Simple Kind of Life

Avery stood, glaring at her newest painting. A frown decorated her face. Something about it wasn’t right. She couldn’t seem to get the right shade of yellow for the daffodils and the sky wasn’t blue enough. And the texture. There wasn’t enough texture. Her focus had been off recently and her paintings were suffering.

“Ughh.” She growled, crossing her arms over her chest. With a sigh, she dropped the brush into a jar of murky turpentine before taking off her apron and hanging it up. There was no hope of getting anything done, not with her head so foggy.

She took her paintbrushes down into the kitchen and washed them with soap and water. Phin prancing into the room caught her attention. From his mouth hung a white sock, Avery’s sock. He shook his head, swinging the sock around as if to mock her.

“Damn it, Phineas!” She dropped her paintbrush and lunged at him. He was too quick and avoided her hands before escaping into the living room. She followed after him, swearing under her breath the whole time. It didn’t take long for Phin to get comfortable in his new home and soon he was wreaking havoc on it. Specifically on Avery’s socks. He didn’t bother with Lili’s because he worshipped her and Aaron’s were usually sweat soaked and disgusting, leaving Avery’s as his prime target. She tried keeping the door to the laundry room closed, but he always managed to weasel his way in. And if that didn’t work, he would knock over her clothes hamper and go to town.

The puggle yelped at her as if this were a game to him. He dropped his front paws, lifting his butt in the air and he wiggled his tail playfully.

“Drop it, Phin.” She inched her way closer to him. “Who’s a good boy? Is Phineas a good boy? Yes he is.” She whispered softly to him, reaching her hand down. She was just a few centimeters away when the doorbell rang and he was off like a rocket.

“Crap.” She huffed, standing up straight and smoothing out her t-shirt. "This isn't over, mutt." She called after him as she headed toward the front door. She opened it to find Cam, Jeff's teammate, standing before her.

"Is something wrong?" Avery asked, clearly confused by her presence.

"No. No, I was in the neighborhood and-"

"You're not the first Flyer to use that excuse."

"No really, I was at my dad's for dinner. He lives in Red Rose Gate."

Avery's cheeks flushed with embarrassment. Red Rose Gate was a development connected to hers, so Cam was quite literally in the neighborhood.

"Oh. Sorry. Come in." Avery stepped aside and let the young girl inside. "What brings you over?"

"Nothing really. Just thought I'd stop in and see how you're doing," She paused for a moment. "You know you have paint all over you, right?"

The woman inspected her arms and clothes and highly suspected it was on her face too.

"Yeah. I was working on a new project. I get kind of lost in it." Avery crossed her arms over her chest. "Did Jeff send you?"

Cam shrugged indifferently, but her slight grin confirmed her suspicions. "Maybe."

"You don't have to do that. You can go-"

"I have ice cream and wine." She held up a plastic bag that Avery hadn't noticed until then.

"Make yourself at home." The two women laughed and Avery fetched glasses and spoons. She poured the red wine into the glasses and placed them on the coffee table. They sat in the couch and Cam held up two pints of Ben and Jerry's.

"Chunky Monkey or Phish Food?" Without hesitation, Avery reached for Chunky Monkey.

"It's pretty quiet. Where's the kiddies?"

"Aaron is at a friend's and Lili is spending the weekend with her dad." Cam nodded.

"You're on good terms with him?"

Avery lifted a shoulder. "We're getting there. James moved in with his mother so Lili isn't alone with him."

"That's good." Phin entered the living room, sans Avery's sock and made a bee line for Cam. The puggle loved new people. "Is this Jeff's apology?"

"Yep. His name is Phineas. It’s a pretty stupid apology, huh?"

"Incredibly," She scratched behind his floppy ears. "He's cute though."

"You want him? He's a sock eater."

Cam laughed. "What?"

"He eats my socks and only my socks. He won't touch anyone else’s."

Cam cackled as she pulled the dog into her lap. He happily licked at her face. "Phineas, I don't believe it."

"Believe it. He's pure evil."

Cam frowned. "But look at him. He's too cute to be the instrument of the devil."

Avery popped the seal of her ice cream and dug in. "So how's he doing?"

Cam shrugged before placing dog on the ground and opening her ice cream as well. Phineas' bugged out eyes shifted between the two women, waiting for one of them to give him a taste of the dessert. "Jeff? He's still an idiot, so nothing's changed."

That made Avery smile. "What was he thinking?"

Cam shook her head and brought a spoonful of ice cream to her mouth. "I have no idea. He just wants to make things right, but he doesn't know how. This whole relationship thing is new to him."

"Obviously."

"Are you even interested in fixing it?" It would be a lie to say she didn't miss having him around, but she couldn't seem to let it go. It made her realize that he wasn't ready to be in a serious relationship.

“I don’t know,” She took a sip of her wine. “We have such different lives. How is it going to work?”

Cam shrugged. “Do you want it to work?”

If Avery was honest with herself, she’d admit that she did want Jeff around. After her marriage to James crumbled, Avery truthfully thought she’d never feel good about herself again. Divorce was a very shameful and embarrassing situation for her and it left her with a bruised ego and a heavy heart. Jeff made her feel happy. He gave her back her confidence.

“Yeah. But if he’s gonna act this way, I don’t see it working.”

Avery could tell the girl didn’t have anything to say by the way she stared into her wine glass. "Well, if it's any consolation,” Cam finally spoke up after a moment of silence. “He's been so mopey lately, I can't stand it. He's like a kicked puppy or something equally pathetic."

"Is that why you're here, to make me feel bad for him?"

She shrugged. "Maybe."

Avery grinned. "You don't have to stay if you don't want to."

"It would actually be nice to hang out with someone that isn't full of testosterone. It's hard being the only girl all the time."

Avery nodded and smiled. She couldn't imagine what that must be like, being surrounded by men 24/7 with no one to relate to. So Avery entertained the girl, ordering a pizza before Angie stopped over. She seemed surprised to see Cam there, considering she wasn’t fond of Avery.

“What’s she doing here?” Angie asked casually as she grabbed a wine glass out of the cabinet in the kitchen while Cam sat in the living room.

“She just stopped over. I think she was trying to plead Jeff’s case for him.”

“Well of course she is. You won’t hear him out.”

Avery frowned. Angie made it perfectly clear from the start that she didn’t feel like Jeff was entirely wrong. “Whose side are you on?”

“You know I love you and I’ll always have your back. He was a creep for banging some random chick and not telling you, but you guys never defined your relationship.”

Avery narrowed her eyes at her friend. “Don’t start.”

Angie just smiled cheekily at her younger friend before returning to the living room.

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"You keep making faces and it'll get stuck that way." A wicked smile crossed Angie's lips as she told Lili the famed old wives tale. The child was sitting at Avery's vanity mirror as her mother did her hair, sticking her tongue out and crossing her eyes. Lili's dance teacher wanted them all in tight ponytails with curls for their recital, so Avery was currently removing the curlers from Lili's naturally wavy hair. The dark strands sat nicely in tight spirals.

Angie was applying some rosy blush to the apples of Lili's cheeks, making her look like a ceramic doll.

"Can I wear makeup all the time?" The child asked, examining herself in the mirror.

"No." Angie and Avery said simultaneously.

"You are way too beautiful for makeup." Avery reasoned, removing the last curler and throwing it on the vanity table with the others.

"Then why do I have to wear it now?" The women paused and glanced at each other. How do you explain that the lights on stage tend to wash out everyone's skin tone?

"It levels the playing field. You don't want to make all the other girls feel bad about being ugly, do you?" Avery could strangle Angie for such a vain explanation. The last thing she needed was a diva attitude from her four year old.

"I guess not," Lili mused for a second before changing the subject. "Is Jeff coming?"

The two women exchanged glances again before Avery spoke. "I don't think so, Squeaker."

She frowned. "Why? Is he mad at us?"

Avery hoped the child wouldn't notice Jeff's absence. Or at the very least, wouldn't ask about it. But she did. It had been a few weeks since she last heard from the hockey player. He no longer called or texted, so she figured it was over.

"No, baby. He's not mad at us."

"Then why doesn't he come over anymore? Is he sick like Daddy was?"

Avery shook her head. This was her first relationship after James, so she had no idea how to tell Lili that Jeff won't around anymore.

"He's not sick. He's just very busy with hockey." She didn't see the point in upsetting the child before her dance recital. It could wait until after. Avery was grateful for the lack of a temper tantrum, but the sadness on the child's face still made her heart hurt.

"Cheer up, honey. Hank and I will be there to see you." Angie offered, shrugging her slim shoulders.

"And Grandma Cruz too." That seemed to put the pouting on hold for a little while. Once Lili was hairsprayed and dressed in her tutu, the women headed downstairs to find Hank and Aaron chatting with James' mother. They all admired how beautiful Lili looked and it made Avery proud.

The group drove to the dance studio and Lili's instructor whisked the child away to the back stage of the little auditorium. There were folding chairs set out in front of the small stage for all of the parents. Avery and her entourage sat up front and waited for the show to start as the seats began to fill. The lights dimmed and crowd grew quiet in anticipation for the little girls.

A chorus of "Aww"s filled the room as the ballerinas pranced onto the stage in their little tutus. Avery broke into huge smile when her uncoordinated child came into view. Lili may not have been as graceful as some of the other girls, but her round face always lit up when she danced.

In Avery's peripheral vision, she sensed someone sitting down next to her. She glanced over quickly and turned her gaze back toward the stage. And then her brain registered the blond hair and slouched shoulders, making her head snap in his direction.

"What are you doing here?" She whispered, her eyes burning into the side of Jeff's head.

His eyes stayed fixated on the stage. "Watching a recital. The little one on the end invited me." He nodded toward Lili. The little girl gave him a discreet wave as she danced and her smile grew wider. Jeff returned the small gesture, grinning as well.

Just when she thought she could stay mad at him, he had to go and ruin it by showing up. But she still had a few grievances to air out with him, though she didn't think she would have the opportunity to do so. Avery wasn't naive nor was she stupid. She knew how athletes functioned, she knew about their lifestyle. She honestly figured Jeff would move on without a second thought. And yet, he was sitting next to her at Lili’s dance recital.

After a couple of dance routines, there was an intermission for snacks. But Avery wasn’t interested in that. There were a few things that she needed to get out in the open and she needed to do it now. She grabbed Jeff by the arm and dragged him out of the auditorium to the front of the building. Immediately, she regretted not grabbing a coat.

“Listen, this is my life, OK?” She poked Jeff in the chest with her finger. It was obvious that he was taken by surprise, but he remained quiet. “It’s not a simple kind of life, but it’s mine. That little girl and my brother are my world. They will always come first. They will always come before me, before you, before going out to some bar, before everything. Understand?”

He nodded and continued to be silent. She took this as a sign to continue her tirade. “If at any point, you don’t want to do this, that’s fine. It won’t hurt my feelings because I know that I’m a damn good woman and anyone who ends up with me should thank their lucky stars. And if you don’t want to be that guy, then that’s your fucking problem.” She crossed her arms tightly over her chest. “And for the record, you are not the be-all and end-all. I was just fine before you and I’ll-”

Jeff nodded and pulled her into a warm hug, ending her rant. The woman stood rigid against him, but soon found herself relaxing against his embrace. She didn’t realize how much she missed being close to him until she was pressed against him. He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her lips. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, connecting his light eyes to her dark ones. “I should have admitted my mistake to you. I never should have tried to hide it. I was scared to lose you because I-” He paused and let out a gust of air. “I care about you. And your family.”

Avery wasn’t sure what to say except to return the sentiment. “We care about you too.”

He nodded. "Listen, I can't promise that I won't screw up every now and then. But I want this to work. I want to give this an honest effort. Just give me the chance to prove it to you.”

The woman sighed and peered down at her feet. “OK. We’re going out for dinner after the recital. You’re welcomed to come along if you want.”

He grinned. “I’d like that.”

She finally pulled out of his hug and started to go back inside. Her gaze fell on him as she held her hand out. “Just so we’re clear. It’s official, yeah?”

He chuckled and grabbed her hand, letting her lead him back into the studio. “Yeah.”