With a Lack of Wanderlust

Liam’s POV

Impatiently awaiting Harry, I stood at the top of the stairs and listened to whatever my ears allowed me to hear. It was funny how readily Harry would help me, even against his closest friend. Although I took advantage of it, I still felt a twinge of guilt. I always did. I knew it wasn’t right, with my mates or not, but it gave me an overwhelming sense of either security or superiority. I couldn’t tell which, but all I knew is that it made me feel insanely better.

“STOP BEING SUCH A TEASE, LOUIS!” I heard Harry scream and let out a quiet laugh at how idiotic he sounded.

Moments later, there was a sound of someone stumbling and my stomach dropped as him and Lou came hurrying up the stairs. Louis gave me a condescending glance as he passed me on his way to the bathroom, but I shook it off, looking at my accomplice expectantly.

“Horan’s aware,” He shook his head, out of breath, “He brought it up, so I just bolted.”

“Brilliant,” I sighed sarcastically, closing my eyes in frustration. My heart sped up a bit as I began to assume that Isabelle now knew as well. I was going to ask Harry, but he spoke up before me.

“I shouldn’t do this for you anymore. It’s too much trouble.”

My eyes snapped open, “So what do I do now?”

“What you did before he seemingly got it the way, I guess.” Harry shrugged. My mind flooded with more questions to ask him, but before I could, he ran past me, probably going to hide.

With another sigh, I began to pace like always, my breathing becoming a bit heavier and my stomach tying and retying itself in knots. I ran my fingers anxiously through my hair before cautiously making my way down the carpeted stairs. I peaked my head into the kitchen where Niall and Isabelle were having a laugh. She didn’t look mad, but I couldn’t be sure, so my hope was barely restored.

“Knock knock,” I said quietly with a small smile, walking in.

They both turned to me.

“Hey Liam!” Isabelle was surprisingly happy, ecstatic almost, “Want some pancakes? I made a lot!” I had a hard time telling whether or not there was sincerity in her voice or grin. She seemed like the type that could bottle everything up inside for the sake of being nice, unless it was devastatingly affecting her.

“Maybe later,” I said. I didn’t think my overpowering guilt would allow my stomach to keep anything down until I knew I wasn’t in too much trouble with this girl. I stayed quiet as I tried to figure out what to do next. Before I could, though, Niall looked at me with discontent and I was pretty sure of what he was about to say.

“Can I have a moment with you, Payner?”

Yep.

He didn’t even let me respond, getting up and grabbing my arm forcefully. He pulled me toward the hallway and then up the stairs, probably to make sure Isabelle was out of earshot. Once we got to my room I got a chance to really look at him. He was mad, too mad. It was as if steam could come out of his ears any second. The last time I’d seen him this upset at me was almost a year ago when I…well…did the same as I was doing to Louis, to him.

“I thought you were done with this?” He finally spoke, trying to sound calm but failing. I just shrugged, looking down and feeling quite nauseous. I didn’t want to play dumb; it was too obvious that I knew exactly what he was talking about. “Just because it worked with Danielle and I got sick of your games and altogether gave up talking to her, doesn’t mean Louis will.”

He would bring it up. I hated to see him absolutely gutted and he knew what got to me. “I’m sorry.” Was all I could say.

“How many times are you going to say that, Liam?” He shook his head and looked around for a moment, infuriated, “You know, I never get mad at anyone. Especially if they apologize. But it’s blatant that you are not sorry! You still haven’t learned!”

“I just don’t know what to do, okay?” I was getting mad now. I was sorry. I was sorry. I was sorry. Was I? Now that Danielle and I had broken up, sure. But when we were dating, I wasn’t so sure.

“Oh, I don’t know man, Louis seems to be getting somewhere by trying to get on with her instead of trying to make you look like an arse!”

“Okay,” I looked down and licked my lips before asking the question that had been on my mind the last 20 minutes, “Is Isabelle mad at me?”

“No.” He said dully, as if he thought she should be, “She actually understood. But she will be mad if you keep playing stupid practical jokes.”

“I won’t.” I said as sincerely as I could’ve. I really did need to stop it. I didn’t want Louis or Isabelle mad at me. I could do it, couldn’t I? Of course I could. Right? Probably not. Niall smiled with a look of a achievement and without another word, walked out of my room and into the one he and Zayn were staying in. I followed him quickly, “You’re not going back down?”

He was beginning to really unpack, “No, she’s all yours now,” he laughed a little, “I’ve got stuff to do.”

“Alright,” I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly as I made my way back down the stairs. I walked quietly into the kitchen where Isabelle was cleaning up after her and Niall, “You don’t have to do that you know.”

She jumped, startled, before looking back at me with a smile, “I like to clean,” she giggled.

“Well I could do it later, it’s fine. My mum expects me to anyway.” I leaned against the table and cleared my throat, “So, uh, do you want to do that hanging out now?”

“Sure,” She set down the plate she was holding into the sink and followed me into the living room.

This was where my mind went blank. I hadn’t had a single clue what to do or say. I felt absolutely hopeless as we both sat on the couch where her and Louis had been sitting just the day before. She had got on with him straight away, but it wasn’t like that with me. No, with me it always seemed to be tense.

“Do you have Mario Kart?” She broke the silence and seemed to be looking at my Wii. It was like every time she spoke, she gave me another reason to like her even more.

I nodded, moving over to set it up. As I did, someone came down the stairs and I looked up, hoping it would be Niall to give me some help in the entertaining department. To my disappointment, it was Louis.

“Hey,” he walked over to where we were, standing behind the couch. His damp hair stuck to his forehead and he hadn’t made time to put his contacts in, but Isabelle still looked up at him as if he was godly or something. I rolled my eyes, continuing to set up the game. “What are you guys playing?”

I looked back up as Isabelle answered him, and he had made his way around the couch and right next to her, where he would wrap an arm around her, just like yesterday. My stomach knotted up again and it felt like I hadn’t any control over anything anymore.

I could never understand how people did that. It was like nothing was off limits. He could put his arm around her and it wouldn’t matter, like there wasn’t any reason he shouldn’t. Like there wasn’t a possibility she would reject him. I was the complete opposite, and my brain told me not to do basically anything that would even remotely get me closer to her.

“Mind if I join you, mate?” There was a vengeful glint in his eye, as if to say ‘it doesn’t matter what you do,’ and I realized that Niall was right. He and Louis were completely different, and Louis wasn’t going to let up.

I nodded hesitantly, clearing my throat, “Uh, yeah. Sure. Whatever.”

---

Isabelle’s POV

I used to always wish that various boys would faun over me, but now that it was presented right in my face, I wasn’t certain that I liked it too much. You could cut the tension in the room with a knife, and even if they were silent, Louis and Liam were obviously unhappy with each other.

It was a good thing for me, in a way, because now it was pretty obvious that Louis had found interest in me. But it was also a bad thing, for obvious reasons. I didn’t want Liam to be hurt. He was too much like me; I was scared of inflicting emotional pain on someone like myself.

They stared each other down, in the least dramatic way possible, as the menu screen popped up onto the television. “I didn’t know you wore glasses, Lou!” I said in an attempt to advert his attention from Liam.

“Oh yeah,” he turned to me with grin, pulling them off for a moment and looking at them, “I don’t wear them too often.”

“Are you like, blind?” I asked with a laugh. He removed them again and handed them to me, the smile on his face never fading. I placed them in front of my own eyes, unprepared for the blurriness of the lenses that, if I kept them on any longer, would give me a head ache. Still, I left them on, turning to Liam, and then to Louis. “How do I look?” I giggled, gripping the sides in preparation of removing them as my cornea felt like it was going to implode.

“Beautiful,” Louis was charming, his accent making me even more overwhelmed. I felt the butterflies fluttering around my stomach. This had to be a joke; there was no way a guy like him could find interest in me.

“LIKE A SEXY LIBRARIAN.”

Louis and I turned our heads to where the voice had come from. It was Zayn, apparently passing by the living room into the kitchen. I hadn’t even heard him come downstairs. He merely waved at us.

“Go tell that to Joy, Zayn,” Louis said in a teasing voice, sticking his tongue out at the boy.

“Shut up,” he responded with a small smile before leaving our sight. It confused me, but it didn’t matter. I had no involvement in any of it.

Louis turned back to me, finally taking the glasses and putting them back on.

“You look beautiful in them, too,” I managed, laughing a bit with each word. He gave me the most feminine smile he could have possibly given as he playfully pushed me to the side.

“Tanks gurl.”

“Okay,” Liam groaned. I looked back at him to see him annoyed as ever, “Can we please play now. Thanks.”

If Louis and I were to ever become closer (which I doubted), this boy was going to make it the worst experience of my life. I already felt bad about bothering him, and I wasn’t even sure if Lou was just being friendly or not. What I did know, was that being able to have a stable relationship with a boy was too good to be true and would only exist in my own mind.