With a Lack of Wanderlust

Isabelle’s POV

We were already about a half hour into playing Mario Kart, and the only person that had won the entire time was Liam. He wasn’t even trying to show off, it just seemed to be natural for him. Either way, Louis and I hadn’t even come close to catching up to him, and it didn’t seem likely that we ever would. Liam was always in first place, I fluctuated between 3rd and 4th, and Louis stayed stagnant at 8th place, the lowest being 12. It was just impossible.

“HELL YEAH,” Liam threw his arms up in success for the 1000th time, his shirt rising up to reveal a pair of florescent purple boxers.

I giggled, leaning myself on Louis. They both looked at me confused and I bit my lip, “Liam your boxers don’t match your shirt.”

It was something my friend Valerie and I used to joke about all of the time with the boys at our school. We would often see guys with their jeans sagging, showing what no one really wanted to see first-hand. 9 times out of ten they wouldn’t even match.

“What?” He looked down at his orange and blue flannel and lifted it up a bit to get a look at his underwear. “Oh.” He looked at me with a raised eyebrow and a small smile, as if to say ’And that matters, why?’

“They’re supposed to match,” I gave him a mock frown and then let out another light laugh. He chuckled too, shaking his head and walking closer to me.

“I wouldn’t suspect that your underwear matches that shirt of yours, now does it?” He pointed to my bright green v-neck.

Louis cleared his throat beside me and I noticed Liam give him a smirk before turning back to look at me. I gave him a smug smile and batted my eyelashes, myself not even being prepared for what was about to escape my lips.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

I was definitely a new person in Birmingham, New England.

“IM IN NINTH PLACE NOW, WHAT THE FUCK!” Louis stated abruptly. Liam backed up to where he was before and we both noticed that the rankings were now on the screen. Liam was in first -- as always and I’d made it up to second. But Louis obviously wasn’t doing too hot. Liam continued to smirk in his direction.

“I’m surprised you’re not in 69th place.” Zayn laughed from behind us, coming down the stairs again with an empty bowl that had been filled with cereal only about an hour earlier.
Louis grabbed the pillow from beside himself and flung it at him, nearly hitting a lamp and getting no where close to Zayn. “Go 69 with Joy, you fuck!” He laughed, reaching over me and grabbing the other pillow. He tried, but failed again.

“I WILL NOT. I AM A GENTLEMAN. WHY DON‘T YOU--” He ran into the kitchen without another word as Louis stood, picking up the couch cushion.

He replaced it, sitting back down and looking at the screen again. He glanced at me with a frown.

“It’s okay, Louis, you’re still number one in my heart.” I patted his back with a laugh and he smiled wide.

It still amazed me how comfortable I was beginning to feel with them. It was just like they gave off this welcoming vibe, that you couldn’t stay away from, even if you were me. Even if your name was Isabelle and you’ve never spoken to a guy as easily as the way I was since your brother.

“Okay,” Liam sighed, pressing a button on his Wii remote, “Want to play again?”

“I don’t know,” Louis sunk down in his seat, “I suck.”

“No no no,” I jumped up from the couch and put my hand out. He grabbed it and stood along with me, “I bet you’ll get higher than 5th place in this one.”

I notice Liam glance at me and I smiled at him as Louis stood and pondered for a moment. He grinned uneasily back at me.

“Okay fine.” Louis got up on his toes, stringing out the last word before standing normally again. Liam hit another button and we began playing like we had been.

Except this time was a bit different, and it confused me greatly why it would be like it was. Liam began slipping on every banana peel, getting hit with every shell, and falling into every lava pit that he came into contact with. If he was doing it on purpose, I couldn’t understand why. And if it was randomly happening, that would be extremely weird, seeing that my “prediction” would become true.

It seemed to be the former, however. Liam’s victorious smile never seemed to falter once.

“Liam, what are you doing?” I asked just after he’d fallen into another pit of lava, forcing him to restart for the third time. He just shrugged, pressing another button and appearing to force a frown on his face before slipping on another banana peal in which Louis had thrown.

I merely shrugged along with him. Maybe it actually was the latter, or he was just getting tired of playing.

Finally, when the game was over and the rankings showed up, Liam was now down at eighth place, I was at fourth, and Louis was at third. He turned to me and held his hand in the air, and I responded, high-fiving him as best I could with a laugh. Within seconds of that movement, he pulled me in for a hug.

No matter how comfortable I could feel with the boys, there always seemed to be moments where I would go back to how I thought I should feel. This was one of those moments.

I cleared my throat, glancing at my phone to check the time. “Well, um, I should probably go before my mom sends out a search party,” I looked at Liam and waved, zipping up my, or Louis’, hoodie as the pitter-patter of rain began to sound on the roof above.

“I could walk you with an umbrella, if you’d like,” He responded, turning the television and game console off.

“No that’s fine, it‘s just next door.” I smiled, making my way to the door, “But thanks!”

Just as I opened the door, Louis silently hurried over to me, and the butterflies unleashed themselves in my stomach once again as he looked in my eyes. I tried not to turn away.

“There’s a hood,” He laughed, pulling it up over my head, and I let out the breath that I had been holding in. Who was I kidding to think anything else would’ve happened there? I’ll give you the answer: No one.

Louis glanced out as I opened the screen, the smell of rain filling my nose, “So I’ll see you tonight then?” He had a small, shy smile.

“What?” One foot was out the door and I felt like I was in a rush. He was now leaning against the frame with the same look on his face, and he quickly glanced over at my backyard, as if it was some kind of secret.

“Oh, yeah. If it’s not still raining.” I’d fully stepped outside and was still feeling quite awkward. I waved quickly with a grin and turned back to where I was staying.

--

Once I’d gotten back home, I’d finished organizing my suitcase and then pulled out my summer reading so I could get it done early. I was surprised to notice that Louis’ sweatshirt had hardly gotten wet, but it was barely raining and I’d practically ran once he’d closed the door, so I should’ve expected it.

It was only 10pm when I began to hear inconsistent, but continuous pings on my balcony window. I had a clue as to what was going on, but I thought it would be much later. However, as I opened the doors and a pebble flew in my face, my assumptions seemed to be true.

“What is with you British boys throwing slash kicking things up to my face here?” I leaned over the edge to see Louis face palming just like Liam had. He looked up at me with an embarrassed laughter and held his hands out. “I’m not sure I can trust you now,” I joked before jumping, or basically falling, into his arms once again.

“So,” He didn’t let me down this time, walking toward the back, “Is this gentlemanly enough? I’m trying to keep up with my image.”

“No,” I kept a straight face and his smile dropped slightly. Once I started laughing, he rolled his eyes, his bright face returning, and set me down on the grass.

“You’re a life ruiner, you know?”

We sat down across from each other and I pulled out a chunk of wet grass, throwing it at him, “Yeah, I get that a lot,” I looked down and continued to pick at the ground.

“Oh.” I looked back up. Louis was uneasily scratching his neck, “So I was thinking about what you said yesterday, and I want to help.”

“What?” I was honestly confused. There wasn’t anything anyone could really ‘help’ me with.

“I mean I don’t care if you don’t want to tell me why, but I’d, um..” He paused for a moment. It felt like just it had right before Liam had asked what I knew was coming next, but thankfully this time I had no balcony to push him off of. And for some reason, I felt no urge to, even though I was still feeling uncomfortable. “I’d like to take you out,” He said quickly, “I mean with all five of us. It would be enjoyable, right?”

There was no way. Not since I‘ve been off my meds. Not since what happened. Not without my brother. No way, no how. No, no, no. … “Maybe.”

“Life ruiner!” He threw a piece of grass at me with a chuckle, “So indefinite!”

“Sorry,” I laughed it off along with him, returning the favor. I wasn’t so sure if I could handle it. It did feel a bit like I was with Nick when I was with them, so I might have been able to, even at that point in time. But I still would have rather been safe than sorry, with going out, along with getting closer to him and the boys.