Love within Ashes

Chapter 5: Deference

As soon as I recovered my senses, I remembered myself to call uncle Bob. I flipped my phone and dialed his phone number, angry and confused. I heard it was ringing, and I waited for the lies he would tell me.

“Hello? Emma?” he answered.

“Bob, you better give me a reasonable explanation," I responded mad as hell.

“Emma, I’m sorry. I am so sorry,” he cried, “I needed the money so I started to sell, and then to use. But I’ve stopped! I haven’t done it anymore. That’s why I left Boston and came with you guys. I am really sorry. Emma?”

“Don’t ever expect me to see you with the same eyes. Say hi to Paul and Grandma,” I said firmly and then I hung up. I was too mad and tired to fight with him and decided to get some sleep.

I woke up feeling exhausted. From a busy happy evening the darkness swept away the happiness with the unforgettable events of last night. I couldn't stop thinking about the way Billy treated me, the strange but manly way he saved me, and that kiss.

"Oh, that son of a bitch!" I cursed.

He used me, he played with me. I couldn't forget his smirk, it was so evil, so cynical, so seductive. I wanted to absolve him from my mind, but like a snake he was creeping to my heart. When he kissed me, he aroused unknown feelings and thoughts in me. My soul wanted to see him again, but my pride convinced her that it was best to do the opposite. Anyways, I have to see him again, I have to pay him the rest. I promised myself that the next time I see him, I'll be strong and indifferent, I won't show any emotions. I would not let him harm me anymore, not even his cold stare or the way he talked to me. That's right, what didn't killed me made me stronger.

I ate a bowl of cereal and decided to start on a new collection of paintings, since I was one of the official artists in Mrs. Torrance's gallery. I dressed with blue jeans and a casual blue shirt, grabbed my instant camera and bag, and wandered in the streets with my sneakers. I wanted to add some special effect on my projects and so I chose graffiti. It was modern yet vulgar, and my paintings were clean, so they needed to be spiced up. I took pictures of some wall near a mini market, it was midday so the sun shone away my insecurities and fears. I got a couple of good pictures, when I saw a girl hitting a vending machine with her leg. She was small, had long blond hair, was a bit chubby but she knew how to make her body look great. She wore a decent low skirt, with a shirt and jacket, her eyes were green and her smile cheerful. She reminded me of my high school friend, back in New York.

"Do you need help?" I asked her while she frowned at me.

"It's ok. Thanks, anyways, those chocolates made me fat. So it's better for me to not eat them," she responded with a sigh.

I smiled at her, and I decided to walk towards a wall to take a picture of the graffiti when she spoke to me, "Are you visiting this side of town, 'cause you look like you ain't from here?"

"Oh, I came back. But I live close by."

"Really? You look too good to be hooker, you have a camera on your hand, and you treat people nice. Hmm, I thought those type of people were extinct," she said while I giggled.

"If that was a compliment, thank you. I'm Emma Collins, nice to meet you".

"Aubrey Dawson, nice to meet you too," she said while she shook my hand.

"Do you know a place where I can chill, maybe a bar or a cafe?"

"Yeah, I know some places. I chill and have fun at them".

"Oh, but are they dangerous?"

"Honey, you are in Rockside and in this side of town, danger is a sure thing."

We walked and talked as she guided me to a good place. I didn't know what to expect, but hoped it was some place civilized.

"Here we are! You'll have fun here. C'mon, It'll be fun, don't be scare," she said to me and the smile on her face assured me that I was in good hands.

I looked up to see the sign and it said "Four Roses". I remember this bar when Paul came, a year and half ago, but I never entered so I could try now. We entered the bar and smoke was everywhere, I tried to contain my breath to save a couples of seconds of my life. The atmosphere was dark and sinister, men looked at us with disgusting eyes, and I was repulsed by the fact that every man there saw us like some piece of meat.

"Emma, honey, just ignore it, and walk fast, we'll sit back there," Aubrey said while she grabbed my hand tight leading me to a table in the back, trying to walk in the middle of a crowd.

We sat down in a corner and Aubrey ordered two beers , but I changed the order asking for a lemonade instead.

"It's a peculiar place.... it's my first time in a place like this," I commented her while I tried to feel relaxed.

"Haha, then get used to it, this will be our hang out spot!"

"So, we are friends?"

"Hell yeah, honey. You are not a bitch. And I feel comfortable around you. We'll be good friends. Oh, and don't worry, I got your back. You seem too nice and too innocent. And that will be a big problem if you’re going to stick around here."

"Oh, ok! Thank you. I appreciate it. And I got your back too, if you need me for something.... "

"Just be a good friend."

"I will."

Aubrey and I chatted for about three hours, I told her I was a painter and she told me she was a waitress. I told her I lived here a year ago, and she told me she has never left Boston. She asked me about Florida and I told her that it was sunny and hot but I preferred the cold cloudy days the town offered. She asked if I had a boyfriend and I told her that I was single, I asked the same and she told me that she was dating a guy for four months. We exchanged some thoughts, some favorites and bias. She was really pleasant and funny, she made jokes and told me stories that were crazy. All of a sudden, the front door of the bar was opened and half the people there shut their mouths, while a group of eight men sauntered across the bar. Their pace inquired respect while it indicated danger at the same time. I immediately recognized Billy, who was in front of them as the leader. They passed by our table and, at the same time, Aubrey waved her hand to one of them, like she knew him. Billy looked swiftly in my direction, because he didn't moved his head completely, when he looked, I couldn't be sure if he saw me.

"We better leave, Aubrey," I advised her to save myself from him.

I was too scared to confront him now, I knew that right now was not the right time. I hurt his ego, and he hurt mine's as well. Although, I think he forgot all about it and moved on. He ignored me, so I thought that was a good sign.

"Why? Oh, ok, just give me a couple of minutes. I have to go to the bathroom," responded the saddened Aubrey.

"OK, hurry back, I'll be waiting here," I told Aubrey nervous and intimidated by the environment of the bar.

I spent eight long minutes waiting for Aubrey there, when out of the blue some dude came to me and offered me a drink, I denied politely but he insisted. He sat next to me, and I tried to convince the man that I wasn't alone and that he should be going. He insisted more and more to flirt with me, and I denied and rejected every flirt respectfully. But that man seemed to continue, no matter what.

____

Bodie's POV

We got to our room in the Four Roses. Billy wanted to discuss something with us. The initiation of Joe. Heco went to attend some business with his whore, while Spink, Tommy and Jamie played poker and Dog, Baggy, and I were playing pool.

"Shit, Heco!" Tommy said to the busy Heco making out with his girl.

"Yeah, he fucks anything, even coke," mocked Baggy while the girl showed her middle finger to him and left the room with Heco.

"Yo, dawg, when is Joe's turn?" I asked to Billy who wasn't in the area.

I went to look for him and found him at the door of our exclusive room. He was distanced, and theses days he was acting strange. He was bothered by something. I just didn't know what.

"What are you doing, dawg?" I asked him.

"Whore," snorted Billy looking to a table with a chatting couple.

"Are you ok?"

"Bodie, bring her. And take that fucking faggot out of here, teach him a lesson," ordered Billy with bright blue eyes that showed fury.

As he walked by me, I turned to see him, and I wondered what was happening to him. It was the first time he sought a girl and asked to bring her to him. But orders are orders and I have to leave my questions aside and do what I was asked.

____

“No, thank you. I’m ok. Will you please leave me alone!?” I told the inquiring man who didn’t left me alone.

And just when I was going to leave, a dark skinned man came to our table and lifted the man, who was bugging me, and shoved him brutally to another man who caught him and took the scared man to the exit. God knows what happened to him.

“Come," the commanding dark man, with a tattoo on his chin, said to me.

“To where?” I asked looking at him with wide open and scared eyes.

“Billy called you," he responded showing me the closed door in the back of the bar. I gulped and decided to follow him.

He leaded the way and I followed him. I was thinking almost the worst, I thought it was like some gangster movie, I was called to be murdered or something, but then, I looked back at the kiss Billy gave me last night and my mind went completely blank and naive.

When I got there I saw two small tables united with people sitting around them, I also saw pool table and a poker table as well. It was dark, gloomy and with poor lighting. Everybody had tattoos and dressed obscure. The air was just shadowy and intense. When I entered everybody looked and then continued doing what they were doing, the only one who didn’t looked at me was Billy, he lighted a cigarette and blew a smoke.

“Sit down, wench," commanded me.

I hated when he addressed me in offensive terms, but the fact that I saw him again made me do as he said.

“I’m going to pay you today, if you want. I have the money-,” I started to say but he interrupted me.

“If I want?” he snorted, “Do you have the money here?”

“No," I replied.

“Then why are you here?” he asked glaring at his cigarette.

“Huh?” I mumbled as I was captivated by the long beautiful eyelashes he had, and the that scars made him scary and striking.

“Are you here to pay me my money or to be all over a man?”

I was in shock, how did he knew I was near a man? I needed to be spared, so I decided to continue being submissive. That was the last thing I could do.

“Aren’t you gonna answer me?!” he yelled while he inclined his head to mine.

Everybody heard his bawl and stared at us. He stared at me with hostile eyes, and I only gazed his facial features and his little goatee. He looked at everybody and made a gesture, and everybody continued doing what they were trying to do.

“I came here for a drink. I didn’t know you were going to be here. I’ll bring you the money," I explained in the calmest tone I could simulate.

“Fine," he said while he stood up and put his jacket on, “What the fuck are you doing there, wench? Get moving!”

“Excuse me?” I obtusely asked.

He grabbed my hand and took me with him. Everybody were seeing us, and by the looks of their faces I think it was the first time he did something like that. I asked him where we were going but he ignored me. He tightly grasped my hand when we left the private room and walked through the bar. Everybody looked at us in awe and I blushed a little. Where he was taking me? Was he crazy? I wanted to escape from his hands but something about him made me feel secure by his side.