A Bleeding Lily
Lifeless
2 April 2008 {Wednesday}
The D.A.'s office wants me to be their key witness. I agreed. They're going for the death penalty. And this primal, savage part of me hopes that he'll get it. He deserves death, you didn't. And another part knows that his death won't bring you back. The court date hasn't been scheduled yet. But when it is, I want to be there. I want to see if that smug smile will still be on his face.
Mom wants me to go to therapy. She says I look like I'm spiraling down into a depression. I don't want to go. I'll sit in some office listening to a stranger tell me I need to let go, let go of you. I can't do that, I won't.
I don't want therapy, I want that court date to come. I want to see his face as he hears that he's getting the death penalty. And I want to see him die. See him pay for what he's done. See him lifeless, unable to hurt anyone else.
The D.A.'s office wants me to be their key witness. I agreed. They're going for the death penalty. And this primal, savage part of me hopes that he'll get it. He deserves death, you didn't. And another part knows that his death won't bring you back. The court date hasn't been scheduled yet. But when it is, I want to be there. I want to see if that smug smile will still be on his face.
Mom wants me to go to therapy. She says I look like I'm spiraling down into a depression. I don't want to go. I'll sit in some office listening to a stranger tell me I need to let go, let go of you. I can't do that, I won't.
I don't want therapy, I want that court date to come. I want to see his face as he hears that he's getting the death penalty. And I want to see him die. See him pay for what he's done. See him lifeless, unable to hurt anyone else.
♠ ♠ ♠
Keep telling me what you think.And random note: I kind of want to try to start making the entries a bit longer.
~aep