Let's Get These Teen Hearts Beating Faster

The first day of school passed quicky, and the marauders found themselves in the common room once again.

Sirius was still acting oddly, and his friends took notice of it.

"What's up, mate?" James asked.

"Er, nothing mate. Just thinking."

"About what?" Cami asked from the other side of the couch.

Sirius glanced at her for a moment, then shook his head and looked away.

"You're not still mad at me about earlier, are you?"

"What happened earlier?" James questioned.

"Sirius was pissed off because I decided to spend my free period talking to Alex instead of lounging on a couch with him. Can you say double standards here?"

"Wait, Alex McClaggen?"

"Um, duh."

"No way, Cami. He's a prat!"

Cami rolled her eyes. "That's what you say about every guy who's interested in me. At this rate, I will die celibate."

"Good!" exclaimed James. "I don't want my little sister shagging around anyway."

"But Sirius does it! And I would not shag around like a cheap whore like some people," she looked pointedly at Sirius.

"Yeah, well like you said. Sirius is a cheap whore," Remus added.

Sirius wasn't even paying attention.

"You need someone who deserves to be with you."

"Yeah," James agreed. "Someone smart. And funny. And thoughtful. You can't get chaps like that at Hogwarts."

"I completely disagree."

"Then who?" James demanded.

"I'm not telling you. You'll just scare them away!"

James started to reply, but then just shut his mouth and nodded.

"How about you give me a list of Hogwarts guys you wouldn't mind me with," Cami addressed James.

"Okay, Hmm, give me a second."

He was quiet for quite a long time. Remus and Peter glanced at each other. Remus had confided his secret to Peter, of all people, because he knew that Peter was loyal and would never betray him. (ahem.)

"I got it!"

"Well?"

"Moony! I would add Wormy but he's just as tall as you, you'd never be able to wear heels on your wedding day, would you?"

It was quiet for a moment.

"I can't believe you remembered one of my requirements for a husband I told you when we were twelve."

"Yep. So anyway, Moony? Eh?" he wiggled his eyebrows. "I'd be chuffed if you went with him. He's never had a girlfriend, so he won't pressure you into anything, and I'm pretty sure he'd be scared to, anyway."

"Hey!" Remus interjected.

Cami stared at him like he was crazy. "You're kidding right?"

Sirius watched the conversation silently, as well as Remus.

"Okay, first of all, um, no!"

"Well why not?"

"Because."

"Give me one good morning for him."

Cami glanced at Remus. "Well...because he doesn't like me, there!"

The group looked at Remus.

"So you're saying that if Remus liked you, you'd go out with him?"

Cami mimed shooting herself in the head, but only Remus got it. "Are we really having this conversation right now?"

"Give me a better reason."

"I, er, don't like him like that."

"So you're saying that you don't find him attractive?"

Which, of course, made everything even more awkward.

"Well, on this awkward note, thank you James, I'm going to bed. Night!" and she scurried up to her bed, trying to block out that awkward, awkward situation in her head.

Why did James have to bring those topics up, anyway? Now she had no choice but to think about it. Remus. Remus Lupin. She could never think of him that way, could she?

Did she already?

Downstairs, Remus glared at James.

"Thanks a lot, mate." and stomped upstairs.

'What did I do?" James asked, as Peter ran up after him.

Sirius was still silent, staring at nothing.

"Things are getting weirder and weirder. Come on Pads," and they went upstairs as well.

As Sirius was laying in bed that night, a lot of things were going throught his head.

What just happened?

Why did it bother him so much that James was trying to set Remus and Cami up?

He only had platonic feelings for her, right?

He reserved himself to do an experiment to sort this all out the next day.

Cami walked down the girls' staircase the next morning to find James waiting at the bottom with his arms open wide. When she got to the bottom, he engulfed her.

"I’m sorry Barks, I just want what's best for you. Forgive me?"

"Sigh. Of course, Jamsie. I couldn't stay mad at my favorite Stag forever." They began walking out of the common room.

"Dear Camilia, I am your only stag."

"This is true. So, where's the rest of the gang?"

"Well, Moony's still pissed at me, so him and Peter went down early. And I have no idea where Sirius is."

"Is he mad at you too?"

"Nahh, just being distant. Strange bloke, really."

"Agreed."

When the pair entered the Great Hall, they spotted Remus and Peter at the end of the table.

James stopped to get rejected by Lily as they walked up to them, and sat down.

James stared at Remus for a straight five minutes.

"What?!"

"Forgive me Moony? You know that I love you."

"Maybe you two should shack up," Cami interjected. James flipped her off.

"Fine." Remus replied with a chuckle. "Where's Sirius? Oh. Nevermind."

James and Cami turned around to see Sirius with the leader of his fanclub, Bridgette Chamberton, wrapped around him. As soon as they sat down, she put on her hand on his lap.

"What a whore," James commented, spearing his eggs with his fork.

"Too much makeup," Remus agreed. "What do you think? Cami? Cami?"

Pointing out the flaws in Sirius' flavor of the day was a favorite pastime of theirs.

But Camilia was too busy bouncing her knee up and down and glaring to join in. "Why does he have to do that at the breakfast table? I prefer my waffles without semen, thanks," she hissed.

Remus and James shared a surprised glance. Peter just chucked.

Cami stood up. "I'm going to Potions."

"But you hate being early for Slughorn-" James started, but she had always stalked off. The three remaining Marauders looked at each other, then Sirius. What was going on?

Sirius, a little farther down the table, was thinking the same thing. But, for slightly different reasons.