Fix Me, Conflict Me

“I d-don’t even know! I called her cell, and she wouldn’t pick up, so I called her house phone and left her a m-message, and after that, I-I went to her apartment… I thought something happened to her because all her lights were off and the door was left open, so I freaked out and ran in and t-tripped on something that wet my arm… I freaked out some more and flipped on some lights, and that’s when I saw that I’d tripped on Maddie,” Bailey choked out, squeezing her eyes shut like that would make everything go away. I held the tissue box out to her and she grabbed a few, blowing her nose.

“Her blood was all over my arm, and I screamed because I thought she was… I-I thought she was –“ Bailey couldn’t even finish her sentence. I sighed and comfortingly rubbed her back. I knew what she was trying to say. I felt the same way when I found Daniel… “Then, I called up an ambulance and, well, here we are,” she finished, throwing her arms up to gesture at the ICU hall. I nodded, but she didn’t really answer my question.

I needed to know who did this to Maddie, who forced her to do coke, who beat and broke her, who violated her.

Because they needed to die.

“Hey,” Zack muttered, handing us each a bag from Chick-Fil-A. One bag was all mine, while Zack and Bailey’s food fit into one bag. I sighed happily as I guzzled down the sweet tea. Bailey didn’t want to eat, she just hugged Zack and cried onto his chest. Zack ate, though, and Bailey nibbled on a few fries after a while, but I totally inhaled my food, after drenching it all in Chick-Fil-A sauce, of course.

We just sat around, waiting for the doctors to tell us how Maddie was doing and whatever. Bailey didn’t talk much, and Zack just sat there to comfort her in silence. I texted Jack and Rian all night, telling them all the details. “Excuse me,” a nurse said when she walked past us. “Visiting hours are over…You’ll have to leave now.”

Bailey and Zack hesitantly got to their feet, but I remained seated. “I’m her boyfriend,” I said firmly, though that was a lie. Maddie and I barely talked and Baz was our only real connection, but I’d say anything to stay with her. Zack and Bailey looked at me with wide eyes.

“Oh…well, I suppose you could stay,” the nurse said hesitantly. “You’ll have to stay inside her room, though, sir.”

“Ok. Thank you. See you guys later,” I told Zack and Maddie, telling them to shut up with my eyes as I got up to hug them both goodbye.

“See you in the morning, bro,” Zack muttered, and I felt him slip his car keys into my pocket. He and Bailey walked out of the hospital together.

I quietly slipped into Maddie’s room, walking over to the reclining chair in the corner and making myself comfortable in it. Maddie’s face was peaceful, but pale. She looked so thin and frail in the hospital gown, but her arm was wrapped up very well now, so you couldn’t see all the cuts. I gnawed on my straw in worry when I saw how slowly she was breathing, how weak her pulse was. This wasn’t how I wanted to see her in my mind, but now there was nothing for it.

I wanted to see her wearing my beanie, my hoodie. I wanted to see her playing fetch with Baz. I wanted to see her eating a Weed Burger from the Paper Moon Diner because she just so happened to not eat meat. I could only see this bruised and scarred girl in my head now.

I sighed and forced myself to close my eyes, trying to get some sleep…

I only woke up because I was hit with a wave of coldness. “Ello, poppet,” Jack whispered. He was the one who snatched my jacket off me. “Zack’s coming back with some McGriddles. Rian’s sitting outside. I felt like waking you up since it is ten in the morning,” he said quietly, and I was blinking from the harsh sunlight coming through the window.

“Thanks,” I mumbled, rubbing my eyes and yawning. “What time did you guys get here?”

“Just about half an hour ago,” said Jack before he slowly walked over to Maddie’s side. “She’s pretty, Alex. It sucks that this happened to her.”

“You can say that again,” I muttered, getting out of the recliner. “Hey, I’m gonna go home. Change and stuff. Let my parents know I’m alright. See you back here in a few.”

“I’m gonna eat your McGriddles if you take too long,” Jack told me before hopping into the recliner. I just waved goodbye before taking Zack’s car and driving myself home.

My thoughts were conflicted, torn between Maddie and Daniel. I just lost Daniel. I couldn’t lose Maddie, too, even though I pretty much just found her, as well. When I went inside, Baz barked and jumped me, happy to see me, but most probably in need of a walk. I sighed and took him out to the back yard really quickly before running upstairs to shower. “Alex?”

I tried not to sigh at my mom’s voice as I turned to face her. “Yeah?”

“Did you have a good time with the boys at Jack’s house last night?”

I blinked at her, but didn’t miss a beat. “Yeah, but I forgot to bring extra clothes, so I’m just gonna shower and change and then me and the guys are gonna grab a bite to eat.” Thank you so much for covering for me, Zack.

My mom was positively beaming as she hugged me. “Alright, love. It’s good to see you out and about again. You have fun, now.”

I nodded before showering and dressing up in a rush so I could get back to the hospital. I’ll be damned if Jack really does eat my bacon McGriddles. Well, that and Zack texted me that Maddie was awake now.

I was determined to spend the day with Maddie, and to get her to tell me what happened to her that landed her in the hopsital...

Every lovely, awfully, wonderfully, gruesome bit of it.