Status: Complete. :)
Always
Polyjuice Potion
“That’s dirty, James. Even for you, that’s really low,” Remus Lupin said quietly to his friend as he pushed his hand back through his hair, shaking his head softly. “Lily is a good girl, and even you said yourself that she has a good heart. Do you want to hurt her?”
James just shrugged and leaned back against the outer wall of the castle, smiling at his friend confidently. He understood where Remus was coming from; the other boy had always had a much softer heart despite the painful werewolf transformation he faced every month at the full moon.
“She won’t find out unless you or one of the others says something, and I know none of you will,” James said before giving his friend a small clap on the back. “She won’t get hurt, Moony. I promise.”
Remus just sighed and shrugged as he looked down at the grass, picking a few pieces and twisting them together absentmindedly. Even in the short amount of time that he’d gotten to know Lily Evans, he’d seen that she was a truly lovely person; a person with a heart much more compassionate than most here at Hogwarts, and he knew that she didn’t deserve to get hurt.
He had also noticed the way that Severus Snape still stared at her longingly, and he knew that the loner missed her. He understood why Lily was upset at the boy for calling her a mudblood; any person with her background, much less a girl, would have been upset in her shoes as well. But he also understood that sometimes, people made mistakes they never planned on making. Perhaps Severus had made just such a mistake and was now paying a far greater price than he’d thought he would have to.
He looked up when he saw the redhead in question start approaching them, and he groaned before looking at James, who was still talking about which girls he wanted to get with. Remus knew that Lily didn’t deserve that, and even if he was completely loyal to James as a friend, he didn’t want his new friend getting hurt, either.
“Hey, Lil,” he said, clearing his throat loudly so that James would know to shut up. “I thought you were up in the Common Room doing your homework?”
Lily sighed and nodded before sitting down on the grass, not concentrating on what her new friend was saying. All day, all she’d been able to concentrate on was the latest letter that Severus had sent to her through Baldric. It had been a note that had her thinking, and whenever she thought about him, she felt guilty.
She knew he was probably hurting just as much as she was about what had happened, but there was nothing to be done about it any longer. He had hurt her, and he wasn’t going to change. They both had drastically different views on life, and she didn’t want to be pulled down a road of darkness. And despite the fact that she didn’t like how her new boyfriend talked about Severus, she knew that he was right about Severus in the sense that the other boy was going to become someone very, very bad once they all left Hogwarts; perhaps even sooner than that.
Lily had always known that Severus was strange; that he was different than the others. But she hadn’t ever really minded until she’d learned just what it was that he was interested in. He always talked about the Dark Arts and how fascinated he was by them; he always talked about how he wanted to try them and see how they worked. He was interested in the Unforgiveable Curses, and even more than that, he had said a few times that he wanted to try them—though he had always promised her it would never be against her.
“Are you thinking about him again?” James asked her, looking over in her direction. Lily sighed, rolling her eyes before she could stop herself. She might have grown a little more attracted to James, but that didn’t mean she didn’t think he had a lot of growing up to do. And she also wanted him to realize that he couldn’t dictate what she thought about.
“Yes, I am. He was my best friend for six years, James. You don’t honestly expect me to stop thinking about my friendship with him overnight, do you?” She quipped, not bothering to be subtle with her annoyance.
James’ eyes widened slightly as he heard the annoyance in his girlfriend’s voice before he moved closer. “I’m not trying to make you forget about him, Lily,” he tried to tell her as he grabbed her hand in his. “I just know that thinking about him hurts you, and I don’t want to see you hurting over someone like…him.”
This time, Remus was the one to roll his eyes as he watched his best friend pull Lily’s head down onto his shoulder before he closed his eyes, wanting to get out of the scene before he said something he wouldn’t like. He’d leave that to Sirius, he told himself. The other male was always very quick with his mouth; it was something that all of the four of them admired, and Remus knew that James was more apt to listen to Sirius than to him.
He got up and left quickly, well aware that Lily was going to forgive James. He didn’t want to be around to watch the girl get hurt. She was too nice for that, and even if he couldn’t say anything to her because of his loyalty to James, it didn’t mean he had to sit around and watch it happen.
Severus glared angrily in James’ direction, not believing what he’d just heard the Quidditch player say. He couldn’t believe that the other boy—the boy who’d stolen what was his—had just bragged about how many girls he was going to get with while having Lily at his side. It infuriated him to such a level that he hadn’t felt before, and he wanted nothing more than to hurt the boy he knew was going to hurt Lily.
He didn’t pay attention to anything else as he hastily started to scribble notes onto a scrap piece of parchment. The things he was writing wouldn’t make sense to anyone else if they tried to read it; or, at least, he liked to think that it wouldn’t. He liked to come up with his own potions and such. However, this wasn’t an original potion that he was creating. Right now, he knew exactly what he needed to do in order to make Lily see James Potter for what he was—a womanizing son of a bitch who didn’t even deserve the clothes on his back.
He was writing down the ingredients for Polyjuice Potion. He already knew where he could get most of the ingredients, and for the ones he wasn’t sure where he could get them, he’d sneak into the Potions room after hours and get them from the storeroom. Slughorn would notice, but he wouldn’t assume that he had been the one to take them if he was careful.
He knew that what he was going to do would hurt Lily if she ever found out what he had done, but it was something that needed to be done to save her heart from the anguish Potter would put her through if he allowed it to happen. And his love for Lily was far too strong to allow it. He didn’t care if she never saw him the way he saw her, as long as she never had to go through pain. And the only way he knew he could do that was by transforming into none other than James Potter himself and doing something that would make Lily break up with him.
He knew he needed to be careful. He needed to find a way to get James out of the picture for a few hours while he did what needed to be done. And even more than that, he needed to make sure that everything went perfectly according to a carefully constructed plan. He knew that Lupin, Black, and Pettigrew would be able to see right through a disguise if it was any less than perfect, and Severus couldn’t allow that to happen.
If he could get Lily to see what James was up to, he knew that she’d leave him. And that was all he really wanted. He loved Lily, and he knew that this was something that might work to make her get away from him. It might take awhile to make the Polyjuice Potion, since it had to brew and be done carefully, but he knew that it would work. It just had to.
Until then, he decided that he’d write her next letter to her before getting it to Baldric. He wouldn’t say anything about James in this letter, or any of the ones after. He didn’t want to tip her off that he might be up to something, because it would throw a loop in all of his plans. And he couldn’t have that.
Lily,
Today’s the third day since we’ve stopped talking, and it seems to have been longer than that. Do you remember when we met six years ago in that small clearing between our houses? I remember it as though it was yesterday. Even then, I realized what an amazing person you are. You were strong and smart then, Lily; just as much so as you are now. But what I remember most is your eyes. I’d never seen eyes like yours before. I miss being able to see them now, but a memory will have to suffice for now. This letter might come a little late since Baldric is delivering a letter to my Mum and Dad, but I hope I finds you well.
Always your friend, Severus
He smiled as he finished writing the letter on the parchment before he rolled it and tied a small string around it. He knew that he could get it to her when his owl returned from delivering his letter, and this time, he was hoping that Lily returned a letter to him. He would understand if she didn’t, but he knew that it would make him feel better about what he was doing if she’d acknowledge everything he was doing for her and their ruined friendship.
James just shrugged and leaned back against the outer wall of the castle, smiling at his friend confidently. He understood where Remus was coming from; the other boy had always had a much softer heart despite the painful werewolf transformation he faced every month at the full moon.
“She won’t find out unless you or one of the others says something, and I know none of you will,” James said before giving his friend a small clap on the back. “She won’t get hurt, Moony. I promise.”
Remus just sighed and shrugged as he looked down at the grass, picking a few pieces and twisting them together absentmindedly. Even in the short amount of time that he’d gotten to know Lily Evans, he’d seen that she was a truly lovely person; a person with a heart much more compassionate than most here at Hogwarts, and he knew that she didn’t deserve to get hurt.
He had also noticed the way that Severus Snape still stared at her longingly, and he knew that the loner missed her. He understood why Lily was upset at the boy for calling her a mudblood; any person with her background, much less a girl, would have been upset in her shoes as well. But he also understood that sometimes, people made mistakes they never planned on making. Perhaps Severus had made just such a mistake and was now paying a far greater price than he’d thought he would have to.
He looked up when he saw the redhead in question start approaching them, and he groaned before looking at James, who was still talking about which girls he wanted to get with. Remus knew that Lily didn’t deserve that, and even if he was completely loyal to James as a friend, he didn’t want his new friend getting hurt, either.
“Hey, Lil,” he said, clearing his throat loudly so that James would know to shut up. “I thought you were up in the Common Room doing your homework?”
Lily sighed and nodded before sitting down on the grass, not concentrating on what her new friend was saying. All day, all she’d been able to concentrate on was the latest letter that Severus had sent to her through Baldric. It had been a note that had her thinking, and whenever she thought about him, she felt guilty.
She knew he was probably hurting just as much as she was about what had happened, but there was nothing to be done about it any longer. He had hurt her, and he wasn’t going to change. They both had drastically different views on life, and she didn’t want to be pulled down a road of darkness. And despite the fact that she didn’t like how her new boyfriend talked about Severus, she knew that he was right about Severus in the sense that the other boy was going to become someone very, very bad once they all left Hogwarts; perhaps even sooner than that.
Lily had always known that Severus was strange; that he was different than the others. But she hadn’t ever really minded until she’d learned just what it was that he was interested in. He always talked about the Dark Arts and how fascinated he was by them; he always talked about how he wanted to try them and see how they worked. He was interested in the Unforgiveable Curses, and even more than that, he had said a few times that he wanted to try them—though he had always promised her it would never be against her.
“Are you thinking about him again?” James asked her, looking over in her direction. Lily sighed, rolling her eyes before she could stop herself. She might have grown a little more attracted to James, but that didn’t mean she didn’t think he had a lot of growing up to do. And she also wanted him to realize that he couldn’t dictate what she thought about.
“Yes, I am. He was my best friend for six years, James. You don’t honestly expect me to stop thinking about my friendship with him overnight, do you?” She quipped, not bothering to be subtle with her annoyance.
James’ eyes widened slightly as he heard the annoyance in his girlfriend’s voice before he moved closer. “I’m not trying to make you forget about him, Lily,” he tried to tell her as he grabbed her hand in his. “I just know that thinking about him hurts you, and I don’t want to see you hurting over someone like…him.”
This time, Remus was the one to roll his eyes as he watched his best friend pull Lily’s head down onto his shoulder before he closed his eyes, wanting to get out of the scene before he said something he wouldn’t like. He’d leave that to Sirius, he told himself. The other male was always very quick with his mouth; it was something that all of the four of them admired, and Remus knew that James was more apt to listen to Sirius than to him.
He got up and left quickly, well aware that Lily was going to forgive James. He didn’t want to be around to watch the girl get hurt. She was too nice for that, and even if he couldn’t say anything to her because of his loyalty to James, it didn’t mean he had to sit around and watch it happen.
Severus glared angrily in James’ direction, not believing what he’d just heard the Quidditch player say. He couldn’t believe that the other boy—the boy who’d stolen what was his—had just bragged about how many girls he was going to get with while having Lily at his side. It infuriated him to such a level that he hadn’t felt before, and he wanted nothing more than to hurt the boy he knew was going to hurt Lily.
He didn’t pay attention to anything else as he hastily started to scribble notes onto a scrap piece of parchment. The things he was writing wouldn’t make sense to anyone else if they tried to read it; or, at least, he liked to think that it wouldn’t. He liked to come up with his own potions and such. However, this wasn’t an original potion that he was creating. Right now, he knew exactly what he needed to do in order to make Lily see James Potter for what he was—a womanizing son of a bitch who didn’t even deserve the clothes on his back.
He was writing down the ingredients for Polyjuice Potion. He already knew where he could get most of the ingredients, and for the ones he wasn’t sure where he could get them, he’d sneak into the Potions room after hours and get them from the storeroom. Slughorn would notice, but he wouldn’t assume that he had been the one to take them if he was careful.
He knew that what he was going to do would hurt Lily if she ever found out what he had done, but it was something that needed to be done to save her heart from the anguish Potter would put her through if he allowed it to happen. And his love for Lily was far too strong to allow it. He didn’t care if she never saw him the way he saw her, as long as she never had to go through pain. And the only way he knew he could do that was by transforming into none other than James Potter himself and doing something that would make Lily break up with him.
He knew he needed to be careful. He needed to find a way to get James out of the picture for a few hours while he did what needed to be done. And even more than that, he needed to make sure that everything went perfectly according to a carefully constructed plan. He knew that Lupin, Black, and Pettigrew would be able to see right through a disguise if it was any less than perfect, and Severus couldn’t allow that to happen.
If he could get Lily to see what James was up to, he knew that she’d leave him. And that was all he really wanted. He loved Lily, and he knew that this was something that might work to make her get away from him. It might take awhile to make the Polyjuice Potion, since it had to brew and be done carefully, but he knew that it would work. It just had to.
Until then, he decided that he’d write her next letter to her before getting it to Baldric. He wouldn’t say anything about James in this letter, or any of the ones after. He didn’t want to tip her off that he might be up to something, because it would throw a loop in all of his plans. And he couldn’t have that.
Lily,
Today’s the third day since we’ve stopped talking, and it seems to have been longer than that. Do you remember when we met six years ago in that small clearing between our houses? I remember it as though it was yesterday. Even then, I realized what an amazing person you are. You were strong and smart then, Lily; just as much so as you are now. But what I remember most is your eyes. I’d never seen eyes like yours before. I miss being able to see them now, but a memory will have to suffice for now. This letter might come a little late since Baldric is delivering a letter to my Mum and Dad, but I hope I finds you well.
Always your friend, Severus
He smiled as he finished writing the letter on the parchment before he rolled it and tied a small string around it. He knew that he could get it to her when his owl returned from delivering his letter, and this time, he was hoping that Lily returned a letter to him. He would understand if she didn’t, but he knew that it would make him feel better about what he was doing if she’d acknowledge everything he was doing for her and their ruined friendship.