Bruised and Beat Up

I guess you could say I have a pessimistic view now. I will never again expect anything good to last long. I guess that’s why I was so against Brydan. I know that it won’t last forever. I’m not stupid, just realistic. Who knows if I’ll be alive this time next year. My mom might have already killed me next fall. It’s a sad fact, but it could happen nonetheless. She’s unpredictable, just like she was this morning. I don’t know what to expect.
I parked and slowly slid out of my car. My body is still pretty banged up. I have pain medication, but it doesn’t stop all of the hurting, and I’m going to start hurting even more than I do now. Stupid doctors and their pain medication restrictions…they’re stupid. After I retrieved my bags, I headed toward the entrance of the school. Per usual, Brydan was waiting for me with a dazzling smile on his face. I smiled and wrapped my sore arms around his shoulders. I nestled into the crook of his neck. His deep chuckle sounded muffled from my position. His arms held me tight, but not tight enough to hurt me, to his body.
“I honestly don’t see what he sees in her,”
“She’s such a freak!”
“She’s scary, Latish, not a freak.”
“Whatever. Raavi Hensley shouldn’t have a guy like Brydan Willis. It’s a simple fact, really.”
I sighed, and nestled deeper into Brydan.
“Don’t listen to them, V. I love you not any of them,”
“Thanks,” I mumbled, just loud enough for him to hear me. “You’re not as bad as I thought you would be,”
“A compliment only you could make sound nice,” He replied, pulling away from our embrace to look at me. “You look gorgeous,”
“Thanks,” I blushed. “I uh….thought you might like it.”
“I do,” He replied before kissing me sweetly. “I have to get to class early though. If I’m late again, I might get a detention.”
I rolled my eyes.
“God forbid that you’ll get a detention,”
“Please, my dad would kick my ass if I did.”
I suddenly felt uncomfortable when he said that.
“O-oh.”
“Raavi, I was joking,”
“I-I know,” I agreed, pushing a smile on my face. “I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Okay,” Brydan agreed. “I love you,”
I rolled my eyes.
“Get to class, Romeo.”
“I will,” He laughed before turning around and walking away. I watched as he did. He was walking backwards until he got far enough down the way. The goofball blew me a kiss and shouted at me once more. “I love you, Raavi Hensley!” before he turned around and disappeared in a different hall way. I shook my head and him, having a smile glued to my face.
“You know that it’s just a matter of time before he realizes how big of a loser you are, right?”
I turned toward the squeaky voice.
“Piss off, Ashley,”
“What’s wrong, Raavi? You can’t handle the truth? Brydan deserves so much better than some scary freak who has no friends,”
“Okay, Ashley, listen to me carefully. One, I don’t want friends, hence why I only have two plus Brydan. Two, it’s whom, not who. Please learn how to speak proper English.” I rolled my eyes and started to walk away.
“That’s right, Raavi! Walk away like the coward we all know you are! You’re not scary! You’re just some poor, drunken bitch’s useless daughter. No one likes you!” she called. “Brydan is probably playing with you. You’re some sort of charity case.”
Her normally useless words flew at me quickly.
“Fuck. Off.” I called over my shoulder while I rose up my middle finger before walking out of the door again. Fuck this. I can’t deal with Ashley during first period. I’ll just go somewhere until second. It’s not worth staying there and getting harassed to the point where I’m begging my mom to kill me.
It’s not worth it.
She’s not worth it.