One Day, We'll Both End up in Hell
02
All girls are evil in the inside. Just like all boys are all perverts in their mind.
Josh will never know the terrible things running through my mind and that's the way I want it. The day we never spoke to each other again never did any justice to me. I want closure and I'm going to get it.
I'm intent on not leaving him alone until I destroy him completely. Not literally of course, that would be murder. However, if I could, I would push him off the ends of the Earth. I'm looking to destroy his mentality, break apart his person. When I'm finished with him, he'll be the lonely person in the corner. Girls will no longer find him attractive and guys won't find him cool. He's going to wish he never met Harrie Rowan.
Mark my words, Josh. You'll be nothing. Just like how I am.
I pulled up tumblr and checked the “pretty girls” tag again. I expected the same pictures I saw about 20 minutes ago, the self portraits of themselves, with wide smiles and part of their arms caught in the corner. I wasn't looking for amateurs, I was looking for professionals taken with fancy cameras. I was looking for the future models, the “girls of tumblr.” I was grateful for new pictures to see, but of course, they were the typical photos you'd see on myspace. I was losing hope, until I saw the one.
She was extremely cute, with pale blue eyes and a strange hairstyle. It was very unique though, her head of hair dyed white and the ends blonde. I went on her tumblr page and saw that she had many more pictures of herself. I analyzed her body, having the curves and boobs I didn't have and never will. Josh would love her. Josh would also love to have her come over to his house on a weekly basis, for memorable sleepovers.
Of course, Amelia Shea wouldn't be able to do that. She's not real. She's a persona I created, entirely out of my imagination. I always did enjoy roleplay, so this would be fun.
I created the Facebook page and typed in all my basic “information.” The real girl's name, who I don't remember, started with an M, and she lived in Hawaii so she wouldn't able to track me. I saved about 30 pictures and created a folder in my desktop called “Amelia Shea.”
I decided to add a bunch of random people, so she would seem normal. Her hobbies? Clubbing, drinking, Photography. Relationship status was the first one I changed, single beaming up boldly on the screen. Immediately comments started pouring around asking who I was along with comments on my pictures, with random boys telling me how beautiful I am. I simply ignored them after answering a few. Then I found Josh, which was strange to see his name on the search box, after he had blocked me.
I clicked “Add as friend” and played the waiting game.
xxx
-Josh-
Thanks sweetheart, but I should be saying the same to you ;D As I typed, I was smiling to myself. I was the luckiest bachelor in the world. I get all the girls and they all want me; and I just knew this girl wanted me.
Before she could respond, I typed out another, So why don't we get to know each other? My house or yours?
It took her a while to respond to this, but she finally answered back with, Neither.
I furrowed my eyebrows and contemplated on a response. I was starting to feel an emotion, I've never experienced before. Feeling....awkward. It was so strange to see a girl reject me for the first time ever. Usually I had no problem getting anyone I wanted, even shy, rejected, plain girls. For all I know, Amelia could be playing hard to get.
Seriously
Dead serious. Why don't we just actually try to get to know each other? You know.....talking?
You're kidding me.
Unless you're scared that you can't make decent conversation? A man needs to learn how to use his brains rather than just his penis.
I stared dumbfounded at the screen, absolutely speechless. My luck was slowly going down the drain, she wasn't playing hard to get. She was literally hard. She wasn't even looking for sex, she just wants to talk! When was the last time some girl just wanted to “talk” to me? I thought for a second and I swore a certain someone came to mind. I shook it off, unable to think of a face.
Heh. I can pull of a conversation.
Oh really? Tell me something about yourself.
It was definitely my turn to take the longest to respond. What could I say to her? Partying and hooking up? Those were true, but to a brainy like her, I assume she'd just delete me off her friends. I couldn't lose to someone like her, because I had the determination of wanting to sleep with her. No doubt she looked like a good fuck. Her body was perfect. Here I was, literally whacking my brain, all because I'm making an effort for once.
I like to study. I typed up the most bullshit lie in the book.
Studying sucks. Why would you take an interest in it?
I swallowed hard. Too brainy? Oops typo! I mean reading
Favorite book?
Shit. Shit. Shit. I didn't know any books because I didn't read! How was I supposed to impress her now?
Um it's called Atonement
By Ian McEwan?
Yes
I let out a sigh of relief, patting my shoulder for the excellent excuse I came up with. Like that certain face, the certain title of the book came up in my head. In all honesty, I didn't know why or give a crap whatsoever.
What a coincidence. Me too. Favorite scene?
Idk?
Exactly! I bet you haven't read the book
Suddenly sentences began to pop up one by one, like some kind of chain reaction.
You don't even know what it's about do you? It's about a girl Briony who witnesses several sexual tensions between her sister, Cecilia, and Cecelia's lover, Robbie. She gets a note from Robbie, which is supposed to be given to her sister Cecilia, but she opens it anyway and finds a vulgar word in it which causes her to think that Robbie is ---
I stared blankly at the I.M and she kept going, literally telling me what the whole book was about. I leaned back in my chair and groaned. Was she even worth it? I just had to kept playing the game a lot longer, so I can sleep with her.
I swiveled my chair away to my desk and to my nightstand. What really made me curious was how I remembered the name of this book, because I had no idea what Atonement really meant. I opened its bottom drawer and dug through mindless junk that I dumped from school, ranging from folders to crumpled papers. I dug in deeper and felt a smooth spine, I grabbed hold of the object and pulled out, finding myself staring at the cover of a tattered Atonement. Where the fuck did this shit come from?
I found myself thinking harder and harder, turning over to the book's back, flipping through pages. Why did this seem so familiar to me?
Harrie Rowan.
At that moment, I threw the book so hard, it flew out my window and landed in the rose bushes with a satisfying thud.
Josh will never know the terrible things running through my mind and that's the way I want it. The day we never spoke to each other again never did any justice to me. I want closure and I'm going to get it.
I'm intent on not leaving him alone until I destroy him completely. Not literally of course, that would be murder. However, if I could, I would push him off the ends of the Earth. I'm looking to destroy his mentality, break apart his person. When I'm finished with him, he'll be the lonely person in the corner. Girls will no longer find him attractive and guys won't find him cool. He's going to wish he never met Harrie Rowan.
Mark my words, Josh. You'll be nothing. Just like how I am.
I pulled up tumblr and checked the “pretty girls” tag again. I expected the same pictures I saw about 20 minutes ago, the self portraits of themselves, with wide smiles and part of their arms caught in the corner. I wasn't looking for amateurs, I was looking for professionals taken with fancy cameras. I was looking for the future models, the “girls of tumblr.” I was grateful for new pictures to see, but of course, they were the typical photos you'd see on myspace. I was losing hope, until I saw the one.
She was extremely cute, with pale blue eyes and a strange hairstyle. It was very unique though, her head of hair dyed white and the ends blonde. I went on her tumblr page and saw that she had many more pictures of herself. I analyzed her body, having the curves and boobs I didn't have and never will. Josh would love her. Josh would also love to have her come over to his house on a weekly basis, for memorable sleepovers.
Of course, Amelia Shea wouldn't be able to do that. She's not real. She's a persona I created, entirely out of my imagination. I always did enjoy roleplay, so this would be fun.
I created the Facebook page and typed in all my basic “information.” The real girl's name, who I don't remember, started with an M, and she lived in Hawaii so she wouldn't able to track me. I saved about 30 pictures and created a folder in my desktop called “Amelia Shea.”
I decided to add a bunch of random people, so she would seem normal. Her hobbies? Clubbing, drinking, Photography. Relationship status was the first one I changed, single beaming up boldly on the screen. Immediately comments started pouring around asking who I was along with comments on my pictures, with random boys telling me how beautiful I am. I simply ignored them after answering a few. Then I found Josh, which was strange to see his name on the search box, after he had blocked me.
I clicked “Add as friend” and played the waiting game.
xxx
-Josh-
Thanks sweetheart, but I should be saying the same to you ;D As I typed, I was smiling to myself. I was the luckiest bachelor in the world. I get all the girls and they all want me; and I just knew this girl wanted me.
Before she could respond, I typed out another, So why don't we get to know each other? My house or yours?
It took her a while to respond to this, but she finally answered back with, Neither.
I furrowed my eyebrows and contemplated on a response. I was starting to feel an emotion, I've never experienced before. Feeling....awkward. It was so strange to see a girl reject me for the first time ever. Usually I had no problem getting anyone I wanted, even shy, rejected, plain girls. For all I know, Amelia could be playing hard to get.
Seriously
Dead serious. Why don't we just actually try to get to know each other? You know.....talking?
You're kidding me.
Unless you're scared that you can't make decent conversation? A man needs to learn how to use his brains rather than just his penis.
I stared dumbfounded at the screen, absolutely speechless. My luck was slowly going down the drain, she wasn't playing hard to get. She was literally hard. She wasn't even looking for sex, she just wants to talk! When was the last time some girl just wanted to “talk” to me? I thought for a second and I swore a certain someone came to mind. I shook it off, unable to think of a face.
Heh. I can pull of a conversation.
Oh really? Tell me something about yourself.
It was definitely my turn to take the longest to respond. What could I say to her? Partying and hooking up? Those were true, but to a brainy like her, I assume she'd just delete me off her friends. I couldn't lose to someone like her, because I had the determination of wanting to sleep with her. No doubt she looked like a good fuck. Her body was perfect. Here I was, literally whacking my brain, all because I'm making an effort for once.
I like to study. I typed up the most bullshit lie in the book.
Studying sucks. Why would you take an interest in it?
I swallowed hard. Too brainy? Oops typo! I mean reading
Favorite book?
Shit. Shit. Shit. I didn't know any books because I didn't read! How was I supposed to impress her now?
Um it's called Atonement
By Ian McEwan?
Yes
I let out a sigh of relief, patting my shoulder for the excellent excuse I came up with. Like that certain face, the certain title of the book came up in my head. In all honesty, I didn't know why or give a crap whatsoever.
What a coincidence. Me too. Favorite scene?
Idk?
Exactly! I bet you haven't read the book
Suddenly sentences began to pop up one by one, like some kind of chain reaction.
You don't even know what it's about do you? It's about a girl Briony who witnesses several sexual tensions between her sister, Cecilia, and Cecelia's lover, Robbie. She gets a note from Robbie, which is supposed to be given to her sister Cecilia, but she opens it anyway and finds a vulgar word in it which causes her to think that Robbie is ---
I stared blankly at the I.M and she kept going, literally telling me what the whole book was about. I leaned back in my chair and groaned. Was she even worth it? I just had to kept playing the game a lot longer, so I can sleep with her.
I swiveled my chair away to my desk and to my nightstand. What really made me curious was how I remembered the name of this book, because I had no idea what Atonement really meant. I opened its bottom drawer and dug through mindless junk that I dumped from school, ranging from folders to crumpled papers. I dug in deeper and felt a smooth spine, I grabbed hold of the object and pulled out, finding myself staring at the cover of a tattered Atonement. Where the fuck did this shit come from?
I found myself thinking harder and harder, turning over to the book's back, flipping through pages. Why did this seem so familiar to me?
Harrie Rowan.
At that moment, I threw the book so hard, it flew out my window and landed in the rose bushes with a satisfying thud.