I Can't Stand Alone Anymore.

I sat bolt right up in bed breathing heavily. Another one of those stupid nightmares had woken me up. I looked at Alekzander’s night stand and swore under my breath. It was 8:00; I hadn’t slept in all week and since school started the next day, I wouldn’t get the chance.

I got up, showered quickly and got dressed in a fitted blue t-shirt and baggy grey sweatpants. I dropped back onto my bed to read my book. There was no way I was going to fall back to sleep, so I occupied my time with To Kill a Mockingbird. As time passed, Alekzander got up and headed into the bathroom for his shower.

We both lounged around in comfortable silence. Ever since Saturday night, Alekzander and I had been more civil to each other. When we drove back from Mona’s house, there was no tension in the car which was surprisingly nice. Ethan kept teasing and joking around with Alekzander in the front seat. It was weird seeing him so carefree and … happy. He even said goodnight to me when we went to bed. It was like I had entered the twilight zone or something.

Sunday was pleasant too. Alekzander was back and forward through the room all day, but he didn’t ignore me or yell at me. Don’t get me wrong, we didn’t play patty-cake and exchange our life stories or anything, but there was no hostility in the air. I was actually able to relax for once.

Now, we were both awake and while we didn’t say a word to each other, there was no tension in the room. ‘Maybe this year won’t be so bad.’ I smiled to myself. The two of us just enjoyed the quiet. Well, we enjoyed it until a violent, frantic pounding on the door broke it. Alekzander and I exchanged a quick look before we both hopped to our feet.

Alekzander reached out and opened the door and something charged into the room and tackled me onto my bed. I was caught completely off guard. All I could do was close my eyes at the impact; I couldn’t even scream. I felt the weight lift off me and instinctively braced myself for the next attack, but it never came.

Laughing filled the bedroom and I opened my eyes. Ethan was standing at the end of my bed grinning from ear to ear. Emma was beside him, leaning against my bedpost tears running down her red face as she laughed. And Riley was lying on my bed. He had rolled off me and couldn’t move from his position on his back because he was laughing so hard. Alekzander was standing at the door, frozen and eyes wide from when Riley pushed passed him to tackle me.

I caught my breath and sat up. “Riley, what the hell?”

“Oh come on, Kay. It was-” he couldn’t finish because he started laughing again. I looked at Ethan for some sort of explanation, but he just shrugged his shoulders, the grin still on his face. I waited for Riley to finish his laughing fit. “It was funny,” he finished.

“I don’t see how that was funny. I thought you were a burglar or a bulldozer or something.” I said it sternly but apparently, it was hilarious. Riley started laughing again and I just rolled my eyes at him. I turned to Ethan, determined to talk to someone who was sane at the moment and since Emma was still laughing, he seemed like the best bet.

“What are you guys doing here anyway?” I asked him. Alekzander had recovered from his initial shock and was lounging on his bed listening to the conversation and looking at Riley like he was a lunatic.

“What do you mean?” Ethan replied. “We’re going on an all-expenses paid tour of the school. Complete with commentary and lunch with awesome people. Let’s go.”

“Oh yeah! I totally forgot.” I stood up excitedly and threw on my black flip-flops. I grabbed my card and turned to see Riley still on my bed. “Riley, get off your ass. You promised to show me around.”

He didn’t say anything but he got up, chuckling a little every time he and Emma would catch eyes. I went to my bedside table and shuffled around until I found my schedule. I headed towards the door after Ethan, Emma, and Riley. I paused before I left and turned to Alekzander. He hadn’t moved from his spot on his bed. He looked up at me when I stopped at the door.

“Aren’t you coming too?” He stared at me for a second. Something flickered in his eyes for a second before he frowned and shook his head. “Oh. Okay. I guess I’ll see you when we get back.”

I exited the room and turned to look at my three friends. They ushered me through the dorm hallways. They were full of people who were returning to their rooms for the school year. I had seen the cafeteria entertain more and more kids as the week had passed and now with only one day before the start of school, everyone was pretty much back. As we weaved through the hallways, the crowd thinned, and as we got closer to the academic wing, there was no one in sight.

“Why isn’t anyone else trying to find their classes?” I wondered.

The guys were walking slightly behind us, having a hushed conversation so Emma answered me. “Everyone knows where their classes are already. The newbies all came for a walk through in July. Parents ask questions and students find their classes.”

“Great. So I’m the newer than the ninth graders. I didn’t even know I was coming to Crestion in July.” I said it with mock frustration and Emma laughed with me.

“Okay children,” Riley ran up and put his arms around our shoulders as we reached the classrooms. “Here we are! Where’s your schedule, Kay? Let’s get this party started!”

“Party?” I deadpanned, but handed him my schedule anyway.

Riley studiously ignored me and looked at my paper. “First stop: World History!” He shouted. He led the way towards the staircase.

We walked up the stairs to room U05.

“Why is there a letter? Why not just have numbers?” I asked outloud.

“It’s easier this way,” Ethan answered me. “The number is just that – the number of the room, but the letter tells you what floor it’s on. So your World History class is in U05. That means it is the fifth room out of the possible 25 rooms on the U floor. The U stands for upper.”

“Oh. So U is for upper,” I started, looking down at my paper that I had swiped back from Riley. “There’s M and G as well. M is for middle?” I asked.

Ethan nodded his head. “And G is for ground, or the first floor.” I nodded my head. It made sense.

“So, who has World History with me?” When they all looked at their schedules and shook their heads slowly, I groaned. “You mean the first class I have, I have alone?”

Emma skipped over to me and pulled me into a hug. She looked down at my schedule and pointed to my second period class. “But we have Art together! And I have Ancient History in U07, so we can walk down to class together!” She smiled brightly at me and I couldn’t help but smile back.

She grabbed my hand and swung it as she led me back to the staircase, down to M19, chatting the whole way. “I’m so glad we’re in Art together. You’ll love Mrs. Nelson. She’s brilliant. She teaches all the Art classes so I’ve had her for three years now and she’s a genius.”

We continued to work through my schedule. I had Psychology with Riley and Ethan and then Business with everyone.

“That’s perfect actually,” Riley grinned. “That way we can just head from Business to lunch together. We don’t have to find each other through a swarm of people.”

“Awesome!” Emma smiled as she slipped her hand in Riley’s. He brushed his thumb across the back of her hand as he grabbed my schedule again.

“So you have Economics fifth, after lunch, G25. We all have it seventh,” Riley’s mouth turned down slightly at the corners, “when you have Math. So you’ll be by yourself for that one too. That sucks.”

“Well, I think-” I started but cut myself off. They looked at me quizzically, waiting for me to continue. ‘Ah, what the hell?’ “I think Aaron’s in Math with me.”

I waited for the awkwardness, and while there was a second of dead silence, it wasn’t what I expected.

“Well, at least you know someone.” Riley gave a weak smile before looking back at my schedule. “After Economics, you have… French? Really?” He looked at me like I was crazy.

I sighed heavily as we started walking up to the middle floor. “I know, I know. My parents made me. I hate French, but my parents’ company’s business partners are French. I’m not good at it. Terrible, really.” Riley just laughed at me.

Ethan smiled. “Well, I’m in French with you. I can help you out if you need it.”

I turned on him, eyes lit with pleasure. “Really? You are a lifesaver!”

“Pfft! Who needs French?”

“Alright, big man,” I turned to face Riley, “what are you taking?”

“Mandarin Chinese. And I’m pretty good at it if I do say so myself.” Riley grinned.

“Chinese?” I said, taken aback. “I didn’t expect that. What made you take it?”

“Well, I wanted to take Spanish, but they wouldn’t let me.” He let out a dramatic sigh.

Emma giggled at his side, playfully hitting his arm and Ethan just rolled his eyes. I looked on in confusion.

“Of course they didn’t let you take Spanish,” Ethan tried to hide his amused smirk. “You’re fluent, you idiot.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know. But it would have been so easy. And I would have been able to be in class with you, Em.” Riley grinned at her.

“Are you Spanish?” I asked him.

He nodded his assent. “Yeah, my parents moved here when they got married. They wanted me to know Spanish as well as English like them so they only speak Spanish at home.”

I whistled low. “I can’t even get the basics of a second language, and you’re taking a third.” I shook my head.

“Careful, Kay, you’ll inflate his ego too much and he’ll float away.” Emma giggled. Riley grinned mischievously and tickled her side quickly.

They walked me to where I would be taking French and then my two final classes I would have, showing me the best way to get there. I was happy that after Math, we would all be in English together.

“Aw man, we get Mr. Ritter for English!” Riley thrust his fist up in the air excitedly. “I love him, man. Best. Teacher. Ever.”

“Is he?”

“Oh yeah,” Riley continued. “Everyone loves him. He’s super chill and funny and stuff. But he teaches really well too.”

“Well, that’s good at least. Are most of the teachers here good like that?”

“Some I guess,” Ethan answered. “There are a few who are fairly awful. Like Mr. Espaillat. We have him for French.”

“Oh, that’s just great.” I scowled. Ethan laughed and swung his arm over my shoulders.

“Don’t worry about it, Kay. I told you I’ll help you out.” I smiled at him as we started to walk to the cafeteria for a quick lunch. “You think you’re set for the first day?”

“I guess so. I’m still kind of nervous.” I turned my smile to Riley and Emma as well. “I’m really glad you guys are in a lot of my classes.”

“Yeah, that’s a lucky break.” Emma was looking at me from under Riley’s arm. They looked really good together. They were pretty much opposites of each other. Emma was small, and everything about her looked like innocence from the blonde flowing hair to the fair skin. Riley was tall and his dark hair and deeply tanned skin contrasted Emma greatly. Add to that the constant mischievous glint in his eyes and it only made Emma look even more innocent. But despite the opposition in their appearance, they seemed to fit together perfectly.

Ethan spoke up from my other side. “We’re going to get breakfast together in the morning, right? 8:20?”

“Sure,” I started. “If you guys don’t mind.” The three of them looked at me weirdly. “I’ll take that as a ‘we don’t mind.’”

“Damn right you will.” Riley laughed.

We had made it to the cafeteria and after we ate, we made it back to the doom rooms. As we walked up to my door, my smile turned down a little bit at the sides.

“I guess we know why Alekzander didn’t want to come with us.” I joked looking down at my door handle.

A bleached white sock was hanging off of it.

Ethan and Emma looked at me questioningly and Riley blurted out what everyone was wondering, “is that what I think it is?”

I sighed heavily and nodded. “Yeah. We were in another fight and I blurted out that all he had to do was put a sock on the door if he ever needed his … privacy. I guess he took it to heart.”

Ethan rolled his brown eyes. “You’re not going to just stand out here are you?” At my slight hesitation, he frowned. “Oh, just go in, Kay. He doesn’t live alone anymore. You’re entitled to walk into your own room.”

“No,” He looked like he was going to argue with me but I cut him off before he got the chance to. “Things with Alekzander are actually starting to get better. I’m not going to ruin that over nothing. Besides, the day is young. Maybe I’ll just go for a drive or… oh wait, my car keys are in there… uhm…”

“Why don’t we just go watch a movie?” Emma piped up. I smiled gratefully at her. “We can watch it in my room if you want?”

“I would love that, Emma.” A wide grin was splitting my face. She took my hand and dragged me further down the hall. We weaved through the people in the hallways with Riley and Ethan following behind us. They were hushed in another one of their private conversations.

We got to Emma’s room just as a small, mousy looking boy with shaggy brown hair was leaving it. He had thick rimmed glasses and a nose that was slightly too small for his face. He smiled at Emma and I noticed that it was very sweet.

“Hey, Emma. I’m just on my way out. I probably won’t be back until tonight.”

“Okay, Owen! I’ll see you later.”

He walked away after briefly waving at her, Riley, and Ethan. Emma ushered me into the room.

Her room was set up slightly different from mine. There was a bed pushed up against the far right wall with a bright pink comforter laid across it so I assumed it was Emma’s. The other bed, covered in a navy blue bed set, was against the back wall. There was side table in between the beds, just above where each person’s head would be. The formation they were in resembled an L. A large flat screen TV was against the left wall and was sided by the standard three tiered dressers.

“I like it.”

Emma giggled. “Thanks, Kay. I do too. We moved our beds like this so we could both watch the TV.”

“So you get along with your roommate? That’s nice.”

“Yeah, it is. He’s a nice guy.” Emma walked over to the cabinet that the television was set on and opened it.

“Do you want to switch?”

Emma laughed and shook her head. “I don’t think I’d be able to handle Alek. I don’t have the guts to slap him when he’s being a jerk.” She grinned at me and I rolled my eyes. I had a feeling they would never let me live that down. “So what movie do you guys want to watch?”

We threw a movie on, but we barely watched it. We played cards while talking the afternoon away. After three movies and an uncountable number of games later, I started falling asleep on Riley.

“Hey, Kay. I think it’s time you go to bed.” He chuckled.

“No…” I muttered. “Evil overlord in my room.” He, along with Ethan and Emma, burst out laughing, which made me fall off Riley’s shoulder and almost hit the floor face first.

“Come on. We’ll help you fight the evil overlord.” Ethan laughed. He held out his hand to help me off the floor.

We walked back to my room and to my utter relief, the sock on the door was gone.

“Well, that’s good to see. No dragon to fight.” They laughed at me again before saying their goodbyes. I gave them all hugs before they left for their own rooms, reminding me about breakfast in the morning. I peeked at my phone and the numbers flashed 9:30. I was so ready for an early night before school started.

I slipped my keycard into the slot and entered my room. Alekzander was lying on his bed watching his television screen. His hair was damp from an earlier shower and he was clad only in baggy sweatpants and an undershirt. His green eyes narrowed on me as soon as I entered the room.

He immediately muted his TV and turned all his attention to me as I dropped my key and schedule on my dresser. I smiled good naturedly at him, but he scowled back.

“What’s your problem?” I asked, surprised by the sudden hostility. I walked into the closet to change into shorts and an oversized t-shirt to sleep in. He glared at me.

“Where were you?”

I looked at him oddly. “Well, dad, I was hanging out with friends.” He glared more harshly at me. “What do you want me to say Alekzander? I came back here and there was a sock on the handle, which we agreed meant do not enter. So I didn’t enter. I did what you want. I went to watch a movie with friends. Your friends. Why are you all of a sudden mad at me again?”

“Whatever.” He went over to his bed and flicked off the TV. “I hope you’re not in any of my classes tomorrow. I don’t want to see you.”

“Wow. Really, Alekzander?” He just grunted and ignored me. I flopped backwards on my bed, disappointed. Just when I had thought that the year would be bearable he had to go through a mood swing. I set the alarm clock on my phone and crawled under the blankets. I looked over at Alekzander once more. “I don’t think I’ll ever understand you.” I muttered.

If he heard me, he didn’t show it.