Listen up Cause This Is Not the End

I woke up to Skyler bouncing on my bed.

"Skyler, what the heck?" I asked, a little annoyed.

He stopped bouncing and said, "Ronnie told me to wake you up."

"Well, i'm up," I said, getting out of bed.

I followed him out and down the stairs, where Ronnie was flipping a pancake. He looked at the me and smiled.

"Hi, sleeping beauty!" he exclaimed, walking to me and wrapping his arms around me.

"Hi," I said, clearly not in the mood.

He let go and backed away, then went back to the pancakes. I've been irritable lately, not because of him, or anyone, but because I wasn't feeling good. When I get sick, I'm not very nice. Of course, I knew what was making me sick. The baby, which I still didn't come clean about. So, they just think I'm sick and grumpy. I feel bad lying about Ronnie's own kid, but I'm not ready to tell him yet.

A sudden pain in my stomach made me gasp and place a hand on my belly. Ronnie looked at me in concern.

"Honey, you've been having those pains for weeks now. Are you sure you don't want to go to a doctor?"

"I'm sure," I replied, quickly.

"She's also not been acting herself lately," Jerry chimed in.

"Yeah, she's been being a bitch lately," Skyler replied.

I gasped and glared at him.

"Yeah," he continued, "What's going on with you, CJ? What crawled up your butt and died?"

"No, it's in my stomach," I replied, not realizing what I just said.

He gave me a look and asked, "What's in your stomach?"

"A baby! I'm pregnant, okay?" I yelled, surprising myself.

Both Skyler and Jerry's jaws were on the floor, and Ronnie dropped the spatula and looked at me in disbelief. At that moment, it registered what came out of my mouth, and I suddenly got hit with fear. I ran upstairs and to the bedroom, locking it and beginning to cry. I grabbed my phone and texted Jaime.

'Ronnie knows,' was the text I sent him.

'Oh my god, how'd he take it?' was his reply.

'He didn't say anything, he just looked at me wide eyed, and I ran upstairs. I didn't mean to tell him, Skyler said I was being a bitch lately and I blurted it out. I have no idea what's gonna happen now, and that scares me.'

"Cassie?" Ronnie's voice said, outside the door.

I didn't answer. He tried again.

"Cas, please," he said, jiggling the doorknob, "please open the door. We need to talk about this."

"Talk about what?" I said, "I'm pregnant, what's there to talk about?"

He sighed and said, "Well, can we at least talk face to face?"

I took a breath and got up, then opened the door. I looked up at him, with my red puffy eyes. He pulled me into a hug and I began to cry again.

He held me and we rocked softly, then after a full minute, he spoke.

"How long did you know?"

"Almost two weeks ago, the day you first met the guys. Remember when I took forever in the bathroom?" I asked.

He nodded, then went back to rocking.

"Ronnie?"

"Yes, baby," he asked, looking at me.

"Are you mad at me?"

"No, baby," he replied, "Why would I be? We're going to have a baby, I'm going to be a dad."

He thought of what he just said, then slowly started to smile.

"I'm going to be a dad," he repeated.

I nodded.

"And, you're going to be my wife," he said, a full grin emerging form his face.

I nodded again, which made him squeal, almost, and hug me tighter. He pulled away and kissed my head.

He then said, "Come on, let's eat, then spread the word."

Once again, my stomach replied for me. he laughed and took my hand, leading me down the stairs, to the kitchen. Jerry and skyler looked at us, looking sorry. Jerry was the first to speak.

"Hey, Cas, I'm sorry. I honestly didn't know."

"Yeah, CJ. I didn't know either. You said you weren't pregnant! I thought you were sick or something was bothering you," Skyler said, taking a breath.

"Yeah, I'm sorry I lied about that," I said, "I wanted to keep it a secret. I was embarassed almost. I didn't mean to take it out on any of you."

"It's fine," Skyler replied, taking a bite out of his toast.

"Come on, sit. I made lots of food!" Ronnie said, holding out a plate of waffles, bacon and sausages.

I sat down and he put the plate in front of me, which I dug into instantly. He laughed, sat down then him and the boys began eating their food. When we finished, Ronnie washed the dishes and the boys and I sat at the table and talked.

"So, Cas, how are you gonna tell everybody?" Skyler asked.

I pondered for a bit, then I said, "I don't know, facebook maybe? Or, I'll make a youtube video."

Ronnie finished the dishes and grabbed my camera, which was on top of the microwave.

He handed it to me and said, "Do it."

I turned it on, pressed the record button, and took a breath.

"Hello, people of youtube. I haven't made a video in a while, I know. Actually, the last video I made was when I was at Jerry's house," I said, then pointed the camera to Jerry, who smiled and waved, "So, yeah. He told me that there were rumors of me being pregnant with Jaime's baby. You should know who Jaime is, so I'm not gonna explain, but part of that rumor is actually true. I am indeed pregnant, only it's with Ronnie's baby."

I paused, then said, "I know I denyed it in Jerry's video, but now it's out of the bag, and this is going to make it official. I'm pregnant, Ronnie's the father, and I'm not going to try to hide it anymore. That's all I have to say about that."

I pointed the camera to Ronnie and said, "Look how excited he is!"

He looked up from my laptop, which he was using, and said, "I'm super excited! I honestly have never been this excited in my life. I'm going to be a father, marry the girl of my dreams, and now my life is complete."

I smiled, then said, "And, that's the end! Say bye, you guys!"

Everyone said bye, then I turned off the camera and put it down. Ronnie handed me my laptop, which was logged into youtube, and I posted the video. It was uploading, and I suddenly got a case of nerves.

It was obvious, because Ronnie said, "Don't be scared, baby."

"I'm worried about how my fans are gonna take it."

"They'll be happy for you! I know it!" Skyler said.

I smiled, then my phone began ringing. Ronnie saw me tense up, so he answered it.

"Hello?" he asked.

There was a silence, then he said, "Thank you! Oh, Cas is being nervous, because she just told the whole youtube population." More silence. "Yeah, you read my status? Yeah, Cas should put it as hers now." ... "Yeah, here she is!"

He handed me the phone and said, "Becca."

I felt relieved, then answered it. "Hey, Becca!"

"CONGRATULATIONS!" was yelled into my ear.

"That was my EAR, Becca!" I replied, laughing.

"Oh, sorry," she said, laughing, "So, what are your plans for today?"

"Actually, I want you to come over. You're an amazing artist, so I want you to come up with drawings for the baby's room. Will you do that for me?"

"Of course! I'll be over in 20 minutes, I just have to drop Nicoli off for his playdate."

"Mkay! See ya then!" I said, then hung up.

I put the phone down, then said, "Becca's coming over to help with the baby's room."

"Okay," Ronnie said, "Oh, hey! How bout I go out and buy a crib? We're going to need to buy one sooner or later."

"Great idea!" I exclaimed.

"Hey, Ron, do you need help with that?" Skyler asked.

Ronnie slid on his sandals, then said, "Yeah, I'm gonna need some help, come with me! Jer, you coming too?"

"Yeah, if you want," he replied.

"Yeah! The more, the merrier!" Ronnie said, grabbing his keys.

Jerry shrugged, then walked outside with the boys, leaving me alone. I got on facebook, then told everyone in a status my big news. I spent the rest of my lonelyness on the website, talking to my friends and family. I'm happy that they're excited. Soon, I got off of my laptop, then spent my time singing Pierce the Veil songs and trying to figure out how the baby's room should look. I was scribbling notes down on my notepad, when Becca knocked on the front door. I got up and let her in.

"Hey, congrats!" she exclaimed, pulling me into a hug.

"Thank you so much!" I replied, hugging back.

The hug ended and we walked into the kitchen, then both sat at the table.

"So," I said, "how should the room look?"

"Um," she said, then pondered.

She then got this sudden idea, then grabbed the pencil and began to draw. When she was finished, she showed me.

"Okay, it'll be a farm theme. One wall will have a blue sky with a farm somewhere in the distance and animals around it, and another wall will corn patch, the last two walls are a sunflower patch. And, I was thinking that the ceiling will be a sky, with clouds and birds."

She looked up at me, "So, do you like it?"

"Rebecca Lyn, you're a genius," I said, "We could get one of those mobile things with animals on it, and farm animal pillow pets and everything!"

"Yes! That's great! Hey, where's the boys?"

"Oh, they went to get a crib," I said.

"Ah," she said, "They needed three guys for that?"

"Yeah, one has money and the other two have muscles," I said, laughing.

Becca laughed with me, then said, "Cassie, that's horrible."

"Oh, you know I'm joking. Ronnie actually got a lot stronger in prison," I said.

"Did he?" she asked.

"Yeah, before jail, he couldn't lift me up with one arm, now he can. I can sit on his arm, and he could just walk around like I'm not there."

My phone rang. I looked at the screen, then said, "It's Ronnie."

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hi, baby. We got the crib, no problem. Is there anything else we should get?"

"Yeah, Becca and I decided on a farm theme, so could you get anything that has to do with farms? Like, cow pillow pets and stuffed animals?"

"Okay, babe. Huh, a farm theme... I like it! I'm looking at pillow pets now, and I'm putting a cow and pig in the cart," there was a pause, then Ronnie said, "Skyler just found a farm mobile! And Jerry found a lamp with cute little sheep on it!"

"Aww," I said, "Could you buy some paint, too? Like, gold, light blue, um... I don't know, farm colors."

Ronnie laughed, then said, "Farm colors, okay, I'll try. I love you baby girl."

"I love you too," I replied, smiling, "Bye bye!"

He said a quick 'bye,' then hung up. I went upstairs with the tablet, and Becca followed. We went into the baby's room, and she began drawing the designs on the boring, white walls. After a few hours, she was done, and Ronnie and the boys came home with the crib and paint. Becca told us what color to paint the drawings, and we each took a wall, then painted it. The pictures came to life with the paint, making the sunflowers look like they were dancing in the summer breeze, the sun warming everything it touches, and the animals grazing about. After a few breaks, and lunch, it was done. We came out tired as hell, but it paid off. We were sitting at the kitchen table, being lazy and tired.

"So, after we get our strength back, do you guys want to help me with the crib?" Ronnie asked, taking a sip of his iced tea.

"Yeah," Jerry replied, with Skyler nodding after that.

It was quiet for a minute, then Jerry asked, "What's next on the list after the crib?"

"Uhh," I said, "I don't know. What else did you guys buy?"

Ronnie took another sip of his drink, then said, "A dresser, changing table, and accessories."

"Okay, then we'll put the dresser and changing table in there, but let's put those in first," I said.

Ronnie got up and said, "Okay, let's do it. Come on guys."

Skyler and Jerry got up and walked upstairs with Ronnie. After about twenty minutes, Jerry came downstairs. He grabbed my hand and gently pulled it. I laughed and got up, then followed him upstairs, and to the baby's room, where the furniture was put together and positioned. Skyler was plugging in the sheep lamp when I came in.

I gasped and said, "Oh my gosh, this is perfect! It's beautiful! I love it!"

Ronnie got all fake cocky and said, "Yeah, well."

I laughed, then wrapped my arms around him.

"I love this," I said into his chest.

His chest moved as he laughed, and said, "I knew ya would, baby."

He kissed the top of my head and held me. I looked around and laughed at the dresser.

"Is that the kitchen stereo?"

"Yep!" he replied, letting go of me.

I rolled my eyes at him, then walked out of the room, everyone following. I looked back into the room.

I guess it's official. I'm going to be a mother.

I smiled to myself, shut the door and walked downstairs.