Welcome to My Reality Show

I can do this. I know that I can. It’s not like Alex is my main support. Okay, so he’s a huge part of it, but I have Mickie. We can get through the scary photographers together if we try to. I’m just horrible at talking in front of cameras like that. I always have been. It’s just gotten a little better with Larry constantly following me around. But talking to interviewers has never been my forte. It’s different than talking to Larry or the confession cam.
Mickie gave me a small, unsure smile before she got out of the car. I soon followed along with our E! Managers and assistants in tow. We don’t get to see them a lot, but at these types of things we do. Mickie and I posed together and separately before we were stirred toward the E! cameras where Ben Lyons stood, waiting for us. I smiled and we shared a small hug with a kiss on the cheek.
“This is insane!” He nearly yelled.
I laughed and looked around the carpet. Tons of people came out, which made me laugh. I don’t even know why we’re here in the first place.
“I know!” I replied.
“Are you excited to watch Beastly?” He asked me.
I nodded eagerly.
“Of course I’m excited!” I laughed. “It’s huge! I’m just glad that I can be here and be a part of it.”
“You look fabulous by the way.” He smiled. “Your show, Meet The Gaskarths, is on our network, and it’s been going really well,”
“Thanks,” I smiled at him.
“The viewers have expressed how much they love it.” Ben explained. “We even got word that you guys are renewed for a second season.”
“No way!” I exclaimed. “That’s awesome. I didn’t know that.”
“Well now you do.” He replied. “Where is the husband tonight?”
“He’s playing a show. They couldn’t make it tonight, so they sent us to do all of the dirty work,” I stated playfully. “We’ve been on tour for a week or so now. It’s been…interesting.”
“We just started filming again, actually,” Mickie added.
“What can we expect for the remaining episodes? You’re only three episodes in.”
“You should expect complete mayham,” I laughed. “We are a crazy bunch.”
“That’s right. I’m going to let you lovely ladies go ahead.”
Mickie and I waved bye before walking back on the carpet. We stopped for a few more interviews before heading into the theatre. I didn’t realize that we were going to a movie premier. It’s a little hard to fathom. My life has been flipped upside down in the past twenty-four hours that it’s insane. I don’t know what to do with myself anymore.
As soon as the movie ended, we booked it out of the theatre. The show was still going on, and I didn’t exactly want to go back just yet. I rather go do something entertaining than go back to reality. It’s kind of stupid that my reality feels like a nightmare, but whatever. Stupid shit happens, and I hate it. I feel like the situation is way out of control. I just want to go back, and stop Alex from walking out of the hotel room on me. That stupid bastard.
“Can we go like get something to eat or something?” Mickie asked, linking her arm with mine. “I’d suggest McDonalds, but this dress is fucking expensive.”
I laughed at my best friend.
“How about we eat at Planet Hollywood, yeah?” I asked.
“That sounds good. I feel like we’re way overdressed though,” She laughed.
“Honey, it is New York. I don’t think that they’ll notice.” I rolled my eyes.
Mickie stuck out her tongue at me before we found our car. We got in and told the driver to take us to the restaurant. Our agents moved on in another car. It made me laugh. They basically do nothing. We would be better off with Matt as our agent, and he already does so much for All Time Low. It would be kind of selfish to ask him to help us too.
I didn’t expect the photographers to follow us to the restaurant. It was weird. At home we don’t get this much attention. I guess it’s because it is New York City. Famous people walk around here all of the time. I don’t know what makes us so important. We’re just on a reality show. Sure, I’m married to Alex, but Hollywood gossip shows never follow them around. This is completely different than that.
“Why are they following us?” I asked, shielding my eyes from the camera’s flash.
“I have no idea?” Mickie replied. Her response sounded more like a question than it did a statement.
Various photographers started to shout random statements at us, but they were all a blur. I couldn’t hear a specific question over them all. Mickie and I just continued to walk toward the entrance instead of stopping. It was kind of hard, considering all of the people but we finally managed. The hostess looked a little confused when we walked inside. The photographers hung around even when we walked in. I watched them crowd around the restaurant with wide eyes while Mickie spoke to the hostess about getting a small booth in the dining area.
“I’m sorry. This doesn’t usually happen,” I apologized. “We…uh…this is actually the first time it’s happened.”
Mickie nodded.
“We’re probably as freaked out about it as you seem to be,” She added.
The hostess looked a little scared but nodded.
“Party of two?”
“Yes,” We replied at the same time.
“We have a free booth right this way,” The girl, who looked like a teenager, showed us the way. She stopped in front of the booth that was pretty close to the window. “I’m sorry…this is all we have right now at the moment…” She trailed off with a slight blush.
“It’s fine,” Mickie smiled.
“We don’t mind,” I added.
The two of us sat down at the booth, and placed our purses on the table. I sighed, and looked outside. It was dark outside, aside from the camera flashes, and it was pretty. Times Square has always been one of my favorite places to spend my time at. I feel in love with this place when Mickie and I first visited here when we were younger.
“What are you going to do about Alex?”
I sighed and turned toward my best friend.
“I think I’m going to take a train out of here first thing Sunday morning.” I admitted. “I’m staying for one more show, but that’s all. I don’t think that I can handle being with him right now.”
Mickie sighed.
“Mac, you’re running away,” She stated.
I rolled my eyes.
“I’m trying to be realistic. I don’t think that I can be around him.”
“And going back to Maryland is going to solve that? You both need to have a real talk about this. That argument you two had earlier was pretty damn childish if you ask me. You have to be adults about it, Mackenzie.” Mickie explained. “If you want to have a good marriage, it takes work. Do you really think that couples that stay together forever don’t do anything? They work, and they pray for what they have. It doesn’t just happen.”
I chewed on my lip and nodded.
“I know, I know,” I replied. I avoided my best friend’s gaze. Instead, I focused on the inside of Plant Hollywood. It was kind of dark in there, which I was kind of thankful for. Maybe no one will see us. I don’t want to be interrupted right now. I just want to be normal again. I don’t want people taking pictures of me eating. How gross is that?
“Obviously you don’t,” Mickie sighed. “You are only making this worse by ignoring him,”
“I hate him,” I shook my head.
“No, you don’t. You wish that you did, but you don’t. You can’t hate him, no matter how much you want to. I want you to hate him. Hell, I’m pretty sure Jack wants you to hate Alex too. It’s just not possible,” She cracked a smile. “I know you, Mac. You’re going to forgive him, no matter how much you don’t want to.”
I looked down at my hands.
“What can I get you two to drink?”
“Water, please,” I mumbled.
“I’ll take a tea.” Mickie replied afterward. “Come on, Mac...you’ve gotta grow up.”
My head snapped up.
“What do you mean?”
Mickie smiled sadly at me.
“Be the bigger person. If he can’t grow up, you have to.”
“Please, I act like a grown up enough for the two of us,” I rolled my eyes.
“Then take action, and do something.” She huffed. “You have to talk to him…properly.”
I nodded in agreement. I knew that I needed to, I just didn’t want to. I don’t think I know how to talk to him without getting mad and yelling like we did earlier. I don’t know if I can keep myself from crying. It hurts. I may be whining to myself about it, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. I don’t know how to begin to forgive him. I don’t know if I have it in me.
“Mickie, I don’t know how,” I admitted.
“I don’t know what to tell you,” She shrugged.
Dinner was quiet before we ordered, but we slowly picked back up conversation. By the time that we were finally done, we were laughing again. That was until we saw all of the photographers outside…still. I linked my arm with my best friend as we shoved our way through them. I tried my best to ignore them, but it was really hard. Some of them were mean, and they only wanted to get a bad reaction out of us. That doesn’t make sense to me, but whatever. If they don’t like us then why are the following us?
We got back to our car, and our driver drove us back to our hotel. Mickie and I decided to skip the rest of the concert. I didn’t want to be there when they got off of the stage. I just wanted to relax with my best friend. We shacked up in my and Alex’s hotel room with some DVDs that we brought from home. I changed out of the gorgeous dress into some comfortable sweats and a t-shirt. I threw my hair up into a bun before wiping all of the extra make-up off. When I was free from anything glamorous, I flopped on the couch in the room. Mickie just finished taking off her make-up too.
“What do you want to watch?” She asked, walking over toward the TV set.
“How about Mean Girls?” I asked with a small smile. “It’s my favorite.”
My best friend smiled.
“Yay!”
I giggled.
“I bet you that I know every line to this movie.”
“We both probably do,” Mickie nodded before sitting down on the couch with me. “We’ve got about an hour until they get back here. Matt knows that we’re here,”
I sighed, and yawned.
“Whatever. Let’s just enjoy the movie. I don’t want to think about Alex right now,”
“Deal…” She trailed off.
I don’t want the hour to pass…at all. Where’s a time machine when you need one?