All Around Me

On stage, Frank looked fine. But down here at the bar, he didn't look fine at all. He was too pale, and his shirt hung off him in a way that made me think he had lost a lot of weight in a short amount of time. His black hair looked limp and lifeless and he had purple bags under his eyes, although he smiled at me when he saw me staring. "Hi."
"Oh, erm, hi." I replied stupidly.
I hadn't been expecting him to talk to me. I thought it would be pretty hard to engage him in conversation, particularly because of the teenage girls around us who were sitting at the bar with their sodas and whispering and giggling to themselves while shooting Frank looks of such adoration that I felt nauseous. Frank took no notice of them and kept his eyes on me, the thin smile still gracing his lips.
"Did you enjoy the show?" He asked, moving his chair closer to me.
I could feel the dirty looks I was getting from the younger girls who were sitting near us and tried not to laugh.
"Yeah, it was great." I said, but I wasn't really thinking.
I was trying to get Gerard to say something to me, something he wanted to tell Frank. But Gerard wouldn't even look at me. He was gazing at Frank intently. He was so close to him that I couldn't believe Frank couldn't feel it in some way.
"Can I buy you a drink?" Frank said, and I stared at him, trying not to frown.
"Sure.." I said, not really knowing how to react.
From everything Gerard had told me, I thought Frank was gay. No, I was sure he was gay. Was he this nice to everyone?
"What do you want?" I heard Frank say.
"Oh, whatever you're having." I said absentmindedly.
Gerard still wasn't fucking saying anything! Isn't this what he wanted? I didn't want to say anything without Gerard egging me along, if I did something wrong and ruined it I wouldn't be able to forgive myself.
"Gerard!" I hissed, trying to get his attention without making it obvious.
But Frank heard me anyway. He frowned at me as he handed me what looked like a large cola, and I ripped my eyes away from Gerard.
"What did you say?" Frank said warily as he picked up his own glass.
"Oh, I said, er.. Is it hard? Playing in front of an audience, I mean." I took a long sip of the drink Frank had bought me, but very nearly spat it out again. That thing was fucking burning me! I coughed and spluttered into my hand, earning a laugh from Frank.
"Dude, what the Hell is that?"
"That," Frank said, grinning widely and taking a long sip himself, barely flinching, "Is what makes playing a show not very hard at all."
"Are you even old enough to buy alcohol?" I said, pushing the glass away from me and trying not to shudder from the aftertaste.
"Well, I'm in the band." Frank said, smirking. He started moving closer to me then, and the girl were still shooting me dirty looks and Gerard still wasn't fucking looking at me or saying anything and Frank was acting really touchy feely for what I thought was a gay guy so I took matters into my own hands.
"I've been talking to Gerard." I said shrilly, and it worked.
Frank leaned back again, his brows furrowed. "Who?"
"Gerard." I said again, and let out a sigh of relief as I saw Gerard finally looking at me, although his face was showing no emotion. He was just staring with his large olive eyes. "And he wants to talk to you, too."
A dark shadow passed over Frank's face, but he hid it quickly with another, although strained, smile. "Sorry, I don't know who you're talking about."
I frowned at him, folding my arms. "Frank. I'm talking about Gerard."
This time, Frank didn't smile. He turned away from me and finished his drink in one long drink, then slammed it down on the counter. He turned back to me again, standing up. "Listen to me. I don't know anyone called Gerard. I've never known someone called that. I have to go now."
He threw some change on the counter and walked away. I looked hopelessly at Gerard, who finally found his voice. He looked at me with his wide olive eyes. "Go after him!" He said in a panicked voice, and as I slid off my chair and walked briskly after Frank again I wondered how much that must have hurt Gerard, hearing Frank say that he never knew him. I felt a sudden surge of anger towards Frank then, that I stopped in my tracks and turned to Gerard.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" I asked him seriously.
Gerard looked at me with a confused expression. "Of course I do. I love him, Sierra."
I held Gerard's gaze for a moment, and then sighed in defeat.
"Where'd he go?" muttered to myself. I had lost him in the sea of people who had gathered around.
And then I saw him again, but I wish I hadn't.
He was in the corner and he wasn't being very inconspicuous at all. I saw him counting out some money and handing it to a guy wearing a hat and a long jacket. Frank looked around quickly before taking a small bag from the guy, nodding his thanks and walking away, shoving the bag into his pocket. Even from where I was standing I could see that the bag had contained small white pills.
"Gerard." I whispered.
"I know." Gerard replied. His voice was shaking. "He's worse than I was."
"What do you want me to say?" I said loudly to Gerard, not caring who heard any more.
If Frank wasn't shocked out of this lifestyle he had made for himself I could see him taking the same path as Gerard, and I didn't even want to think about that.
"What do you mean?" Gerard said, ripping his gaze away from Frank once more.
"Something that will make him know that it's actually you I'm talking to!" I said exasperatedly.
Frank was walking away, and we were still following him, but he looked like he was about to go backstage again. Fuck.
"Frank!" I shouted, and upped my pace so I was beside him again.
Frank turned around with some sort of surprise, but his face fell when he saw it was me.
"Oh. What do you want?"
"Look, just believe me, I can see Gerard and he wants to talk to you again, he's worried about you, Frank. We all are."
Frank's face was set in an angry scowl and I half expected him to hit me, so I flinched when he shouted back at me.
"I don't even know who you are! You don't know me, you don't know anything about me! Leave me alone, and don't ever talk to me again!"
Frank spun around and stormed off again, and I turned to Gerard in desperation.
"The song. The one they're calling "Frank's Song"." Gerard said suddenly. "I wrote that song for him before I.. I gave it to him in the basement in Skull because I broke my promise. Tell him, Sierra!"
I hesitated for a heartbeat before taking off again, grabbing Frank by the arm.
"The last song you played." I said breathlessly, stumbling over my words, so eager to make him hear me out. "Gerard wrote it for you, and he gave it to you in the basement of the music shop because he broke his promise."
I wasn't too sure what this all meant, but it seemed important to Gerard. I kept eye contact with Frank for a moment, and I could swear I saw his face take on a sorrowful look before he put on the same, cold look he had been wearing since I asked him about Gerard.
He pulled his arm away from me and stared me down. Despite him being slightly smaller than me, I felt intimidated, and I took a step back involuntarily.
"I told you. I don't know anyone called Gerard. I don't know what you're talking about. Now leave me alone."
And then he turned around again, and he was gone.