Now or Never

Staring down at the stack of papers in my hand, I held back a few tears. This wasn’t how it was supposed to work. I was suppose to be the junior entry in the writing contest. I was suppose to be greeted by a smile and words of congratulations, not by a face of disgust and my writing shoved back in my face. I flipped through the pages of my masterpiece. What was wrong with it? Sure, it had been completely different than the first copy, but I had faith that my Literature teacher would understand the path I chose. Painful flashbacks went through my mind, “This isn’t you, this isn’t personal. This is taking steps backwards.”

Wiping away tears that managed to stray from my eyes, I took a deep breath and stepped foot into the classroom once again. I was curious to who got the spot instead of me. If it was that stupid excuse for a human being...

“It was Nick Jonas. You can stop wondering now.”

I stopped short. My hand grasped the threshold of the door to keep my body upright. That stupid bloody twat got my spot? Has the world officially gone mad? All he does is sleep in every one of his classes, and yes, I would know. Unfortunately, I had him in all my classes. The world does hate me. It’s official.

I hung my head and headed back outside. I was ready to go home and wallow in a corner. Great way to end one of the worst days of my life. It all started with this idiot of a freshman who decided to walk right in front of me with his repulsive looking hot dog that was absolutely covered in mustard. Mustard. I hate mustard with everything in me, and he got it all over me. Like it caught in my hair, all over my shirt, and it was just disgusting. Then I somehow left my project at home. It counted for 45% of my grade in AP US History. My day was just getting worse and worse by the minute.

The smell of mustard wasn’t helping this situation at all. I took one last look at the room that crushed all my dreams and ambitions in life before heading straight for my car to go home. I planned on baking brownies, cakes, and cookies to ease my shattered heart. Of course, something, or someone in my case, always seemed to ruin my plans.

“I guess she gave you the news, eh?” A taunting voice came from my right. My hands clenched themselves into fists involuntarily. I guess I had built up a lot of anger toward my ex-childhood best friend. More anger than I had toward any regular person, but he was the devil incarnate. I swear on my favorite Taylor guitar.

"It is that noticeable that I want to pull out each individual curl on your head and watch you scream in pain?" I snarled back. How did someone with his IQ beat me? I was third in my class. He wasn't even listed in the top twenty, but it's not like it phased him. His parents had met at Stanford, so his future was already planned out from day one. The building on the college campus with his surname was proof enough.

"Feisty, I like it. And someone had to knock you off your high horse. I'm surprised your head can still fit between doors." He smirked, leaning his body against the white wall behind him. in his hands, he had a few pieces of paper that had been haggardly kept together by a paper clip, but I saw the familiar entry paper on it the first page. The word "accepted" in all capitals caught my eyes.

"Are you sure we weren't talking about you? Even when you were a little innocent kid, you still thought you were the coolest thing in the world. I'm pretty sure that hasn't changed a bit." My fingers twitched in anticipation. They wanted to snatch those papers from his hand and cover his paper in insults and red pen marks.

"Babe, it's been a while since I was around the likes of you. Remember that." I crossed my arms across my chest in anger. He knew exactly which buttons to press, and I had nothing against him anymore. He was so different, so damn different. To think I actually almost fell in love with him just two years ago.. Counting to five silently in my head, the debate within my mind finally decided that it wasn't worth it. I took a step back, nodded a brief goodbye, and walked away.

I would be the better person, even if it killed me. He used to be my best friend, but after he moved, he changed. Let me begin from when we were six and spent every waking moment together. He was my next door neighbor in the upscale condos of New York, my partner in crime, and my best friend in the whole world, but he moved away after his eleventh birthday.

In all honesty, I was glad he did. After about third grade, he started to get more and more awkward around me. He wouldn't meet me eye to eye, and he would just say a timid hi and flee the scene. It was only me that he acted like this around. At school, he was still the big man. He always had this aurora around him that attracted eyes. His handsome looks and athletic build now brought the girls, but every once in a while, I would see eight year old Nick again. The same one I would get chased by gooses with at the park, the one I would tease constantly because I was taller than him, the same one I gave my first kiss too. Okay, it wasn't given willingly. More like stolen from me.

It was his eleventh birthday party. I was invited, of course. Our parents loved each other like they had grown up together. It was a boy and girl party, as we called it at the time, and was it a huge deal or what. Anyways, kids were leaving, and I was just sitting at the kitchen counter enjoying a delicious piece of vanilla cake. I was the only one in the room in my pretty blue dress that brought out my eyes. He came strolling in with his own plate and set it next to me. After making himself comfortable, we just sat awkwardly in silence. The only noise was the occasional scraping of our forks on the plates, and I could feel his eyes watching me. I knew something was going to happen, I just didn't know what.

When all of the sudden, I felt his grubby hand take a hold of my shoulder and his inexperienced lips touch my own. It was over before it started, but before I could even say a word, he was gone.

Not gone as in we never hung out again. Gone as in, his family left for the airport the next morning. He was moving to California for his dad's job. What kind of guy kisses you then moves without warning? My stupid so called best friend. He came back in time for freshman year, and he was different. A good different. His body was no longer at that awkward stage. He was mature and gorgeous. It was like he did a lot of growing up while he was away, and I fell for him like everyone else in my grade. He turned into the ultimate jerk, so it was short lived for me. Others, not so much. And it has been like that since.

When my trip down memory lane ended, I was already situated in my car. I threw my backpack in the passenger seat, along with my pathetic mess of a story. I stuck my keys into the ignition and started my drive home. The music from my iPod soothing my irritated nerves and headache that pounded against my temples.

The peaceful scenery of trees and open fields soon dissipated into the rushed traffic of New York. I loved my prestigious high school that was nestled within the country side, but I hated returning to the real world everyday.

Slowly making my way through the rough traffic and constant beeping, I managed to make my way to the parking garage under my building. Sliding my car into my reserved space, I adjusted the gear shift to park and turned off the engine. I twisted my body to the right to collect my papers when something caught my eye.

A bright green sticky note was stuck to one of the papers, but the font wasn't familiar. I grabbed it and pulled it closer to my eyes.

This is what your story should have looked like. -Mrs. Cartwright

I peeled the note back, and my eyes widened after reading the first sentence. My jaw dropped open, and I was taken aback. It didn't seem like I was breathing. And this sure didn't feel like reality. Was I dreaming?

He was eleven years old and eating vanilla cake the night he fell in love.

I opened my mouth to comment at his stupidity, but I was speechless. He was in love with me? Almost instantly, my mind went back to memories. Memories that I tried to shut away in the furthest part of my mind. His grin, not the fake half smile he tossed around. The real deal, sparkling eyes and everything. The way his hair was just so curly, but it fit him. His carefree laugh, his daredevil ways, how he always seems to coax me out of my goody two shoe ways when we were little. Was he someone I wanted to trust with my heart?

The answer was clear as water. Abruptly I jumped out of my car, locked it behind me, and sprinted to the elevator. The quiet music in the background did nothing to calm the butterflies in my stomach. I was already half way down my hall by the time the doors were completely open.

"Mom! Where does Nick live again?" I burst into the foyer, probably giving my mom a few gray hairs.
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"2181. Are you and that sweet boy rekindling your friendship?”

The slamming of the door and a quick, "Sorry!" was her answer. I didn’t even spare her a glance, otherwise I would have saw her knowing smile.

With the knowledge of his condo number, I ran back to the elevator. I didn't even realized he lived two stories above me. I actually thought he resided a few blocks away from me. I was tapping my foot with impatience when the elevator signaled that it had reached the lobby. Nineteen stories away.

It was now or never. I headed back a few yards and made a left into the stairwell. He better be worth it.. My long legs ate up the two stories, but I still wasn't in the best shape to climb stairs. Stopping to get my heart rate back down to normal, I then wandered down the hallway, searching for right door. I grinned when I saw it and was building up strength to knock on it when it opened. He wasn't expecting me on his doorstep, and I was thrown in for another loop. Man, was he gorgeous or what.

"Oh, it's you. Did you need something?" he leaned against the side of his door, a slight smile on his lips. Has his lips always been that kissable? Maybe I'm just turning into a horny teenager. I believe so.

"I-uh-I-what was our APUSH homework?" I mentally slapped myself in the head for that excuse. Of course I would know what our homework was. I wasn’t third in class for nothing.

He gave me a confused look, "Are you okay?" I dropped my eyes from his and started to back away. I wasn't ready to do this, I couldn't.

"UhsorryforwastingyourtimeokayIamleavingnow." I turned away and took a few steps away from him when I realized something. If I wanted this to go anywhere, I would have to do it. I would have to tell him first. He was worth it, but I couldn't...the words wouldn't come out. I took a big gulp and just went for it. No stopping me now.

"I love vanilla cake too." I turned around and looked him straight in the eyes. His eyes read confusion then shock. He opened his mouth to speak, but I kept going. He wasn't going to take this moment from me.

"I read your story. It was beautiful, and you deserved to win. You put more feeling into those words than anything I've written."

He gave me a small grin, acting nonchalant, but his eyes gave him away. They were sparkling. I bit my lip, trying to keep myself from grabbing his shoulders and pulling him down for a kiss.

"And I loved the part where you s-" and his lips were on me. And you could say at that moment, I felt complete.