Why Won't You Just Let Me Die!

My phone starts blasting its sound. Time for school. Going across my room I see the blood as dried. Same thing everyday grab some clothes, shower, watch news for a few minutes, and leave for school. Clothes black as usual and the shower so hot its like nails raining down on me. At least I can feel something. Going down stairs my step parents had the idea of putting pictures from when I was young till now and they plan on keep going. All it is to me is a constant reminder of my decent into hell. The kitchen is full of noise of breakfast being made and the smell. The smell is delicious it makes me almost want to go in and get something to eat, almost. According to the others in school I shouldn’t eat anything im too fat as it is. So I pass by the kitchen and just dive on the couch and turn on the T.V.
“The murderer in Crowley town has been found and sentenced to death today by lethal injection” the news reporter says with a sigh of relief. A emersion into sadness falls over me hearing this. Why? I have no idea it just feels depressing and makes my imagination go wild…
Walking into school with the knife in my hand I see Scott. The boy who has always tried to look better by making me look worse. It seems darker in here.
“What you gona do with that? Cut yourself in the bathroom as usual?” Scott says it like its an original insult
“Cut myself? Why I never. I would never do such a thing” lunging forward I feel like there is nothing I can do to stop myself. The knife enters his gut. Blood flows out everywhere. It won’t stop. Seeing my blood is one thing but I have never seen someone else’s and I never bleed this much. Scott falls he begins puking a pool of blood endlessly. Everything is turning a blood red. The doors shut and lock me in with Scott lying there dying. The blood is getting up to my ankles and it still hasn’t stopped yet it spills faster and I lose control again diving on his dead body making more holes for blood to escape.
“Die! Die! Die! No more pain! No more!” I don’t know who is controlling me. I have ways of controlling myself I would never do this. I see myself drinking the blood getting it all over me. I start puking and see the devils face on myself, smiling with pride at his new found slaughtered lamb. The blood has gotten high now I have to force myself to swim up. But in the ceiling lights reflection I see myself locked inside as the devil takes control and drags me under to drown.
“Your going to be late.”
“What? What just happened?” I reply to the voice happy to see a familiar face of my step mother.
“Barren honey you fell asleep watching the news your going to be late the bus is waiting for you.”
The feeling of blood rushing to my head when I get up happens except its much worse dizzy I fall over.
“Oh! Would you like some help I think I better just drive you to school today.” Being lifted up by your step mother who couldn’t be in to much better shape then Betty White really opens your eyes on how anorexic you are.