The Beach

It was dark outside as Sawyer sat on the patio of the beach house in one of the wooden lounge chairs. She was star gazing once again, reflecting on the events of the past twenty four hours. It seemed so strange that chaos could occur in the blink of an eye.

It was just yesterday that she was spending every minute with Alex. She was carefree and building sand castles, eating from a picnic basket and enjoying the summer. She was smiling and laughing, happy and content. She had her secret summer to herself, sharing it with Alex, as tradition. Things were going so smoothly, so well. It was like every other summer. But this summer was different. Everything about this summer was different. She had a fiancée. She was engaged. She was cheating on a fiancée. This was her last summer as a free woman. This was the last summer she would have to herself. The last summer to have Alex.

Alex.

It always started and stopped with Alex. Whether Sawyer really would ever admit it to herself had yet to be seen, but everything Sawyer did, she did with the thought of Alex in the back of her mind. Now that she knew he was in a band, she followed the band. She kept track of releases, interviews and even their tour dates. She had even been to their concerts and watched them perform from the back of the venues. She never did get up close, because she knew if she started getting close, she would get as close as possible to Alex. It was just what she did. She was drawn to Alex. If she were willing to admit it, she would even say she’s in love with him. Sawyer’s world unconsciously revolved around Alexander Gaskarth.

Sawyer sighed, running her hand through her strawberry blond hair. She was so messed up, and she knew it. What person in their right mind gets upset that their affair is about to get blown. Most people would be worried, nervous. She was downright pissed off that her time was cut short. Even she knew that there was something completely wrong with her emotions. She knew that, and she knew she shouldn’t be secretly wishing for Jake’s plane to break, or crash, or go to the wrong airport. Anything but take him to Virginia Beach.

She hadn’t picked up any of Jake’s phone calls since she hung up on him earlier that morning, nor had she replied to any of his texts. She had, however, read his texts. They were full of apologies, and his itinerary. Thankfully, she had discovered that Jake only planned on staying for 3 days because of his limited vacation time. She had never been so grateful for his management job. Normally, it seemed to get in the way of their life- of her real life- but she really couldn’t be any happier that he couldn’t stay more than 3 days.

“You look like your head might combust if you keep thinking.”

Alex’s voice caught Sawyer off guard. She hadn’t really been expecting anyone to come out onto the patio. Normally, if Sawyer went onto the patio, Alex knew to leave well enough alone. This time, it seemed, was different.

Of course it was different. It wasn’t just Alex and Sawyer anymore. It was Sawyer, Alex, and everyone else.

“Yea. I might. But it would mean that I wouldn’t have to be around you and Jake at the same time.” Sawyer said simply, and Alex frowned.

“You don’t want to be around me?” Alex asked, moving from his standing position by the door to the other lounge chair next to Sawyer.

Sawyer turned to look at Alex, puzzled by his question. She was just going to throw everything out there to try and make Alex understand what was going on.

“Look, Alex, we both know that that isn’t true.” Sawyer said, taking a deep breath and turning back to the stars in the sky. “Alex, we’re only kidding ourselves when we pretend we don’t love each other. I know it, and I know that you know it. But we both know that our love doesn’t exist beyond the beach. I love you more than anyone else I’ve ever met, but we don’t work Alex. Not outside of the beach. And I love our time together, and I’m madder than hell that Jake is ruining it. I just wanted one more summer of us, and now we’re stuck in this pretend friend reunion where I have to act like I’ve known your friends for years, and it’s infuriating. I just wanted one last summer with you.” Sawyer said, her anger rising as she spoke.

Alex listened carefully, startled a bit by Sawyer’s outburst. Alex had never heard Sawyer say that she loved him. He had never said it to her either. Sure, he did love her, but as she had just stated, they didn’t exist outside of Virginia. And really, Alex didn’t know how they could exist outside of Virginia. He lived in Baltimore, when he wasn’t living on road, and she lived on the other side of the country.

But she just seemed so devastated. So upset.

“It’s three days. Three days that he will be here and three days will be over like that. It won’t be very long and we will spend every second of it together.” Alex gave her the only reassuring words that he could. He couldn’t tell her that he loved her, because nothing would change if he did. She would still be going home to Jake at the end of the summer, and he would be returning to tour with the band. Their love didn’t change anything.

“Promise?” Sawyer turned towards Alex, her eyes wide and hopeful. He gave her a small smile, reaching across the empty space between then and grabbing her hands, pulling her lightly. Sawyer took the hint and moved from her seat on the lounge chair across to Alex’s lap. As soon as she was seated, Alex wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. Sawyer rested her head against his, enjoying the comfort of the moment.

“I promise Sawyer. Summer is always ours, and Jake being here can’t change that.”