Some Go Mad

The Doctor promised Rose that they could spend one day on the Titanic. He was nervous and on edge about the entire idea and that did not mix well with spending too much time aboard the ship. Rose tried her best to argue that they would have no fun with just one day when he was paranoid and she was seasick. But the Doctor wasn’t going to budge on this one. He had already been lenient with Rose and learned that it didn’t turn out well at all.

Rose had a love for history that was unbreakable. So, even though she was sure the Doctor knew everything there was to know about every point in history, she let herself run through facts and events of the R.M.S. Titanic, the excitement leaking through her voice and pushing away the nausea in her stomach that came with the pitching of an unsteady deck beneath her feet.

The Doctor had no problem following in Rose’s steps and listening to her chatter. If he had to admit, it felt nice to be quiet for once, to let someone else do the intelligent talking while he simply listened.

It all seemed to be going as smoothly as it possibly could. Rose was perfectly content to keep from major contact with any other passengers. She preferred to stick near the Doctor, only really leaving his sight when she spotted something that excited her enough that she dashed forward without a thought.

It wasn’t until the sun was setting that Rose’s disposition began to slowly calm into a tired buzz.

“You look less green,” the Doctor commented over their small section of table and the scatter of dishes and glasses that decorated it. Rose had stared in wonderment as the Doctor flashed a single piece of paper and easily accessed the most extravagant dining room on the ship.

Rose smiled lightly at him and took a sip from her sparkling drink.

“It’s sort of like leaving an amusement park,” the Doctor said, taking a stab at what had dampened his companion’s mood so suddenly. “Nobody really wants to go. Not even the parents.” Rose looked up from her food. “But we do have to sleep eventually. See other planets, as well. Other times. Romans, Monet—though, I must say, Monet might not be that great of a choice. I don’t think we need any more paintings of the Doctor.”

“This must be something so normal to you,” Rose said. “Seeing things like this.”

“I get around.”

“Explain what a Time Lord is.”

The question was thrown out so suddenly that the Doctor, momentarily, forgot that it was a demand for the definition of himself. When it flooded in and the waters calmed enough, he scrunched his brow together. “Why do you want me to explain that?”

“You’ve told me hundreds of stories, taught me all about planets and species that I’ve never heard of. But all you’ve given me on Time Lords is that…is that it’s…sort of like a club. And you’re always wearing those…things.” She pointed directly at him. Doctor looked down at himself and saw the shining buttons engraved with odd mixtures of circles and lines. He picked at them subconsciously while returning his attention to Rose’s frowning face.

“Rose, it’s sort of complicated—”

“Everything is complicated, Doctor,” Rose snapped. “That’s the kind of excuse I left home to get away from. Please don’t turn into my parents. I don’t need secrets kept from me like I’m a child who’s going to cry when they find out Santa isn’t real.”

“Funny story about that…” His words faded to nothing at the look on Rose’s face. His shoulders slumped slightly and he fell back in his chair, eyes already feeling far too tired.

“And this master deal,” Rose added.

Doctor snapped to attention. “What?”

“What Edgar told us. About the things that were chasing him. About the things he said were coming after me. About the stories their master told them.”

“Say that again.”

“Which bit? The one about aliens chasing me or the one about you killing your whole planet?”

Something sobered in the Doctor’s eyes, but he was still leaning across the table towards her. “Neither. The part about their—”

The ship shuddered and threw glasses and people to the ground alike. Rose jolted painfully against the wood of the table. Her eyes snapped shut against the pain in her ribs and stomach. Doctor was on his feet instantly, whipping around to stare at the ornate clock decorating the wall behind him.

“Rose,” he called, backing up with his eyes still fixed on the clock. He snatched at her hand. “Rose, we have to go.”

Rose gazed up at him with eyed still watering in stinging pain. She looked confused. “What?”

“I got the day wrong. We have to go!”

More shudders shook them. Rose covered both ears with her hands, trying desperately to shield her eardrums against the deafening sound of 11:40 PM on the R.M.S. Titanic.

Doctor grabbed her hand again and tugged her urgently out of her seat. They stumbled as they ran and it wasn’t until they were halfway lost on their way back to the TARDIS that Doctor realized Rose was yelling something and pulling back. He skidded to a halt and spun around.

“We really, really do not have time for this, Rose Jackson. We really don’t.”

“You can’t just leave!”

“We can’t? Watch this!” He grabbed her hand again and started the running. Rose stumbled after him for only a few feet before yanking free and stumbling to the ground as the ship continued to shake and shudder ominously. She ducked in a door and down a hall before Doctor could grab her again.

“ROSE!”

“Everyone out!” Rose yelled as she dashed down the hall, passing sleepily confused passengers that were ducking out of their rooms. “Get to the safety boats!”

“Ma’am?” The voice was weak and small enough that Rose almost didn’t turn around. When she did, an older woman stood near the relative safety of a wall, both hands occupied by smaller ones. Rose took in the sight of the mother and her two small children, one a tiny girl with curls and the other a young boy with wide eyes, filled with anything but fear. “What’s going on?” the woman asked.

Rose hesitated, her mind reeling. She snapped out of her daze when she heard the voice echoing down the hall again.

“Rose!”

“Come on,” she breathed in a rush as she grabbed the closest hand, the little boy’s, and rushed them down the hall, continuing her shouts for the other’s to get the safety as quickly as possible.

The ship gave a violent jerk that threw all four to the ground as soon as they stepped out into open air again.

“Come on, come on, come on,” Rose whispered urgently as she helped the others up and bustled them towards where she hoped, hoped, hoped the TARDIS was.

---

The Doctor’s steps slammed against the worn wood. In the back of his mind, he worried about the very plausible event of the wood snapping beneath him, possibly plunging him straight into a new regeneration. He ignored this and jumped the last four steps. He dashed past crates and luggage, hoping, hoping, hoping she had been clever enough to go back herself.

“Rose? Rose!”

A wave of relief washed over him when he saw the familiar girl standing in front of the TARDIS. He stopped to catch his breath. Then he noticed the three others. He stood straight again.

“No.”

“Doctor—”

“No, Rose.”

“Doctor, they’re children!”

The woman looked between the strangers with growing fear. The ship was still shaking, still groaning and pitching. They could hear the screaming

“What did I tell you?” the Doctor hissed. “I said this was dangerous! I said we were inside a flame! Not close, Rose. No, we are inside the fire! You shouldn’t even be touching anything!”

“Then what is the point of this?”

The words rang too clear, too familiar. A feeling of disgusting déjà vu washed over the Doctor and chilled his insides. He took a sharp step forward and opened his mouth to explain, to tell her, to show her exactly why she didn’t need to know what a Time Lord was—when the ship groaned and the walls snapped in a way that had everyone frozen in place. The Doctor turned his head, only just, only enough to catch the dent, to hear, in a sharper way, the caving of metal. He ran forward, towards the TARDIS. “Go! Go, go, go!” They shoved inside and slammed the door behind him.

Rose expected the Doctor to go straight to the controls, to start slamming and turning, and flipping things until they were safe. Instead, he stood in front of the doors, his jaw set, something horrible swimming in his eyes. Rose lowered herself beside the curly-haired girl and met the Doctor’s eyes with a silent dare.

“I don’t care.”

Rose set her own jaw.

“They have to go.”

Rose bit back the lump in her throat, fought the urge to claw at the stinging in her eyes.

“I told you.” He slammed a hand against the wall behind him. “I told you this was dangerous!”

Rose knew she should apologize. He had told her. And she had promised him she would heed those warnings. But the girl was clutching her sleeve with tiny hands and the woman had tears in her eyes, ready to replace the already dried tracks painting her pale cheeks.

“Do you have any idea what this has already done? Because I don’t! I don’t know what kind of waves have already started crashing, but something, something has happened, Rose, and it is—not—good!”

Rose flung herself to her feet. “Take them somewhere nice! They’re here! You can’t just throw them out there! They’ll die!”

“That’s what people do, Rose!” the Doctor yelled back. “They die! It happens! To you, to them, to everyone!”

“And what about you? What happens to you? You’re acting like this is something you won’t have to live with!”

“Of course I have to live with it! I have to live with all of it! That’s why I’m trying not to muck it up!”

The room fell eerily quiet. Rose took deep, measured breaths. The Doctor looked tired slumped against the doors, hands in his hair, breathing unsteady.

“I am trying,” he croaked, “to make things right. I am trying to fix things. I am trying to stop breaking things.”

There was something in the air that made everything feel fragile. Rose tried not to breathe, tried not to shatter everything around her. The silence stretched on for minutes. Rose tried to count the length of it, but the little girl was crying by now, her sobs coming out quicker than the seconds Rose was trying to concentrate on.

The first movement came when the Doctor slumped towards the controls. All pep was gone from his step, all spring and bubbly jumps deflated to long strides. His hands worked in a mechanical way.

“New York,” Doctor said after a minute of switch flicking and knob turning and screen staring.

Rose silently led the small group to the door. “Come on,” she murmured softly. “You’re safe. Come on. Out you go. Watch your step.”

The door closing was a difficult sound to swallow. Rose took a few counted seconds to breathe. She swallowed as much air as she could before turning around, hands shaking.

But the Doctor was already leaving, his footsteps echoing back towards Rose from the hallway that led deeper and deeper into the TARDIS.