Taking Chances

It all started out simple. So simple really. Good things don’t come easily, not without a few scrapes along the way and that should’ve been my first clue. But I thought that maybe this time, I had finally found it without bending over backwards to keep it. Love.

We met through a friend of a friend. I was in my third year at university and so far hadn’t had much luck in that department. A few girlfriends here and there, maybe one or two guys thrown in, but nothing serious and nothing lasted more than a year. It wasn’t like I didn’t want anything serious but at the time, it didn’t feel right. Like I knew I wouldn’t be settling with this person so why bother? So once again, I ended up alone.

One mid-April day, I found myself sitting in the school’s cafeteria. There was a plate of untouched food pushed aside, my sketchpad in front of me taking up as much room as it could. Pencils, erasers, pens, and coloured pencils were scattered around the sketchpad and a few were on the floor as I was easily the clumsiest person ever and no organizational skills at all. I was working on a project for my advanced art class, a representation of what meant the world to us. There were also pictures of my parents and younger brother, and a group portrait of me and my friends beside me for my guidelines. It was actually coming out decently and I was rather proud of myself until I heard someone screeching my name and plop themselves down at the table beside me. This sudden jar from my own world to reality caused me to jerk my hand and a thick black line appeared over the outline of my brother.

“Sean!” I heard my name again and I sighed, looking sadly down at the line and up into the face of my best friend.

“What, Gavin? I’m doing something,” I told him and reached for an eraser to try to lighten the mark. Thank God I hadn’t started filling in with pen yet or else I’d probably have killed him.

“Look, mate, I’ve got something to tell you,” he started and then I saw his gaze shift down to my sketchpad. He tapped his finger against the stiff paper, looking at me almost seriously.
“You’ve got something right there, just so you know.” I scowled at him and started to erase it, telling him to get on with it. “Oh okay, right, see. I’ve set you up with someone.”

What. He didn’t. Dropping the eraser, I turned my body to face Gavin fully. “You did what?”

“Yeah! Sean, I set you up with someone. Well, it wasn’t all me but I helped. You’ve been so absorbed into schoolwork and it’s almost the end of the semester, you need to lighten up!”

Of course I’ve been so into school was because oh, this art project was nearly triple the points of anything else in the course, not to mention the other courses I was taking took up a lot of my time as well. Going out with someone right now just wasn’t a good time, maybe after the semester because if Gavin couldn’t tell, I was super stressed out enough without having to please another person daily besides myself. I was about to decline the offer when he started talking again, so I shut my mouth and went on about to finish erasing the mark.

“And the best part is, he and his mate are coming over here for lunch. Supposed to be here in about five minutes or so, I think. I see you’ve already been through the line,” he added, eyeing the untouched tray of food by him. He pushed it away with just his index finger then straightened up. “We’ll have to get you some more. It looks cold.”

Yet again, my eraser dropped. Can’t I just fucking get rid of this mark in peace? But what, wait. Did he say ‘he’ was coming soon? My eyes narrowed at Gavin as I looked at him again. Sure, I had said I had been with one or two guys and technically I could be considered bisexual, but they weren’t always my first choice. I was expecting him to set me up with some fake, blonde girl before he would set me up with a bloke. Licking over my lips, I continued to look at him the same way until he finally cracked and slunk down a bit in the seat.

“What? I’m just trying to help you out, bro. You need a distraction.”

“Thanks, Gav, really but I don’t need a…”

I was cut off by someone yelling Gavin’s name now and while he was distracted, I went back to erasing the mark finally. My blonde fringe flopped down in front of my face but I was too busy scrubbing at the paper to push it back out of the way. It would only fall back down again anyways so time and effort would be wasted. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw two guys come up to the table and sourly I thought if one more person caused me to make a mistake, all hell was going to break loose and I was going to go find some empty classroom to continue working. The two guys sat and one of them kept talking with Gavin but the other just sat there quietly. I could feel that he was staring at me and half of me wanted to ask what his deal was without looking up, but I bit my tongue and continued erasing. A few moments later I heard Gavin say my name again (at least he knew not to touch me ever while I was drawing) and I looked toward him, my fringe still hiding half of my face.

“Okay, so,” he started to say, giving a smug look to the guy he had been talking to. “This is Jamie, right, and that’s his mate, Ian.” He pointed to each person as he said their name and after giving Jamie a once over and a smile’n’nod, I glanced around to Ian. Alright so, Mr. I’m Just Going To Stare At You While You Draw, let’s see you.

I blinked back in surprise at the guy sitting across from me. He was definitely not at all what I thought he’d be, that’s for sure. Longish black hair that framed his face, five o’clock shadow that gave him that scruffy appearance and deep green eyes that seemed to look right through me. Clearing my throat after a moment of basically having a staring contest with Ian, I gave him a nod as well and then looked back to Gavin. He could see that he had done a good job in getting a guy for me and he looked smugger than before. I brushed his look off and went back to just idly scrubbing at the now gone mark on my paper. I had erased a little too much and would have to go back through and redraw it but no big deal.

“He’s speechless,” I heard Gavin snicker.

My head shot up at that, kicking him in the shin under the table. He yelped in pain and ducked down to hold onto his leg. That’s what he got for saying that. “Am not,” I said firmly. “I’m just…” I was lost for words as I tried to scramble around an excuse. “Trying to finish this up. You know I have a deadline.”

“Well can you stop for half an hour maybe so we can eat?” he asked through his teeth, still rubbing the probably sore spot on his leg.

“I’m not hungry,” Ian and I both said at the same time. That much had been obvious from the tray still sitting there. We looked at one another after that, making eye contact again that was so hard to pull away from. There was something there but I didn’t know what yet. I heard Gavin and Jamie both sigh and I looked over, giving Gavin my innocent but not so innocent smile.

“Look, I’m sorry but I’m really busy. I’ve got this to do,” I said as I motioned down to my sketchpad and then started to pack up. “Along with other things. This was probably just a waste of your time, so…” I trailed off, not knowing what else to say. I felt bad yes, because they both had gone through all this trouble but like I told Gavin, I didn’t want a relationship right now. Standing once I packed my things and slung my bag over my shoulder, I brushed my fringe from my hair and gave the two men a smile. “Maybe some other time,” I stated, staring right at Ian as I spoke. I meant what I said whole-heartedly too.

I turned on my heel, not bothering to take the tray with me. Swiftly I exited the cafeteria and was walking along the sidewalk to the building that held my next class. I reached into my bag to try to find my headphones when I heard someone calling my name. I swear, Gavin…

Turning around to see, I nearly collided with Ian, who had been jogging over to me. Now that I was closer, he smelled faintly of cologne and cigarette smoke. Not exactly a turn on but I’d give it a chance. Perking an eyebrow as my question of ‘what do you want?’, he straightened up from knocking back a few steps and brushed his own hair from his face.

“What time do you get out?” he asked. “Because I’d like to take you somewhere.”