The Hangover: Part III

Night had since fallen at the Garner residence when a black, 2007 Ford Explorer pulled into the driveway, parked in front of the large garage. Doug hopped out of the passenger's seat while Phil stepped out of the driver's side, jangling his keys in his hands as he joined his shorter friend around the front of the vehicle. Phil looked up at the house seeing a window upstairs with the light on. The blinds moved, suggesting someone had just been staring down at the pair, now walking up toward the front door.

"You really think you can make Alan think this whole trip idea is his?" Doug questioned, feeling doubtful, as he peered at Phil's profile.

Phil scoffed as if it was obvious he could. "Have you met me? I could talk a nun out of her habit and make her think it was God's will."

"Dude, that is so messed up."

The twosome headed inside the house where Doug was greeted by his wife of four years, Tracy and their two-year-old daughter Sarah who was asleep, perched on Tracy's hip.

"Tracy," Phil smiled, greeting his friend's wife with a kiss to the cheek. He instinctively brought his hand to the back of little Sarah's head, touching gently down upon her soft, dark brown hair. His smile widened as he looked the toddler over. It was one of those sweet and tender moments where someone who didn't know Phil would easily assume he was Mr. Sensitive.

"Hey, Phil. How you holding up?"

He shrugged, removing his hand from Sarah's head and shoving both his hands halfway into his pockets. "I can't complain." Then, without missing a beat, "Oh, wait. Yes, I can." His genuine smile turned a bit rueful as he met Tracy's eye and then looked over to Doug.

"How's my angel?" he asked about his daughter, moving closer to place a kiss on her shoulder, then her puffy cheek which was exposed.

"She was very good tonight. She actually ate the food I put in front of her and played for a long time with her Uncle Alan till she got so pooped out she fell asleep next to Tucker on the floor."

"Aww," Doug cooed.

The pang of longing in Phil's chest for his own kids was so completely obvious by the expression on his face, but it went unnoticed by the couple in front of them as their attention was focused on their sleeping child. "So, uh..." he spoke to interrupt the pair and bring their attention back to why Phil was there. "Is Alan upstairs?"

Tracy looked, not suspicious, but immediately curious. "He's in his room. Why?"

Phil shrugged again. "Oh, just thought that since I was here I'd pay him a visit."

Tracy considered this for a moment, narrowing her eyes slightly and then gave a quick nod of her head. "Well, that's really nice of you. He'd love a visit."

"Yeah, I thought so, too." Phil smirked and threw his hands up as if saying, What are ya gonna do? "Wolf pack and all."

Tracy let out a slight laugh and raised her eyebrows. "In that case I can only imagine what's going to be entailed in this visit."

Phil looked back over at Doug and gestured to see if he was following. Doug gave his daughter another kiss and then touched Tracy's arm briefly, letting her know he would be back down soon and they could head home for the night. As he joined Phil's side, both men walked up the staircase and headed in the direction of Alan's closed bedroom door which had a 'Danger: Genius At Work' sign on it.

"I hope you're right about your skills of manipulation, Phil," Doug muttered quietly.

Rolling his eyes, Phil lifted his hand to knock on the door but before he could even make contact with his knuckles upon the surface, the door swung open, revealing Alan, grinning from ear to ear, solely at Phil.

"Phil!" Alan all but squealed. He was dressed in black, Spandex shorts and maroon robe similar to the one Hugh Hefner was known to wear.

Phil smiled charmingly. "Hey bud―" He was cut off by the abruptness in which Alan stepped forward and immediately embraced him in a hug that was tight enough to cut off air flow to Phil's lungs.

"I missed you! Hey Doug," Alan added, glancing quickly to his brother-in-law but back to Phil just as quickly. "I didn't expect you to show up here tonight. Come in." Alan stood aside with his left arm outstretched as he ushered Doug and Phil into his room, closing the door behind them after all were inside.

Doug had already been in the room more than enough to know about the contents within, but Phil had only been there once before, when Stu invited Alan to his wedding two years prior. Phil stood, turning around in place, as he took everything in. There was a Jonas Brothers poster near the bed that wasn't there two years ago, a Pac Man arcade game in one corner and so many pictures all over. Phil knew Alan had printed the photos off his camera from Vegas, but there were different photos.

"Holy shit," Phil laughed, moving over to one grouping of photos. "Where did you get the photos from Bangkok?"

Alan watched the way Phil studied the photos and smiled like a child who's parent thought their finger painting was the next Van Gogh. "I emailed Teddy and he sent them to me from his phone."

"Holy shit," came Phil's repeated comment, finding the shots amusing. He'd nearly forgot some of them as they were the only evidence of that trip as the guys had once again blacked out and had no memory of those twelve hours at all.

Doug just nodded. "Yeah, it's a good thing Stu didn't come." He pointed to a photo to the left of where Phil was staring. The photo in question was one of Stu, naked and crying with the naked tranny stripper Kimmy behind him.

"Wow." Phil turned around to look at Alan who seemed proud of his collection. "You printed out the pictures from Bangkok, too? Dude, you're not gonna remember what color your walls are pretty soon at this rate."

"I'm glad you like it. I was thinking of becoming an interior decorator."

Phil just looked at Alan again with more of a questioning gaze but shrugged it off. "Well, you'd definitely be a visionary in the field." He looked once more at the photos, noting one of him from the wedding reception where he was dancing with Stephanie. Instantly, his smiled disappeared and he grabbed the photo off the wall. "Could you get rid of this one, though, buddy?"

"Does it make you think angry thoughts about your failed marriage?"

"Alan," Doug spoke with a wary tone toward the bearded man.

"It does," Phil replied simply.

"If I were Stephanie, I wouldn't have cheated on you like a dirty whore."

"If you were Stephanie, Alan, that would be weird and unsettling, but I appreciate the sentiment."

Alan smiled and took a seat on the edge of his bed, pushing some issues of Teen People off onto the floor and patting the spot beside him for Phil to sit down. Doug smirked at the gesture and took a seat at Alan's computer desk. Casually, Phil obliged Alan. After all, he had a mission and making Alan happy was part of the mission.

"So, how've you been Alan?" Phil asked, leaning forward slightly with his hands clasped between his knees as he looked at the chubby man beside him.

"I've been pretty busy. Being a stay-at-home son and full time uncle is a neverending job. And I'm running this site online that's up and coming."

"Yeah, well, kids can be a handful," Phil conceded.

"What kind of site are you running?" Doug interjected, helping Phil with the small talk before they got down to brass tacks.

"Only the most tasteful and best site on the interwebs."

"And what's that, Al?" Phil pressed.

"The Jonas Brothers, of course." Alan said it as if it was common knowledge so Phil just looked at him and nodded as if understanding.

"Of course."

"How have you been, Phil? Is your divorce final now?"

"It's final. Signed the papers today."

"I'm sorry for your loss." Alan reached out and took both of Phil's hands in his, holding them there as if consoling a grieving widower at a funeral. "I also understand she left you for Lauren's Thaiwanese cousin," he added, pronouncing Thai as thigh.

That was the in Phil needed. He looked over at Doug and then dropped his head grimly for theatrics. Heartbreak in his eyes, he nodded. "It's been very hard and lonely. I'm glad I have such great friends during a time like this but when I go home, it's just me now. Sometimes I wish I could just get away from it all, even if only for a few days."

"What do you mean, Phil?" Doug asked, playing along.

Phil met Doug's eye again and continued. "I dunno, I've been thinking about how the last time I think I really had any fun was when we were all together in Thailand for Stu's wedding. Sure, it was crazy and a few times we almost died, but that comraderie and that amazing place, it was almost..." he trailed off for affect, trying to stare off as if lost in the moment

"Magical," Alan finished the sentence.

Phil bobbed his head with a yes. "That's exactly what it was. It was magical." Now to lay it on thick. "Someday I'll get to go on another trip like that with the three of you, when my kids are grown and I'm done paying child support."

"Phil, that's not for another fifteen or sixteen years." It was as if Doug and Phil were tag-teaming each other within the conversation. Phil set something up and Doug interjected with something to further it along, to reel Alan in. Doug wasn't totally keen on doing it, but when it came down to it, he was a little nervous that if Phil didn't get out of dodge for a while, he would start to go down a downward spiral and spin out of control. He had been a horrible player before he met and married Stephanie and she had seemed to be the beacon he needed in his life to give him stability and comfort. A year ago, that rug was pulled out from underneath him, leaving him a bit lost, personally. Doug wasn't doing this to manipulate Alan into treating them all to a trip, or just treating himself and Phil to it. He was doing it for Phil. Because he knew Phil would do the same for him.

"There's nothing I can do about it, man," Phil continued on. He sat up and ran a hand through his hair, frowning with a slight sigh. "Money's going to be tight for me for a long time to come. No more extras."

"I'll take you wherever you want to go, Phil."

Phil and Doug looked at Alan. That was quick.

"What?" Phil asked, honestly. He wasn't expecting Alan to pony up that soon.

"We're a wolf pack and a wolf pack stays together through thick and thin. When one wolf is hurting or needs help, the other wolves rise to the occasion. Like the Golden Girls when Rose lost her husband and moved in with the other ladies."

Phil smirked at the random reference. "What are you suggesting, Al?"

"We should all go on a trip together. My treat."

Doug caught Phil's eye. "Uh, Alan...that's really kind of you, but you don't have to do that. Even if we did all go on a trip, I can afford to pay my own way, as I'm sure Stu can."

"No. I have to do this," Alan adamantly spoke, standing up with his fists balled. He looked down toward his feet and an expression of sadness or possibly guilt spread over his face.

"Why do you have to?" Phil was actually taken aback. The plan to get Alan thinking it was his idea about the trip had gone off more easily than he could've imagined but he couldn't understand Alan's urgence over it.

"Because I owe you guys. I screwed up in Vegas and Thailand." Again with the mispronunciation of the Asian country. "It was my fault we got into that trouble. It's my fault Stu married that whore, Teddy lost his finger, that Mr. Chow got arrested by that federal agent that took my hat." Then he added, sadly, "And monkey got shot."

"You didn't know what would happen, Alan," Doug assured. "You just wanted us to have a good time. Your heart was in the right place."

"It means a lot that you think so, but I need to make amends for my past mistakes and treating all of us to a nice vacation is what I must do."

Phil was truly touched by Alan's insistance and his reasons behind it. Phil suddenly felt moved, which, if it was made known and it had happened to anyone else, he probably would've called them a faggot. This time, however, he started to see Alan as more than just the weirdo Doug had married into the family of. He was their weirdo.

Without further adieu, he stood up and pulled Alan into a bro hug, patting his back. "I can't begin to thank you for this, man. You're a real good friend, you know that?"

When he released the stocky man from the hug, Alan kicked his feet at the ground and smiled as if saying, Oh shucks. "You really think so?"

"Do I think so? Fuck, I know so." Phil laughed. He gestured with his hand for Doug to stand up. "C'mon, let's give this tubby fucker a group hug."

Doug smiled and got up, getting on the other side of Alan. The three embraced as heterosexually as possible, with Alan like a kid at Christmas.

"We should hug again like this when we're together with Stu. Then the circle will be complete."

"Alright, buddy. Just, not in public."

"Okay," Alan concurred quietly. It was obvious he had been planning a big group hug in some public setting in his mind at that moment before Phil shot it down.