Your Body Is a Wonderland

So, those hips. Your amazing, jean filling, girly hips. I love your hips more than any part of your body. I love to kiss them, bite them, bruise them, see them in jeans. I fucking love seeing your hips in jeans.

Let me paint the picture for you about the hips in the jeans. Your hips have a couple ways they look in jeans, but these two are my absolute favorite.

The first look is after we've had sex on set and they need us immediately. Your jeans seem to sit low on your hips, much lower than Sam would ever wear them. So when we're leaving yours or my trailer, and you walk in front of me, your shirt rides up a little and I can partly see the muscles of your back. I shiver in delight at the thought.

The second look is right after you shower and you're wearing your own jeans, and their falling down, 'cause you don't have your belt on yet. Your hips make the perfect V down into your jeans. The fact that I know what's at the end of that V is just... Okay let me stop that train of thougt before this letter becomes superficial.

Anyway, there's one special thing about your hips that makes me laugh every time I think about it. Like it's just a funny thought, I get whenever your hips are shaking or moving. SO just don't be mad when I say this.

You have, the girliest hips of any man I've ever met. Like they're narrow, but wide at the same time. You have, and don't take this as a bad thing, birthing hips. Your hips are made for giving birth. Not that, that is possible, but if it was you've got the hips for it.

Now with that said, I just want you to to know, that not only are they birthing hips, but they're baby makin' his too, and that's amazing. I'm sort of hinting at something here, but I feel like I'm being way to subtle about it, so I'm just gonna come right out and say it.

I know that men giving birth is impossible, but if it were possible, I'd only want to have babies with you. I'd want your birthin' hips all to myself, and I'd use them to their potential.

My point is, that I want to do everything, with you and only you. I want to marry you, have kids with you, get old with you and everything sappy like that.

When I think about how your hips are made for havin' babies it puts me into deep thought about our future, and how amazing it will be, to just be with you and hold you forever and ever.

And I'm gonna hold you, right where my hands fit best, against your hips.

So if this letter doesn't explain to you how unsuperficially I love your hips. After our wedding, and you read this, I'll spend as much time as it takes worshipping those hips until you understand exactly what they mean to me. I adore them and the person who's body they are a part of.