Arizona, but moved."

"Oh really? Tempe?"

"The town over," She chuckled. "I know this may sound creepy, but most people here know who you are. They're probably just confused to why you're working at All Time Low's merch booth."

"Oh yeah," I bit my lip, the laughed. "I'm friends with the guys and they offered me a job this summer."

"That's cool."

She asked me for an All Time Low shirt, which I gladly gave her. Before walking away she turned to me once more, "Okay, this is going to sound really creepy again, but a lot of fans know you and Garrett went out-"

How did people find this stuff out?

"And you're probably going to get a lot of shit because of it. But really, don't listen to them. I can tell just from the brief conversation we had that you're a good person."

I admired this girl. I suppose that it would take a lot of courage just to come up to me a flat out say that.

"Thank you," I nodded my head, "really."

She smiled. "No problem."

The girl wandered off and for the next twenty minutes or so, we were packed with customers. It calmed down though, once everyone found their spot on the floor in the venue. Occasionally, Harper and I had one or two people come up and ask us for stuff, but that was just about it.

Once it settled down, I sat next to Harper and gave her a sympathetic smile.

"Do you wanna tell me what's wrong?"

Harper sniffled and looked away from me. She then looked down at her feet, opened her mouth, but only a small crack in her voice came out.

"Aw hun," I wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close to me.

"It's Matt," She sniffed and looked at me with her wide eyes. "I feel like he doesn't even care about me anymore."

"He's working Harper. He can't be there twenty four seven."

"I know," She wiped a tear from her eye, "It's just frustrating. Our whole relationship has been shitty lately."

As Harper said this, the lights in the venue dimmed and the stage lights brightened. The first band ran out and went right into their first song. It was then that I noticed the guy in the hallway, Joel, singing. I furrowed my brow, but ignored this.

"Maybe you should just give him some space to do his job. Then he'll realize how much he misses you." I grinned and winked.

She laughed softly. "You're right."

We watched the rest of the This Century- Joel's band. Soon, A Rocket To The Moon took the stage and I was left laughing at Halvo the entire time.

Harper mumbled something under her breath that I couldn't hear. When I asked her, she simply shook her head and looked away,

My heart was pounding a mile a minute as A Rocket To The Moon finished up their set. The music and their drummer pounding on the drums didn't help me either. I knew what was coming next.

The lights in the venue turned on once the band was off the stage. The Maine was supposed to be on in less than five minutes. My feet eagerly tapped and my entire body couldn't stop moving. When a fan came out to the booth I would quickly jump over to them and take their order.

The minute the lights dimmed once again is when my heart stopped. I nearly froze in my spot and I caught onto my breath. I swallowed hard, walking back to Harper and sitting down. The crowd erupted in cheers as the five familiar figures took the stage, one in particular standing out.

Of course he had to be the last one to get on the stage. It was so corny and cliche to me, but god, I couldn't move or speak or do anything normal. I just sat there, wide eyed and in complete and utter shock.

His hair. His hair was fucking red. Well, not red, but had a hint of red within this dark brown color. And the way he dressed? He was wearing a fucking tie and vest- hands down the most formal on the stage.

The guys kicked off right into a song and I don't think I had ever seen him move as much before. He walked back and forth and side to side, unaware and not really caring about anyone around him. He seemed to be completely unfazed that millions of fans were screaming at him. He was in his own little word- his perfect world.

It hit me right then and there that this was what he always wanted. He wanted to be that rock star that just completely zoned out on stage. My heart warmed and I felt proud oddly. I was happy for him. I was so happy.

Before I knew it the first song was over. John's voice saying hello to the crowd and introducing the band broke my trance. It was then that I wondered if anyone told Garrett about me. For whatever reason, I highly doubted it.

"Yo, yo, look at that!" Garrett yelled into the mic, pointing to something in the crowd. I had to blink repeatedly before registering what he had said completely.

"What?" John asked, holding a hand over his eyes.

"They made shirts! Those are so sick!"

John chuckled lightly. "Man, I want one."

"No! Wait-" Garrett shouted, covering his eyes with his hands. "Don't take them off! Keep your clothes on! No!"

I couldn't help but let out a light laugh. Harper looked over at me, a smile on her lips. "That's him, isn't it?"

I bit my lip, stifling my smile. "Oh yes."

Harper grinned. "He's cute."

My heart twisted and I felt this odd pain in my stomach. Oh god, he was cute. He was so goddam cute and I had him to myself at one point.

The guys launched off into their next song. I sort of felt guilty for ignoring my brother and the rest of the guys on stage, but I couldn't keep my eyes off of Garrett. He was fucking everywhere at once and it thrilled me.

Before I knew it, the set was over and the guys were running off stage. I had this sort of empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to see more.

Harper noticed me and laughed lightly. "Go." She simply said.

"What?" I asked.

"Go and see them. See him. I know you want to."

"I have to work."

She rolled her eyes. "I was gone for the first twenty minutes. And Matt's not going to see because All Time Low is going on next. Honestly, you've seen their set so many times. The only thing you're gonna miss is a bunch of dick jokes."

Before she could say anything else I was out of the booth. "Thank you! I owe you!" I shouted before running backstage.

I must have missed them by minutes because they weren't there. I searched around, then thought about the dressing room. I walked down the hall, trying my best to keep myself from running. A smile flew upon my lips when I saw their dressing room door wide open.

As I walked inside, I bit back a smile. I nearly jumped on Kennedy's back, wrapping my arms around his neck and standing on my toes.

He spun around, some sort of food in his mouth spilled out when he smiled. He wiped his lips with his sleeve before saying anything. "Hey!"

"You guys were amazing! Really, really good!"

"Thanks! As you can see, nobody is in here," Kennedy laughed and extended his arms. I looked around and discovered he was right. "I was just about to go to the bus. Wanna come? Or do you have to work....?"

"No! I'll come. Sure. I'm off for the rest of the night." I smiled victoriously although I was sure that I wasn't off. I probably had to be back by the end of All Time Low's set.

"Sweet, follow me."

I loved being back with Kennedy. We joked around and laughed about the time him and Halvo showed up as my dates for a school dance because I was stood up.

"I'm so glad you liked the set," He glowed. "I could tell John was nervous."

"Seriously?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow.

He shrugged. "Yeah. He likes to impress you."

I smiled. "Well you guys certainly did."

Kennedy and I arrived at the bus. He opened the door and climbed up the stairs. I took steady and deep breaths, but then mentally told myself to knock it off. I shouldn't be nervous. Garrett and I were once friends too.

"DID YOU LIKE OUR SET?!" Pat screamed from his position standing on the couch the second I walked into the front lounge.

"Of course I did!" I laughed. "You guys were great!"

"Really? You liked it?" John asked, his eyes wide.

"Yeah! I loved it."

John smiled and turned his attention back to filling his cup with some type of alcohol. Jared took the opportunity to introduce me to some of the crew members. Vito, Max, and Tim all welcomed me with open arms and laughed at that fact that I was John's sister. I'm not too sure what was so funny about that, but I went along with it.

"Okay! Now I'm gonna give you a tour of the bus!" Jared, smiled. "Now, we have to form a single file line because the bunk hallway gets kind of tight."

Jared fell in behind me and guided me to the bunk hallway. "Press that button next to the door. It should open then."

I did as he told me, laughing lightly. I looked back at Jared, raising my eyebrows. "Pretty high tech gear you have hear, eh?"

Jared didn't respond, in fact his smile fell. I cocked an eyebrow then turned back around. My heart stopped and I caught my breath. My mind wasn't registering what was happening. I had almost forgotten all about it.

Moments ago, the only thing that separated us was some electronic, beige door. Not we were face to face, unable to say or do anything remotely functional. We just stared. Those familiar, icy blue eyes electrifying and sinking into me. His glasses were on, the same ones that he wore the first I ever saw him in. There was a tiny scratch in the corner that I'm sure no one aside from him ever noticed.

Finally, the silence was broken.

"Oh," He stuttered, somehow getting a grasp on the situation at hand. "Hi."

My heart sank. Hi? That was it? A whole year and all I got was a Hi? I suppose it shouldn't bother me, but it did. I was expecting something more even though I shouldn't.

I perked up, straightening my back and coming back to reality. The bus behind me fell silent, waiting for me to say something, say anything.

But I couldn't. All I could think about was the last time I saw him. The hotel room, the way he looked down at the ground, avoiding any form of eye contact with me.

"Hi," I choked out, nodding my head and spinning around on my heel. Everyone on the bus was looking at me, waiting for something.

"I probably have to get back to work now. I sort of snuck away so I could see you guys."

Behind me, Garrett scoffed. "Well I'd say you've turned into the bad-ass."

I turned around, wanting to smile at his joke, but unable to. He now stood there, his arm leaning up and against the door frame. It exposed a peace tattoo. My eyes widened at it, but after blinking multiple times I turned back around.

"I'll see you guys later." I nodded my head, walking towards the front of the bus.

John caught my arm before I could go any further than the front lounge. "Do you really have to go back? You just got here."

I shrugged and let out a breath.

"You know how it goes. Duty calls."