Sounds of Rain

Before I even realised how much time had passed, Parker and I were celebrating 3 months together. I went to his house practically every other day and everything was just perfect.

"Do you wanna meet my mum?" I asked Parker one evening when we were chatting on the phone. "You could come over for dinner tomorrow night." I wondered whether he'd actually want to - it was kind of a big step and we hadn’t really discussed anything about our relationship. I didn’t know whether he wanted a serious relationship or just wanted to...have fun. Of course, I did hope that he wanted to have a proper relationship, because I desperately wanted that with him.
"I'd love to," Parker said enthusiastically and my heart did a little flip in my chest.
"Yeah?" I whispered, grinning.
"Yeah," he said, "I can tell how important your mum is to you and I would really like to meet her." I grinned even wider and bit my lip. I didn’t know what to say next or how to express how I felt. I had the sudden desire to run straight over to his house, crawl into his arms and go to sleep. I sighed heavily into the phone.
"And maybe you could stay the night afterwards?" I asked hopefully.
"Sounds good," Parker said happily. We'd never really spent much time at my house because I knew with my mum around we wouldn't get much privacy. She'd never really understood that concept. A sudden wave of nerves hit me and I considered taking back my invitation, knowing that Parker would find my mum so beyond eccentric.
"Maybe it isn’t such a good idea..." I said quietly. "My mum isn’t...um...I don’t really know how she'll behave. She's never met a boyfriend before and she might, um..."
"Ireland," Parker stepped in, stopping me. "I'm sure everything will be fine." He paused before continuing. "But if it makes you uncomfortable, then I don't have to come over. I don't want to make you nervous." I took a deep breath and a smile tugged at the corners of my lips and I remembered why I'd wanted him to come over in the first place
"You're amazing," I whispered, closing my eyes with a content smile. "I want my mum to meet you, I do. I'm just going to be a bit...nervous. I don’t know what she'll do."
"It doesn't matter," Parker said gently. "Nothing your mother does will make any difference to how I feel about you." I smiled and suddenly felt like I could cry.
"I wish you were here right now," I whispered. Parker just sighed and I knew he felt the same way. We hadn't seen each other for nearly a week because my mum was starting to get bored and kept wondering around without really considering where she was going. And around here, near the river and the thick forests, if she wondered off too far, she would get lost.
“I know,” he whispered back, his deep voice making shivers run down my spine. “I miss you.” A grin blossomed over my expression at his admission.
“I miss you, too,” I told him. I shifted onto my side and pretended that Parker was behind me, spooning me and holding me tight. I closed my eyes again and sighed softly. “I wish I could spend the night with you…” I told him quietly. While I did spend a lot of time with him, I’d never stayed later than 9 o’clock, knowing that I needed to be at home to make sure my mum was okay. Parker didn’t reply for a second, but I could still hear him breathing.
“Me, too,” he whispered. “I imagine it would be pretty amazing waking up with you in my arms.” I smiled softly, imaging that very scene.
“I could make you breakfast in bed,” I whispered. “And we could just cuddle and eat in bed…”
“Sounds perfect, baby,” he said softly and I smiled. I just made a mumble of agreement.

Not much later, we both said goodbye and hung up, planning to speak again tomorrow morning to arrange what time he needed to get to my house. I fell asleep with a smile on my lips, imagining Parker lying behind me, holding me tight.

-&-

Parker and I agreed that he should come over at about 5 o’clock – that way, my mum could get to know him a bit, and get used to him before dinner. I was planning on making a chicken stir-fry, which wasn’t all that complex, and I knew Parker would be happy to help me with it. Plus, him arriving that early meant that we could spend more time together.

I told my mum that my boyfriend was coming over for dinner, but she didn’t seem to really react. She just nodded and then walked to her bedroom and closed the door. After staring at the closed door, I sighed and headed downstairs to the living room and kitchen to tidy, just in case there was anything out of place.

I felt nervous for the whole day. I had no idea how this evening was going to go. My mum had never met any of my friends before, let alone a boyfriend, and so I had no prior experience to help me through this. At 4.45, my mum emerged from her room in a different outfit. She was wearing a floor-length black skirt that swished when she walked passed me, and a red blouse with a black cardigan over the top. I wanted to tell her that she didn’t need to dress up for tonight, but I knew she wouldn’t listen.

At exactly 5 o’clock, the doorbell rang. I jumped up from where I’d been perched on the sofa and practically ran to the door. After unlocking and opening the door, my eyes fell on Parker. “Hi,” I breathed.
“Hey, Ireland,” he smiled, stepping forward to lightly kiss my cheek. I blushed and pulled him inside, closing the front door behind him. “Are you okay?” he asked softly, obviously sensing that I was a bit flustered.
“I’m fine,” I told him with a small smile. I moved forward into his arms and held onto him tightly. I really had missed him these last few days. I breathed in his familiar scent and exhaled contentedly. Parker gave me a final squeeze before pulling back. Turning, I saw my mum in the doorway to the lounge, watching us. “Mum, this is Parker, Parker, my mum.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” Parker smiled, holding his hand out.
“Nice to meet you, too,” she smiled, shaking his hand reluctantly.
“You have a very nice home,” Parker said politely and my mum just smiled.
“Um, mum, we’ll be upstairs, okay?” I told her, hoping she’d give us a little time to ourselves. My mum just nodded and wandered back into the living room. I sighed and took Parker’s hand and led him up to my room.

I was kissing him before I’d even managed to shut my bedroom door. “I missed you, Parker,” I whispered in between kisses.
“Mm, I missed you, too,” he whispered, pushing me against the now closed door. His lips moved down from mine and started attacking my neck. I moaned softly as he sucked the tender skin into his mouth. I knotted my hands into his hair and pulled tightly, never wanting to be separated from him. A moment later, I pushed back against him and navigated him backwards across my room until he fell onto the bed. I fell on top of him and he then rolled us over so he was hovering above me. In the past, at his house, we’d never gone further than heavy kissing. Part of me was ready to go further. But it was kind of awkward knowing my mum could interrupt us at any second.
“Wait,” I whispered when Parker’s hands crept under my shirt. He pulled back and looked down at me.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, frowning gently.
“I just…um…” I stammered. “I can't with her downstairs…” Parker smiled gently and pecked my lips once more.
“I know,” he nodded. “And I would never ask you to.” I smiled at him and kissed him once again.
“You’re amazing,” I whispered. Parker just shook his head, but didn’t bother arguing, which made me smile.

About half an hour later, we headed downstairs and I got out everything that I’d need to make dinner. “You cook?” Parker asked and I nodded.
“My mum used to,” I told him quietly, in case she could hear us. “But then…she kept forgetting, or would burn things. So I just took over.” Parker nodded gently. “She could if she wanted to, I guess. But I just do it now, to make it easier.”
“You’re an amazing son, Ireland,” he said softly. I just blushed and shrugged.

Just over an hour later, we were sitting round the table eating the simple yet delicious stir fry Parker and I had made. “So how are you liking Alaska, Mrs Smeath?” Parker asked my mum politely and my mum hesitated before shrugging.
“It’s been a very nice place to live,” she said. “Very hospitable.” A sudden clenching in my stomach made me drop my fork. Parker looked at me, obviously concerned, but I didn’t even spare him a second glance. ‘Very hospitable’. Those were the words she said every time she was considering leaving somewhere. No, I though desperately, No. We couldn’t leave!
“Ireland?” Parker asked cautiously. “Are you okay?”
“I…I’m, uh, yeah,” I nodded, smiling unconvincingly at him. He frowned gently at me, sending me a look that told me he’d be following this up later.
“Has Ireland told you about all the places we’ve lived?” mum asked, as though nothing unusual had happened. But to her, nothing really had.
“Um, yes,” Parker replied smoothly. “He said you’ve moved about quite a bit.”
“Yes, I don’t usually like to stay in a place for very long,” she said. “Has he told you about his father?” I closed my eyes, wishing the floor would just open up and take me away.
“Um,” Parker said again, and I could feel his gaze on me. His hand went under the table and rested reassuringly on my knee.
“He wasn’t a nice man…” mum continued, obviously not sensing Parker’s discomfort with the conversation. “I don’t want to risk him finding us.” Although this was the reason I’d always assumed, she’d never actually confirmed it before.
“Mum, dad left us, he wouldn’t come back,” I told her, just as I’d told her plenty of times before, but she didn’t listen.
“Don’t want to risk it,” she repeated, shaking her head and prodding a pea on her plate. I sighed and lowered my gaze to my plate. “I don’t like staying anywhere for more than a month, really.” And with those words, I just couldn’t take it anymore.
“Excuse me,” I said sharply and stood up and left the room. I couldn’t sit there listening to her remind me that she didn’t like staying in one place for very long, when all I wanted was to be here, with Parker, forever.

I escaped up to my room and sat on my bed. A moment later, there was a knock on my bedroom door and I called out for Parker to come in – I knew it would be him. “You okay?” he asked gently, closing my bedroom door behind him once again. He came to sit beside me and took my hand in his, linking our fingers.
“Yeah, I’m sorry, I just…” I sighed, leaning into his warm chest. “She just…reminded me of something that I’d chosen to forget.”
“What?” Parker asked gently.
“We’ve been her for over 3 months, Parker,” I told him. “That’s a record for my mum’s relocating. What if…what will happen if she decides to move again? I don’t…I can't...I…” I trailed off and shook my head. “I don’t want this to end.”
“Hey,” Parker said softly, raising my face so I would meet his gaze. “This isn’t ending. You never know, this may be the place where your mum settles down. If you’re usually out of a place in 2 weeks, maybe that’s a sign that she likes it here. And besides, even if you do leave, that doesn’t mean we’d have to end.”
“But…I could be anywhere,” I whispered.
“I know,” he nodded. “But I’d rather have you from a distance than not at all.” I smiled softly and sent up a silent prayer that my mum would want to stay here permanently.
“I’ve never felt like this before towards anyone,” I whispered. “If this is a crush…then I don’t know if I could take the real thing if it happens.” Parker pressed a light kiss to my temple.
“Ireland, this isn’t a crush,” he whispered. “Not to me. This is the real thing.” I grinned.
“I love you,” I said before I could stop myself from confessing that. Oh, God. What if he didn’t feel the same? What if this was too quick for him? What if he wasn’t there yet? What if-
“I love you, too,” he whispered, shifting closer to me. His lips hovered over mine for a moment and then he pressed them against mine. I melted against him. My hands found his shoulders and gently but forcefully pushed him onto his back and straddled his waist, while never breaking the kiss. I linked my fingers with his once again and then pinned his arms beside his head. Parker’s lips curled into a smile as we continued to kiss. “A little dominant, are we?” he smirked. I blushed, but lowered my head back to his lips, choosing to ignore his comment.

A moment later, however, a crash reached our ears from below us, and we jumped apart. We were both still slightly breathless as we crossed my room and headed downstairs. We got into the kitchen to find my mum standing in the middle of the room, smashed china around her on the floor. “I…I was tidying up and…it just fell…” she said. I smiled softly at her and crossed the room, careful not to stand on any shards.
“Come on, mum,” I said, taking her hand and leading her from the room. I sat her in her favourite armchair in the living room and turned the television on for her. “There, just watch television and relax. Parker and I will clear up.”
“But you cooked,” she argued feebly, already picking up the T.V remote. I just smiled and left, knowing that she didn’t really need me to argue back. I went into the kitchen, where Parker was sweeping the broken plates into a pile.
“You don’t need to do that,” I told him, but he just shrugged with a smile. I kept my eyes lowered, scared that I’d see pity in his eyes, as I put the larger pieces of broken china into a black bag. I was so used to people’s pitying gazes when they realised just how bad my mum was. It usually happened in public and with strangers, which was easier to deal with. I don’t think I could stand seeing Parker pity me because of my mum.
“Ireland,” he said quietly, but I ignored him and just continued to tidy up the mess. “Ireland, stop,” Parker said more firmly, coming to stand in front of me. I sighed heavily and straightened. I cautiously met Parker’s eyes, but rather than the pity I was expecting, I saw nothing but love and adoration, mixed in with respect and admiration. “You don’t have to be embarrassed,” he said softly, cupping my cheek tenderly. I closed my eyes, fighting the sudden lump in my throat. I’d never cried because of my situation with my mum before, but I was awfully close right now.

We tidied up the mess and washed up the rest of the pans we’d used to make dinner. I heard mum go up to her room and close her door and I guessed that she was going to bed. Once everything was clean, I locked the house and turned off all the lights and led Parker up to my room once again. I turned my bedroom light off and then Parker and I slowly took our clothes off down to our boxers, and slipped into bed. We didn’t say anything, Parker just wrapped me in his arms. I could tell when Parker fell asleep; his breathing turned deeper, but I couldn’t sleep. I’d been ignoring the signs, but I couldn’t now. My mum was going to want to leave soon. The fact that she’d become more restless recently and was leaving the house all the time was the biggest hint and I’d chosen to ignore it. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I tightened my grip on Parker’s arm that was wrapped around me. I didn’t want to leave him, I couldn’t. But if my mum wanted to leave…I couldn’t let her go on her own.